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Something I have never understood about my difficult children.
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 461403"><p>Yes totally and completely familiar on all counts!!!</p><p></p><p>I will say I think this happens on a spectrum. I have one very much difficult child son and a very much easy child daughter who is most of the time lovely, but is also a teenager.</p><p></p><p>So I don't get really really mad at my daughter very often, because she doesnt' give me much reason to and she has never done anything on the order of the things my son has... of course when really bad stuff happens with him I end up very calm.... have to deal with it or the system or whatever. So when he is in major trouble I don't yell I deal.</p><p></p><p>So a couple of times I have gotten really mad at her and yelled or whatever. I had good reason.... but when I get really raging mad I think she is shocked and then she gets mad at me!! One time she was mad because I don't get mad at her brother for all the stuff he has done (not true) or she will just stop talking to me. I feel kind of like you do... wait a minute she was in the wrong and am I not allowed to ever express my anger at her??? So I think for her she reacts to the level of my anger and feels the level of it is not justified given the infraction. On that score she is usually right...... OK But the easy child part of her does eventually recognize her part in it all.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child on the other hand has always been very sensitive Occupational Therapist (OT) my anger and yes he would always turn it around on me... and not always get his part. Much harder to deal with.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 461403"] Yes totally and completely familiar on all counts!!! I will say I think this happens on a spectrum. I have one very much difficult child son and a very much easy child daughter who is most of the time lovely, but is also a teenager. So I don't get really really mad at my daughter very often, because she doesnt' give me much reason to and she has never done anything on the order of the things my son has... of course when really bad stuff happens with him I end up very calm.... have to deal with it or the system or whatever. So when he is in major trouble I don't yell I deal. So a couple of times I have gotten really mad at her and yelled or whatever. I had good reason.... but when I get really raging mad I think she is shocked and then she gets mad at me!! One time she was mad because I don't get mad at her brother for all the stuff he has done (not true) or she will just stop talking to me. I feel kind of like you do... wait a minute she was in the wrong and am I not allowed to ever express my anger at her??? So I think for her she reacts to the level of my anger and feels the level of it is not justified given the infraction. On that score she is usually right...... OK But the easy child part of her does eventually recognize her part in it all. My difficult child on the other hand has always been very sensitive Occupational Therapist (OT) my anger and yes he would always turn it around on me... and not always get his part. Much harder to deal with. TL [/QUOTE]
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Something I have never understood about my difficult children.
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