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Son in jail nightmare continues
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 441380" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I had a drug addicted daughter who quit. She would be very unsympathetic to your son. Mental illness/Add or not, he did not have to become a drug addict. He made his choices and armed robbery is VERY serious. Not everyone who has issues comes to this and at his age I believe he has to own it and he is suffering natural consequences. </p><p></p><p>My daughter quit because she saw a friend with track marks up and down her arm and suddenly thought, "OMG! That will be me." She was sent to Illinois, out of state, to start fresh and not be around her (cough, cough) friends. She never used again. She often says that the best thing we did was to make her leave. For a long time she had no car and had to start over...no friends either. She got a job at Subway and walked to work and back and finally became a manager. Eventually she got an old car and met a nice boy and has been clean for eight years. </p><p></p><p>Feeling sorry for your son in my opinion will not help him. And if he isn't committed to quitting drugs even a diagnosis won't help him because he will have to take drugs for that on top of probably still using recreational drugs. At his age, it has got to come from him. All the help in the world won't do any good unless he is ready to fight hard and alone for his sobriety. It is a journey you must take alone.</p><p></p><p>But, as my daughter did it, it CAN be done. It is done all the time. Keep the faith and be there for him, but don't destroy your own lives and those of the rest of your family. And don't feel sorry for him because he may have ADD. How many people have ADD and don't end up in jail? This jail time may scare him straight.</p><p></p><p>Hugs and be sure to take care of yourself. You can not spend your entire life obsessed with a grown child. It won't help him and it will hurt you and those who love you as well.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 441380, member: 1550"] I had a drug addicted daughter who quit. She would be very unsympathetic to your son. Mental illness/Add or not, he did not have to become a drug addict. He made his choices and armed robbery is VERY serious. Not everyone who has issues comes to this and at his age I believe he has to own it and he is suffering natural consequences. My daughter quit because she saw a friend with track marks up and down her arm and suddenly thought, "OMG! That will be me." She was sent to Illinois, out of state, to start fresh and not be around her (cough, cough) friends. She never used again. She often says that the best thing we did was to make her leave. For a long time she had no car and had to start over...no friends either. She got a job at Subway and walked to work and back and finally became a manager. Eventually she got an old car and met a nice boy and has been clean for eight years. Feeling sorry for your son in my opinion will not help him. And if he isn't committed to quitting drugs even a diagnosis won't help him because he will have to take drugs for that on top of probably still using recreational drugs. At his age, it has got to come from him. All the help in the world won't do any good unless he is ready to fight hard and alone for his sobriety. It is a journey you must take alone. But, as my daughter did it, it CAN be done. It is done all the time. Keep the faith and be there for him, but don't destroy your own lives and those of the rest of your family. And don't feel sorry for him because he may have ADD. How many people have ADD and don't end up in jail? This jail time may scare him straight. Hugs and be sure to take care of yourself. You can not spend your entire life obsessed with a grown child. It won't help him and it will hurt you and those who love you as well. [/QUOTE]
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