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General Parenting
Some Improvement, I Think
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 401717" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>A way to help him deal with those stuck thoughts - explore them together. "OK, you think you will fail. So if you fail, what will happen? Your teacher knows what you are capable of, so you will probably get an assessment mark. But let's say you won't get a passing assessment mark either. What would happen then? Why don't you ask your teacher if you're not sure. What is the absolute worst that can happen? The sun will still come up. You will still be alive, with a roof over your head and food in your belly. You will have results you can look at to learn from, so the next time you would do better because you would have learned where you went wrong."</p><p></p><p>The nest thing, after he's looked failure square in the face, is to then say, "Now, that is the worst case scenario. Anything from there is a bonus. Whatever you manage to study now, will help. Any improvement in your exam technique, will help a great deal. But it will be OK to not get full marks. If you Do get full marks it means the exam was not a good test of your capability, because it did not fully explore the limits of what you can do. It's important for a test to find those limits, because it's only then that teachers can know what direction to take your learning. That is one of the main purposes of exams."</p><p></p><p>He needs to have this understanding in his head, and to do this he needs to be able to face his fears and explore their possible consequences.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 401717, member: 1991"] A way to help him deal with those stuck thoughts - explore them together. "OK, you think you will fail. So if you fail, what will happen? Your teacher knows what you are capable of, so you will probably get an assessment mark. But let's say you won't get a passing assessment mark either. What would happen then? Why don't you ask your teacher if you're not sure. What is the absolute worst that can happen? The sun will still come up. You will still be alive, with a roof over your head and food in your belly. You will have results you can look at to learn from, so the next time you would do better because you would have learned where you went wrong." The nest thing, after he's looked failure square in the face, is to then say, "Now, that is the worst case scenario. Anything from there is a bonus. Whatever you manage to study now, will help. Any improvement in your exam technique, will help a great deal. But it will be OK to not get full marks. If you Do get full marks it means the exam was not a good test of your capability, because it did not fully explore the limits of what you can do. It's important for a test to find those limits, because it's only then that teachers can know what direction to take your learning. That is one of the main purposes of exams." He needs to have this understanding in his head, and to do this he needs to be able to face his fears and explore their possible consequences. Marg [/QUOTE]
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