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General Parenting
Social difficulties/loner by choice--what do you do?
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<blockquote data-quote="keista" data-source="post: 468060" data-attributes="member: 11965"><p>I hear ya! DD1 has anxiety, and can seem Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) at times, but is NOT NOT NOT. </p><p></p><p>BUT we can treat your pineapple as if she does have Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). Talk her through each time. Address the anxiety by asking worst case scenario questions, and guiding her to remember how well "last time" went. </p><p></p><p>Set a goal of one playdate per month. If other kids are seeking her out, then she's got a pool to choose from. Hopefully she can find common ground with one of them. </p><p></p><p>Since she's been social in the past, it sounds as if she's getting stuck on getting started. in my opinion this is a severe anxiety issue and I suffer from it myself - in all aspects of life. For example: I decide I need to go grocery shopping. I'll spend two days pondering the pros and cons of going grocery shopping and then finally when there is NOTHING left to eat, I'll force myself to go only because I no longer have a choice in the matter. I do the same thing with cleaning and work and social situations. From the outside, it seems as if I just don't want to, or I'm lazy, but on the inside there is a constant conflict going on in my head - it's exhausting! I know it's more exhausting than actually doing the task I am dreading, but continually get stuck in it.</p><p></p><p>Hopefully she can get "unstuck" and find a middle ground.</p><p></p><p>It's also possible that puberty is playing a huge role in this. Is she developing at the same rate as her peers? This can just add to her existing anxiety and make things more difficult.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="keista, post: 468060, member: 11965"] I hear ya! DD1 has anxiety, and can seem Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) at times, but is NOT NOT NOT. BUT we can treat your pineapple as if she does have Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). Talk her through each time. Address the anxiety by asking worst case scenario questions, and guiding her to remember how well "last time" went. Set a goal of one playdate per month. If other kids are seeking her out, then she's got a pool to choose from. Hopefully she can find common ground with one of them. Since she's been social in the past, it sounds as if she's getting stuck on getting started. in my opinion this is a severe anxiety issue and I suffer from it myself - in all aspects of life. For example: I decide I need to go grocery shopping. I'll spend two days pondering the pros and cons of going grocery shopping and then finally when there is NOTHING left to eat, I'll force myself to go only because I no longer have a choice in the matter. I do the same thing with cleaning and work and social situations. From the outside, it seems as if I just don't want to, or I'm lazy, but on the inside there is a constant conflict going on in my head - it's exhausting! I know it's more exhausting than actually doing the task I am dreading, but continually get stuck in it. Hopefully she can get "unstuck" and find a middle ground. It's also possible that puberty is playing a huge role in this. Is she developing at the same rate as her peers? This can just add to her existing anxiety and make things more difficult. [/QUOTE]
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Social difficulties/loner by choice--what do you do?
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