My 19 year old son has been getting into trouble off and on for the past four years. His father and I divorced about four years ago as well. He has been arrested for minor in possession, breaking and entering, and DWI. The last charge was after he turned 18. Now, he is a college student at a local university -- he is very smart and has skated through school without trying very hard. Just before he started college, he got kicked out of his dad's house for not obeying the curfew and general disrespect. His grandmother owns apartments near the college campus, and she is letting him stay in one for very cheap. And, his father and I agreed to help him pay for the apartment as long as he kept his scholarship and got a part-time job. So far, no part-time job. He also has no transportation due to the DWI. For his 19th birthday, I actually paid for the DWI training and signed him up. Now, he has been arrested for possession of pot and pot paraphernalia. I am at my wits' end. I don't even know what to say to him anymore. I cannot believe he is doing this when he has such a bright future ahead of him -- he's smart, he has a full scholarship, and he has parents and grandparents who are helping him. So far, the help has not really helped him at all. So now, I believe that his father and I are going to have to just stop helping. Stop paying for the apartment. Could I still give him groceries?? I don't know. He could be in jail tomorrow after the sentencing. I don't think we should pay for his fines -- which will be either $1000 or $2000 -- not sure yet. Should I withdraw support and just let him go to jail? I find that so very hard to do. Yet, he doesn't seem to be able to make any good decisions. Since he got the apartment, he has had multiple friends over, been drinking (I don't know how much, but I know he has been), and of course, smoking a lot of pot. I don't even know what his grades are, but he says he has been going to class and doing well. He signed up for a second course, even. So I think he does want to continue college. What can I say to him? What can I do?