Hi all. Since difficult child was arrested on Christmas Day, we've had a flurry of activity (some pleasant, some not, some confusing). The Not Pleasant ---- After difficult child's arrest Christmas morning, we began receiving private messages on Facebook (they obviously looked me up because we're not "friended"). One, in particular, urged me to pay difficult child's bail (which court originally decreed no bail allowed). We made it clear from difficult child's first police incident (age 10?) that we would not pay his bail at any time. No need to get arrested, so no need for bail. We have never paid it (despite multiple arrests) and never will. difficult child knows this. But his friends do not. Well...........now they do. Case closed. The Confusing ----- Not clear (as it keeps changing), but apparently difficult child has been released from jail (some technicality?). But the case is still open and under investigation. No clue where he is or if he has an ankle monitor, etc. No clue what any of it means or where it goes from here. Home alarm intact. The Pleasant ----- husband and I took an impromptu road trip to talk and to clear our heads. husband and I road trip so very well together! Change of scenery always helps my head (when it's muddled) and my heart (when it's weary). And it did help. Then we had impromptu houseguests (traveling from out of state) and enjoyed visiting with them for a while. You know.........people who obey the law, show up for work, and are so very warm, loving and fun! In difficult child-dom, we feel it's important to fill our lives with as much of that as possible.......warm, loving and fun! Everyone deserves that! Our Conclusion ------ On our road trip, husband and I had hours to talk. husband is the best person I know....his entire being overflows with "warm, loving, and fun". Really. I can see the toll difficult child takes on him. I already know the toll difficult child takes on me. So, we have opted to "step back" and have no contact with difficult child for however long we parents need for our health and happiness. Sometimes difficult child takes too big of a toll. Fact. So we move ahead into our best version possible at this time of Radical Acceptance. Knowing that Radical Acceptance sometimes means STEPPING BACK......quietly, peacefully, prayerfully, willingly, compassionately, wisely. Oh, and one last thing............. GO HAWKS! (NFL postseason is upon us!) Watched the last game all decked out in my new Seahawks jersey (Russell Wilson, of course) and loved it!