DazedandConfused
Well-Known Member
I just get home from work; Daughter is gone to school. I have no idea where Son is. Two times last week he doesn't come home until way after dark. Lots of explaining why he needs to be home before it's completely dark and that I worry. What's his response? "Can't you see that I am okay?" (said in a snotty voice). I explain that for the two and a half hours that it is dark I do not know that. Does it again the next night. Result: grounded-kinda. He's been grounded for so long and it's doesn't seem to get through to him.
My Mom is still very angry at him for his treatment of me. He's (or was anyway) very close to her. They would take walks and have long talks. She finally witnessed him in his full nasty, rude, and raging glory, and she was so upset. She's trying to support me. I don't know. She says she just can't stand that he's sweet as pie to her and then so horrible at home. She wants him to change the way he acts at home before he's back in her life again like before. I think she's going to have a very long wait. We had a long phone conversation and I told her that it may be a very high price for both of them to pay.
The Major Bone of Contention: The cell phone.
Just a short recap. I got him a cell phone as an early Xmas present. Three weeks later I took it away (actually a wrenched it from his hands and hurled it to the floor) and told him he needed to straighten up before he would get it back. As you can probably guess, it has made no difference other than him harping, threaten, and cry, to get it back. This is nearly everyday day. Sometimes several times a day.
I've explained and explained and explained. His response: "It's mine and I'm going to report you to the police". So, let him right? I don't know about you, but NOBODY is going to call the police to report me from a phone that I PAY FOR! No how,no way. Go some where else. Thing is, nobody will let him.
I could write a book of our daily battles. husband is gone working most of the time and his job is not exactly secure due to the economy. Neither is mine due to state education budget cuts. So, I have that stress. I'm in school carrying 14 units and I'M NOT GIVING THAT UP! It's the only thing I do only for me and the only thing that will stop me from finishing is MY DEATH. I'm nearly at the halfway point and though I love my children, and want what is best for them and they fight me tooth and nail each step of the way but school is non-negotiable.
Anyway I will now dear reader use this opportunity to segue to our villain's latest escapade: He's going to take me to court. That's right. Sue. Why? Cell phone!
At this point, a rational person would think, "Give the kid the cell phone and have some piece!". I do like to THINK I'm rational, and I could probably play one on TV, I'm refuse to pay for a cell phone for someone who calls me a "retard". Or, says I'm stupid, or whatever nasty little name he has for me.
So, today I get home from work and I'm not home even ten minutes when there is a banging on the screen door. I ask who it is (though, I know it's probably Son aka: The Villain) and he says "It's Son". I go to answer the door and there he is with a police officer standing behind him.
(I should probably let you know that I have been living with the threat of arrest for taking "Son's" cell phone for months. Because I refuse to allow him to use our house phone, he told me last night after another epic battle he was going to go to the police station and "report" me)
Anyway....
I ask Son (villain) very calmly why do I have the police at my door? The cop says, "Yeah, go ahead and tell her". Long story short, Son made good on his threat about going to the police station. He apparently waited over an hour to talk to an officer (which was one reason I didn't want him bothering the police, they are so busy and understaffed in our town). Anyway, Son told the officer he wanted me arrested and put in jail for 30 days. The officer was very nice and asked about mental health and medications. I tried to give the short version of the last five or six years. He did give Son a very stern talking to, but it didn't seem to phase him much. Apparently, they talked about court and I don't think that the officer intended to give Son the idea to take me to court. Which, mind you, is twenty five miles away. It's night time and even after me and his Dad telling him it's closed, he's going down there via the bus.
So, here I am. I've gotten some recommendations regarding new psychiatrists. Our old/new one has taken a leave of absence. I'm just not sure what do. Therapy? I don't think that's going to help. He will just argue. A placement? I don't know. I just don't know. He doesn't get into trouble other than make our lives at home hades. Most of it is now directed at me. He'll argue even when it's obvious he's wrong.
He got an infected toe. He decided to make the treatment a power struggle. So what happens? It gets worse. I tell him it's infected and it need to be treated properly. He argues back and forth: "no, it's not" over and over to my "yes, it is".
