So, Who Wants To Know What Happened To The Baby?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Janna, Mar 11, 2007.

  1. Janna

    Janna New Member

    Maybe if we were prepared.

    Maybe if we were consulted.

    If this "baby" difficult child 2 was to tote around all weekend was okay'ed with me first, I may have felt differently.

    difficult child 2 is far from a parental figure. The "baby" was constantly being thrown around, shaken and yelled at.

    By 8:30 PM, it was crying so much (every 15 minutes) we couldn't stand it. difficult child 2 has to share a bedroom with 2 other children under the age of 10. There is nowhere he could have slept that we wouldn't have heard that thing constantly crying. It would not stop, no matter what he did.

    The "baby" slept in the trunk of my car :smile: I told difficult child 2 to go back to school, tell them I said this doll is not permitted in my home, and he can have it at the fosters.

    Dylan and easy child will not be doing this if I have any say in it at all.

    My tubes are tied, cut, burned and clamped for a reason. I thought the "baby" was funny at first, but it's not, and I don't want to put up with it.

    Maybe I'm a bad mom, but no way!

    Janna
     
  2. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    It is a good idea when the child caring for the baby does not have to share a room, but if they do the other kids get punished also. Not funny at all. I do not blame you.
     
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Janna,
    It does sound annoying! I hope Dylan and easy child don't have to do it someday.
     
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sounds like shaken baby syndrome to me!

    Didnt know you can put a baby in the trunk of you car. Hmmm...maybe I should try that when Keyana is cranky...lol.

    Seriously...I think the point of this exercise is to teach that infants are work.
     
  5. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Janna,

    What a life lesson for difficult child 2.

    What torture for you. :smile: I'm glad the "experiment in terror" is almost complete.

    :smile:
     
  6. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, it sure does NOT make you a bad mom. I wish my difficult child would get a project like this. I think they do it with a bag of flour here. But, I have not heard when it is to happen.
     
  7. givnmegryhr

    givnmegryhr New Member

    I think thats a great idea. Let the fosters do this project with him since she thinks she is so great.LOL. I can see it now. What do you think her reaction will be when she sees him shaking and throwing it? I don't blame you for taking it out of the house. Like that is what you needed right?
     
  8. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Oh, I don't know. Sounds like a success to me. I think he should continue with it. The longer the better. After all, Janna - how many years did you have to put up with him? Maybe he will develop a healthy respect for what he has put you through...

    Marg
     
  9. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    My son had this very same project. Only he can care for it due to the wristband he wore. The first night was ok, baby only woke up to be fed and changed. However...It screamed the next day. Didn't want to be rocked or fed or changed. And the neck was so unstable, if it bent the slightest bit the baby screamed.
    The second night, I returned home from work at 1am. Baby was crying so I peeked down the hall, light was on..good he's up. I took the dog for a walk. I returned about an hour later and baby still screaming. Went and checked. He put the baby in bed with him, cuddling him, husband next to him. Both were sleeping as the baby screamed. Had to rock it most of the night. Maybe an hour or two quiet. Next day difficult child wanted to cut the wristband so we could care for the baby while he went to the movies. Nope. He took baby with him and had to leave when it cried. (difficult child had colic for 4 months when a baby...difficult child was much worse) Since these babies are programed on a real infants schedule, it sounds like a real baby. I was sad, I had a hysterectomy and wanted some cuddling. Baby just cried. It snowed very hard that sunday night, and the only thing I could think of was if school would close we would be stuck with the baby another day!!! My oldest son (24) says he never wants kids. Not after the colic thing 12 years ago, and his babysitting experience (baby would stop crying cause mom left) and now this baby. He even tried to walk it but still cried.
    After he brought it back to school, they did a printout. He took good care of it 98% of the time. but...broke its neck 12 times. To me that would be dead, so don't get the scoring method. He did work hard and was frustrated. Just told him you can't give your baby back. (the master key was sent home incase the baby wouldn't stop and we were frustrated) We made it.
    I like the idea of what they are presenting. Would of been really rough if we had siblings. The dog was stressed! Dog wasn't there when difficult child was an baby.
     
