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<blockquote data-quote="Abbey" data-source="post: 151033" data-attributes="member: 179"><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="font-size: 10px">My mom sent this to me. I RARELY pass on stuff like this, but I found it kind of funny. Mom, at 71, has found the *internet.* I get tons of stuff from her everyday now.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">_______________________</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Can you cry under water?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">How important does a person have to be before they are considered</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">assassinated instead of just murdered?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'.. But it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why does a round pizza come in a square box?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">What disease did cured ham actually have?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME ****, why didn't he just buy dinner? </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why did you just try singing the two songs above?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 15px">Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Abbey, post: 151033, member: 179"] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][SIZE=2]My mom sent this to me. I RARELY pass on stuff like this, but I found it kind of funny. Mom, at 71, has found the *internet.* I get tons of stuff from her everyday now.[/SIZE] _______________________ Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'.. But it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to? Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? What disease did cured ham actually have? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway. Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural? Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ? If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME ****, why didn't he just buy dinner? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above? Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt? Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?[/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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