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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 488011" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>malika, when Sonic was little he would hit, kick, bite, spit. I would carry him to his room and keep him there, even if I had to hold the door shut, until he calmed down. I do not believe that hitting a child who is prone to hitting teaches that child anything more than "Mom hits too!" Also, there is that gray area of "how much can HE control." But you can...you are the adult. Have you ever thought of counseling just for yourself, since you are alone and without help? </p><p></p><p>Now, I must clarify. I would not lock a child in his bedroom, I hold the door shut, so I can monitor him. Sometimes Sonic seemed stronger than me, but I still wouldn't let him out until he was calmer. He seemed to need "alone" time to cool off...it was often successful. In his room, because he could break things, we just kept his bed and stuffed animals that he could throw when frustrated without harming anyone. </p><p></p><p>Although violence is zero tolerance in our house, and I"m sure in yours, J. is so young. Did you ever try empying his room so that he can't harm himself and then making him stay there until he is calmer. I think they escalate around us (or an audience) and are much more apt to be able to self-calm if they are alone. And, yes, son would start out worse at first, banging on the door and screaming for us to let him out. </p><p></p><p>There are no easy answers, unfortunately.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 488011, member: 1550"] malika, when Sonic was little he would hit, kick, bite, spit. I would carry him to his room and keep him there, even if I had to hold the door shut, until he calmed down. I do not believe that hitting a child who is prone to hitting teaches that child anything more than "Mom hits too!" Also, there is that gray area of "how much can HE control." But you can...you are the adult. Have you ever thought of counseling just for yourself, since you are alone and without help? Now, I must clarify. I would not lock a child in his bedroom, I hold the door shut, so I can monitor him. Sometimes Sonic seemed stronger than me, but I still wouldn't let him out until he was calmer. He seemed to need "alone" time to cool off...it was often successful. In his room, because he could break things, we just kept his bed and stuffed animals that he could throw when frustrated without harming anyone. Although violence is zero tolerance in our house, and I"m sure in yours, J. is so young. Did you ever try empying his room so that he can't harm himself and then making him stay there until he is calmer. I think they escalate around us (or an audience) and are much more apt to be able to self-calm if they are alone. And, yes, son would start out worse at first, banging on the door and screaming for us to let him out. There are no easy answers, unfortunately. [/QUOTE]
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