  10. On_Call

    On_Call New Member

    I think the program is a good one, but I may definitely change my mind in a few years when I'm the "grandma" in the scenario!! :wink:
     
  11. Estherfromjerusalem

    Estherfromjerusalem Well-Known Member

    It sounds like a nightmare to me. I have never heard of anything like it before.

    I've heard about lots of innovative educational things before, but this is amazing. It sounds to me like a real imposition on the student's family. The boot of the car sounds like a really good solution.

    Love, Esther
     
  12. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Our difficult child did this project and it was a horror the first two days, but then difficult child found that when she stuffed the baby in the closet, covered it with lots of junk and clothing, she couldn't hear it.

    Unfortunately, the baby had a 'tape' of some sort that recorded the lengths of time it cried and what comforting was attempted, which in this case was none. So difficult child did not get a good grade on this project but she did get a second chance. I used to hold it while I watch tv and worked on the computer. It was kind of cute. lol -

    She just failed health, in which they covered menstruation, conception, birth control and sex ed. I created an outline of information I needed her to research regarding same, gave her three books from which to draw her information and a deadline of one week. She did pretty good on that. I gave her health teacher a copy. It was scary to me that at 17 and as a sexually active senior in HS, she didn't seem to have a clue...despite all the talking I've been doing since she was about 2 years of age! All those books, all those midnight chats for naught. Well, now she knows!
     
  13. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    Janna, my sympathies to your son and your family. YES! My dtrs reminded me more about our experiences with the blasted doll from hades. Actually while oldest difficult child did well with the blasted doll, it triggered off a major destabilization due to lack of sleep and stress and anxiety. Her psychiatrist wrote a nasty letter to our school. Useless, a year later here came easy child home with another doll from hades.

    Something came to my mind concerning the doll. In reality the d oll project is so short term, how COULD it teach anything? The kids KNOW it is a doll, not a living being. and the sleep deprivation is short lived. Quite different than when you have a real live baby of your own......where sleep deprivation goes on and on and on. Teens who deliver babies and continue in school get maternity leave from school, sometimes homebound for a short while and very often they do get help from maybe parents, county etc. They can have someone else do some of the "care" unlike with the doll and the blasted key stuck on your childs wrist. I tried in the nite to help my child "succeed" with this "parenting" thing assignment, I crept into her room, thought I would take my childs wrist and shove that darned key into the babys back and see if I could help so she could get a little sleep. ALAS< LOL, oh my, my kid was sleeping on her wrist, and I could not budge her and could not awaken her ----had it been a REAL child, this gramma might have been able to provide help for my own child with her "child"

    SImilar to the dolls project being done in middle school, in elementary school here our kids have to take care of an egg for a week or so, treat an egg as a baby, carry it around, prevent it from breaking etc, yes a RAW egg.

    For some of the kids the doll thing is fun and cute. For some, especially those who get a difficult "baby" it is pure heck on them. For a child with a diagnosis, it can trigger them, destabilize them, and YES! it can disrupt the whole household. My girls also reminded me, when the doll assignment ended "I" had to write a report about how my child did etc!!!!!!!!!! SOrry but...I resent such things, I finished public school um....over 30 years ago.

    ANd co nsidering our teen preg rate at our school, I highly doubt this assignment helps at all in making any kid rethink anything. Near as I can figure it is just one of those things the kids can someday many many years from now tell their children about. (Oh well you know kid, when I was in school we had to take proper care of this demon doll from hades for a week)
     
  14. Janna

    Janna New Member

    Janet, the point is to teach the kids that it's not easy, you're right. We weren't prepared, though.

    difficult child 2 is in a dream world, as usual, as to how life would be. "That's why I'd have a wife". "That's why I would want my kid bre*st fed, so I wouldn't get stuck feeding it". Guess he never heard of a bre*st pump, but I filled him in LOL!

    He thinks he's going to get married, have a kid, and she's going to do all the work. Ahh, stupid 15 year old.

    As long as he has his own place by then.

    He is really not a good candidate for this task. The "baby" was abused and neglected. He definately failed.

