Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Son holds knife to wrist
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 485547" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Ah yes......King Baby.........and someday? With age comes wisdome and your village is missing their idiot.....Thank God. Many of those things you described <u><em><strong>were</strong></em></u> Dude. Not so much anymore - once he had to experience WHY those things happened in REAL LIFE - and handle the situations all on his own? His tolerance grew, his patience increased for not only others but himself and he started to look at OTHER younger angry men in a different light thinking - (literally) OMG Dude - calm down, don't be like that and had his (HOLY SMOKES) I sound like my therapist moment. THAT was a real eye opener. Once he had to grow a patience and a tolerance? Things all of a sudden became a little more understandable and tolerant to him instead of someone rushing in to FIX the situation so he wouldn't ERUPT....it was like the world said - OH you're unhappy about standing in line at the hospital for your bee stings (12 wasp stings to the face to be exact) - then go home because we have gunshot victims, and heart attack victims, and a baby with fever - and GUESS WHERE YOU get in line at boy? - So he left, got worse and HAD to go back and WAIT.HIS.TURN. WITH.HIS.MOUTH.SHUT.TO.BE.SEEN. Quite a revelation for a difficult child who was used to blowing up and getting his way. </p><p></p><p>LIFE teaches difficult child's things that sometimes sadly, an excellent Mother can not. - (huh I just wrote that and think it's good - lol) - </p><p></p><p></p><p>You are a good Mother-------Tell yourself that every morning. I'm saying it to you right now. And he's not a BAD kid -----he just has this 'ships that pass in the night' mentality about some life lessons.....he'll be okay. The alternative that scares ALL of us is - IF I turn him out? He will die. And I don't think there is a Mother here who hasn't thought about it that way. WHO hasn't 'thought - OMG he can't deal with the world, without MY guidance and protection he will die. That's fair to think at first, but how fair is it to keep a man (20, 21) in your care...and NOT allow him to get 'hit' by life...and end up like my x? It is a chance....but the outcome to me is death either way - I don't think my ex's life is a life. It's a miserable existance and if his Mother was alive still? HER life is a miserable existance watching him and listening to him demand things for 50 years plus from her and manipulate her. In that instance it would be better if he had died and she had been able to live. in my humble opinion. Being drunk, addicted to drugs and existing for 50 years like that isn't a life. So in my humble opinion it was a hard judgement call but we said ----Okay - GO....and pushed him out and prayed that he would be SO sickened by the ways of the world he would avoid the crime, the drugs, the booze, and the things that we raised him to NOT be like that he so seemed to WANT to be like.....and he got a dose of it in spades out on the streets. Our son wasnt' 'street' smart either - thought he was......sure he thought he was....and he made it. It wasn't easy to hear about dumpster diving for food. IT MADE ME VOMIT. It wasn't easy to hear "me and my dog are sleeping under a bridge..." I didn't sleep....I was worried sick. All of me wanted to save him...drive there and find him numerous times - but THOSE WERE HIS CHOICES. He had to find his way out - his own solutions. In all this madness? He did. It's not exactly what he wanted - but then that makes him strive for more doesn't it? WOrk harder....set goals. NOW he has goals. Instead of sitting around MY house complaining ---about duplex cremes and NOT oreos.......he's worried about having a coat. Imagine that. Before he had five or six coats and didn't "LIKE" any of them. </p><p></p><p>SO even their perspectives and values change.......if you allow the world to change them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 485547, member: 4964"] Ah yes......King Baby.........and someday? With age comes wisdome and your village is missing their idiot.....Thank God. Many of those things you described [U][I][B]were[/B][/I][/U] Dude. Not so much anymore - once he had to experience WHY those things happened in REAL LIFE - and handle the situations all on his own? His tolerance grew, his patience increased for not only others but himself and he started to look at OTHER younger angry men in a different light thinking - (literally) OMG Dude - calm down, don't be like that and had his (HOLY SMOKES) I sound like my therapist moment. THAT was a real eye opener. Once he had to grow a patience and a tolerance? Things all of a sudden became a little more understandable and tolerant to him instead of someone rushing in to FIX the situation so he wouldn't ERUPT....it was like the world said - OH you're unhappy about standing in line at the hospital for your bee stings (12 wasp stings to the face to be exact) - then go home because we have gunshot victims, and heart attack victims, and a baby with fever - and GUESS WHERE YOU get in line at boy? - So he left, got worse and HAD to go back and WAIT.HIS.TURN. WITH.HIS.MOUTH.SHUT.TO.BE.SEEN. Quite a revelation for a difficult child who was used to blowing up and getting his way. LIFE teaches difficult child's things that sometimes sadly, an excellent Mother can not. - (huh I just wrote that and think it's good - lol) - You are a good Mother-------Tell yourself that every morning. I'm saying it to you right now. And he's not a BAD kid -----he just has this 'ships that pass in the night' mentality about some life lessons.....he'll be okay. The alternative that scares ALL of us is - IF I turn him out? He will die. And I don't think there is a Mother here who hasn't thought about it that way. WHO hasn't 'thought - OMG he can't deal with the world, without MY guidance and protection he will die. That's fair to think at first, but how fair is it to keep a man (20, 21) in your care...and NOT allow him to get 'hit' by life...and end up like my x? It is a chance....but the outcome to me is death either way - I don't think my ex's life is a life. It's a miserable existance and if his Mother was alive still? HER life is a miserable existance watching him and listening to him demand things for 50 years plus from her and manipulate her. In that instance it would be better if he had died and she had been able to live. in my humble opinion. Being drunk, addicted to drugs and existing for 50 years like that isn't a life. So in my humble opinion it was a hard judgement call but we said ----Okay - GO....and pushed him out and prayed that he would be SO sickened by the ways of the world he would avoid the crime, the drugs, the booze, and the things that we raised him to NOT be like that he so seemed to WANT to be like.....and he got a dose of it in spades out on the streets. Our son wasnt' 'street' smart either - thought he was......sure he thought he was....and he made it. It wasn't easy to hear about dumpster diving for food. IT MADE ME VOMIT. It wasn't easy to hear "me and my dog are sleeping under a bridge..." I didn't sleep....I was worried sick. All of me wanted to save him...drive there and find him numerous times - but THOSE WERE HIS CHOICES. He had to find his way out - his own solutions. In all this madness? He did. It's not exactly what he wanted - but then that makes him strive for more doesn't it? WOrk harder....set goals. NOW he has goals. Instead of sitting around MY house complaining ---about duplex cremes and NOT oreos.......he's worried about having a coat. Imagine that. Before he had five or six coats and didn't "LIKE" any of them. SO even their perspectives and values change.......if you allow the world to change them. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Son holds knife to wrist
Top