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Son in jail nightmare continues
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 445910" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>sick and tired.....</p><p></p><p>Hi there - </p><p></p><p>Just FYI - </p><p></p><p>THey are not allowed to receive stamps and envelopes in jail. Your letter will most likely either get returned to you OR be opened read, and either decided to be dumped or have the envelope and stamp taken out because you could pass illegal "blotter" or "powder'' type drugs to him. </p><p></p><p>So don't expect him to write back - If he is to write back? He will have to have money in his commisary and buy a stamp and envelope or trade in prison /jail for it. Snacks, other favors etc...are used for in jail letters with the postage ON the envelope already they don't allow inmates to have stamps. </p><p></p><p>Second of all - YOu have to be on his LIST in order for him to receive mail. And vice versa. If you aren't on his mailing list the jail house will not allow you to send him anything. Didn't know if you knew this or not. I know all of this is new to you, so I didn't want you to be disappointed. Most jail houses have ruiles that they post on a web site OR a handbook that you can get if you go during visiting hours. ALso when you go to visiting hours? Don't wear jewelry or buckles - etc. It slows down the process of getting in. When we went? YOu had to be patted down in the first doors, then wanded, then go through three metal detectors, and then into a locker room with a female guard for me ---change clothes into scrub type clothes and then wait on your inmate to come see you. It was really intense, but this was a state prison. They didn't play. The tables were wide, no touching, no whispering...no hugging. (adult prison) - Department of Juvenile Justice for the kids was almost as bad except we never had to change clothes - and we were allowed to hug when we left. </p><p></p><p>You've gotten a lot of great ideas here - I really hope you take my suggestion of going to a Cocaine Anonymous meeting and sitting in with some of the former addicts and listen to them talk. Narcanon is a good one too - but I got a lot MORE out of going to the meetings that had former and current drug abusers and how they viewed US (parents, wives, etc) and our enabling what it meant to them, how we were a joke...and not helping, what they wished we had done, it was really and eye opener for me and helped me TO DETACH strongly from my ex) The only way I got away was listening to those people tell their stories about what fools they thought we were. We being people that stay and continue to help them. Made me angry enough to leave. </p><p></p><p>Stay strong.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 445910, member: 4964"] sick and tired..... Hi there - Just FYI - THey are not allowed to receive stamps and envelopes in jail. Your letter will most likely either get returned to you OR be opened read, and either decided to be dumped or have the envelope and stamp taken out because you could pass illegal "blotter" or "powder'' type drugs to him. So don't expect him to write back - If he is to write back? He will have to have money in his commisary and buy a stamp and envelope or trade in prison /jail for it. Snacks, other favors etc...are used for in jail letters with the postage ON the envelope already they don't allow inmates to have stamps. Second of all - YOu have to be on his LIST in order for him to receive mail. And vice versa. If you aren't on his mailing list the jail house will not allow you to send him anything. Didn't know if you knew this or not. I know all of this is new to you, so I didn't want you to be disappointed. Most jail houses have ruiles that they post on a web site OR a handbook that you can get if you go during visiting hours. ALso when you go to visiting hours? Don't wear jewelry or buckles - etc. It slows down the process of getting in. When we went? YOu had to be patted down in the first doors, then wanded, then go through three metal detectors, and then into a locker room with a female guard for me ---change clothes into scrub type clothes and then wait on your inmate to come see you. It was really intense, but this was a state prison. They didn't play. The tables were wide, no touching, no whispering...no hugging. (adult prison) - Department of Juvenile Justice for the kids was almost as bad except we never had to change clothes - and we were allowed to hug when we left. You've gotten a lot of great ideas here - I really hope you take my suggestion of going to a Cocaine Anonymous meeting and sitting in with some of the former addicts and listen to them talk. Narcanon is a good one too - but I got a lot MORE out of going to the meetings that had former and current drug abusers and how they viewed US (parents, wives, etc) and our enabling what it meant to them, how we were a joke...and not helping, what they wished we had done, it was really and eye opener for me and helped me TO DETACH strongly from my ex) The only way I got away was listening to those people tell their stories about what fools they thought we were. We being people that stay and continue to help them. Made me angry enough to leave. Stay strong. [/QUOTE]
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