    I felt good putting that baby in the trunk LOL! OMG it wouldn't shut up for anything. Even after feeding, changing and him connecting that bracelet. It was awful. I never want to have babies around me again LMAO!

    Janna
     
  15. Hanging-On

    Hanging-On New Member

    OMG...could you imagine what would happen if someone walked by that car and heard a baby crying. Next thing you know...knock knock..this is the police.....lol.

    Well anyway, I've heard of those teaching baby's. I don't know if I could handle it either. Hugs to you.
     
  16. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    <span style='font-size: 14pt'> <span style="color: #FF0000"> CHILD ABUSE!!!!</span> </span>

    :rofl:
     
  17. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    This reminds me of a seventies sci-fi futuristic doomsday film called "The Edict". I think it had Charlotte Rampling in it. Never saw the film but read the book. In society of the future the world was so overpopulated that an edict was brought in with zero notice - no more babies to be born for thirty years, on pain of death to child and parents. Those currently pregnant when the edict came in had to register, but any future pregnancies had to be terminated. And to cope with the inevitable maternal instinct they made dolls available that would simulate a normal baby. Scary, fascinating book, especially since then a lot of stuff in the book has now come into existence (like the Internet, plus the degree of monitoring now available).

    These dolls sound very similar to the ones in the book. Only worse.

    It doesn't make sense to me that the bracelet couldn't be removed so other people could cuddle the doll. After all, what happens in real life? A new baby gets passed around, grandma moves in to help (sometimes) and we get experience of a healthier extended family all working together to support the new parents.

    Janna, difficult child 2's attitude reminds me of easy child's boyfriend's friend - he fathered a baby girl and his girlfriend, before the baby was born, made it clear that she wasn't going to do anything for it. He already did the cooking, the shopping, the washing and everything while she sat around watching TV. He wanted to have kids and was happy to be an active dad. BUT - after the baby was born, she suddenly decided to get involved (with the baby, at least) and froze him out. She left him when the baby was a few months old and went to another city. He moved to that city as well so he could be near his daughter and was going through all kids of trouble with ex-girlfriend using the baby as blackmail to have power over him. He got another girlfriend, got her pregnant, same thing happened. In three years he had fathered three kids in a desperate attempt to be a father in a stable relationship.
    In some ways this guy is the opposite of your difficult child 2, but in others he's similar - he's basing his actions on false expectations and false premises.

    He needs a doll.

    Marg
     
  18. Janna

    Janna New Member

    Hanging, I had forgotten - I woke up early Sunday morning (5 AM) to do my grocery store run. When I went out to the car, the baby was screaming it's head off LOL! I actually had to move it from my car to SO's truck so I could run to the store, ha!

    This would be a good measure to see how much patience your teen has. I would suspect the tween/teen girls would do better with this than a boy. difficult child 2 just could NOT stand it. I can't say I blame him.

    Janna
     
  19. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    I am not convinced the boys have less patience or tolerance than the girls, nor am I convinced difficult children do less well than PCs.
    My difficult child has proven to me to be far more nurturing than my easy child....and I have se3en a good number of guys do well, and many females do less than well. BUT this assignment simply is not at all realistic in any way shape or form. It is NOT a reliable predictor, nor is it a useful tool.
    My easy child had the useful quality to say hey this is NOT real so heck with it, I will not let this stupid doll upset me, and my difficult child took the assignment serious and personal and it caused her to crash, nevermind difficult child is who "passed" and easy child "failed" ANd my much younger son found it amusing and entertaining and a fun challenge to become engaged in.
    I wish I had thought to shove the monster doll in the car!!!!
     
  20. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">It snowed very hard that sunday night, and the only thing I could think of was if school would close we would be stuck with the baby another day!!! </div></div>

    :rofl:

    I actually think it sounds like a great project. I had heard of it before but I don't think my school has the dolls. At least, neither of my girls had to do that as an assignment for either health or home Easy Child.

    I do have a question, though. Do they carry the "baby" during the school day? I would have a hard time teaching algebra over the din made by screaming baby dolls.

    ~Kathy
     
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