I just don't even want to think of how miserable my life is going to be over the next four or fives year is going to be.
My Mom is still very angry at him for his treatment of me. He's (or was anyway) very close to her. They would take walks and have long talks. She finally witnessed him in his full nasty, rude, and raging glory, and she was so upset. She's trying to support me. I don't know. She says she just can't stand that he's sweet as pie to her and then so horrible at home. She wants him to change the way he acts at home before he's back in her life again like before. I think she's going to have a very long wait. We had a long phone conversation and I told her that it may be a very high price for both of them to pay.
The Major Bone of Contention: The cell phone.
Just a short recap. I got him a cell phone as an early Xmas present. Three weeks later I took it away (actually a wrenched it from his hands and hurled it to the floor) and told him he needed to straighten up before he would get it back. As you can probably guess, it has made no difference other than him harping, threaten, and cry, to get it back. This is nearly everyday day. Sometimes several times a day.
I've explained and explained and explained. His response: "It's mine and I'm going to report you to the police". So, let him right? I don't know about you, but NOBODY is going to call the police to report me from a phone that I PAY FOR! No how,no way. Go some where else. Thing is, nobody will let him.
I could write a book of our daily battles. husband is gone working most of the time and his job is not exactly secure due to the economy. Neither is mine due to state education budget cuts. So, I have that stress. I'm in school carrying 14 units and I'M NOT GIVING THAT UP! It's the only thing I do only for me and the only thing that will stop me from finishing is MY DEATH. I'm nearly at the halfway point and though I love my children, and want what is best for them and they fight me tooth and nail each step of the way but school is non-negotiable.
Anyway I will now dear reader use this opportunity to segue to our villain's latest escapade: He's going to take me to court. That's right. Sue. Why? Cell phone!
At this point, a rational person would think, "Give the kid the cell phone and have some piece!". I do like to THINK I'm rational, and I could probably play one on TV, I'm refuse to pay for a cell phone for someone who calls me a "retard". Or, says I'm stupid, or whatever nasty little name he has for me.
So, today I get home from work and I'm not home even ten minutes when there is a banging on the screen door. I ask who it is (though, I know it's probably Son aka: The Villain) and he says "It's Son". I go to answer the door and there he is with a police officer standing behind him.
(I should probably let you know that I have been living with the threat of arrest for taking "Son's" cell phone for months. Because I refuse to allow him to use our house phone, he told me last night after another epic battle he was going to go to the police station and "report" me)
Anyway....
I ask Son (villain) very calmly why do I have the police at my door? The cop says, "Yeah, go ahead and tell her". Long story short, Son made good on his threat about going to the police station. He apparently waited over an hour to talk to an officer (which was one reason I didn't want him bothering the police, they are so busy and understaffed in our town). Anyway, Son told the officer he wanted me arrested and put in jail for 30 days. The officer was very nice and asked about mental health and medications. I tried to give the short version of the last five or six years. He did give Son a very stern talking to, but it didn't seem to phase him much. Apparently, they talked about court and I don't think that the officer intended to give Son the idea to take me to court. Which, mind you, is twenty five miles away. It's night time and even after me and his Dad telling him it's closed, he's going down there via the bus.
So, here I am. I've gotten some recommendations regarding new psychiatrists. Our old/new one has taken a leave of absence. I'm just not sure what do. Therapy? I don't think that's going to help. He will just argue. A placement? I don't know. I just don't know. He doesn't get into trouble other than make our lives at home hades. Most of it is now directed at me. He'll argue even when it's obvious he's wrong.
He got an infected toe. He decided to make the treatment a power struggle. So what happens? It gets worse. I tell him it's infected and it need to be treated properly. He argues back and forth: "no, it's not" over and over to my "yes, it is".
I just don't even want to think of how miserable my life is going to be over the next four or fives year is going to be.
Too bad the cop NOT arresting you hasn't clued him in that you are allowed to confiscate his phone.
!
