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Son is sick, missed school. Not sure what to make of it.
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 262803" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Kjs, what you describe is how difficult child 3 was presenting, for several years on and off. This is a kid who wanted to go to school, who enjoyed learning, liked his teachers (even when they were horrible to him), would have kids make friends with him who had previously been his enemies (and then continue to be mean to him, but difficult child 3 wouldn't "dob" because "they say they're my friends, mum!").</p><p></p><p>He would be sick with vomiting, nausea, his face would be ashen grey and he would be running a low-grade fever. But he would want to go to school.</p><p></p><p>And after a year of investigation, missing school more than half the time and me unofficially home-schooling him while the school did their best to protect me from the truant office - we excused all physical causes and finally had to accept that yes, severe anxiety CAN be this bad.</p><p></p><p>difficult child 3 was NOT buging this on, this was genuinely a sick boy. He had no idea that anxiety alone was the explanation, he wasn't 'talking it up' or in any way making a fuss to get out of going to school. I've since seen him anxious like this while we were on holidays, but we were somewhere that made him afraid for our safety and even though he knew intellectually that we were safe, his anxiety gave him the same symptoms. He was convinced it was more than anxiety, that he was in fact dying and we needed to get him to a doctor. But as we left the place and drove away, he began to feel magically better. </p><p></p><p>What I suggest - keep a diary on his symptoms and do persist in getting them investigated. We had difficult child 3 checked out for abdominal problems (including possible appendicitis) with ultrasound, blood tests (looking at blood count for hints of possible infections; liver function tests; thyroid tests; even leukemia as a possibility), finally checking him out for Helicobacter infection and possible stomach ulcer. All negative. At last a doctor looked at me and said, "NOW will you accept that this is anxiety?"</p><p></p><p>I had doctors suggest earlier that "kids with autism often get symptoms like this; you have to accept that it's just a facet of his autism." I got angry with this because symptoms like this were severely hampering difficult child 3's life, his education and other aspects of day to day stuff. And the doctor gave us no suggestions as to how to try to deal with the problem. "Live with it" is no help. Cognitive behaviour therapy - now THAT can help.</p><p></p><p>Once we had made sure there wasn't an underlyingphysical disorder, we booked difficult child 3 in for CBT. The psychgologist we had was really good, she helped difficult child 3 a lot but there were still limitations because he was still so young and didn't have asmuch understandfing and self-awareness as she would have liked. We need occasional refresher courses in relaxation and breathing therapy. We've found the Zen Yoga on the Wii Fit is helpful too. You can find help in surprising places!</p><p></p><p>So check out when you notice symptoms surfacing, and when you notice that he seems OK. We would sometimes find symptoms suddenly turning up even while we were in school holiday time, but the more I observed the more I realised - there had been aconnection with school in some way. We might have been driving past the school, then five or ten minutes later, difficult child 3 suddenly went ghastly white and threw up. One day in the holidays he said to me out of the blue, "This year at school I won't let the bullies upset me, I'll just walk away and go tell a teacher."</p><p>Ten minutes later he was throwing up again.</p><p></p><p>Or he would be fine over the weekend, talking enthusiastically about seeing his friend at school next day, then he would get up, get dressed for school, be chattering excitedly about school - then half an hour before the bus was due, he was throwing up again.</p><p></p><p>On days when I insisted he go, telling him he would be fine (or days when I dosed him with paracetamol to bring the fever down so he could pass as well enough for school) I would get phone calls asking me to come get him, he had already been vomiting several times. On days when I couldn't come get him he would spend the day in the sick bay, vomiting repeatedly. Or maybe not vomiting in sick bay, but any time he wassent to his class he was vomiting again.</p><p></p><p>One teacher said, "I've watched him, he's actually trying to make himself sick," but I think it was her frustration with him, more than anything else. He simply hasn't got the guile to do this.</p><p></p><p>Good luck with getting to the bottom of this. I hope, if there is a physical cause, you can find it out sooner rather than later.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 262803, member: 1991"] Kjs, what you describe is how difficult child 3 was presenting, for several years on and off. This is a kid who wanted to go to school, who enjoyed learning, liked his teachers (even when they were horrible to him), would have kids make friends with him who had previously been his enemies (and then continue to be mean to him, but difficult child 3 wouldn't "dob" because "they say they're my friends, mum!"). He would be sick with vomiting, nausea, his face would be ashen grey and he would be running a low-grade fever. But he would want to go to school. And after a year of investigation, missing school more than half the time and me unofficially home-schooling him while the school did their best to protect me from the truant office - we excused all physical causes and finally had to accept that yes, severe anxiety CAN be this bad. difficult child 3 was NOT buging this on, this was genuinely a sick boy. He had no idea that anxiety alone was the explanation, he wasn't 'talking it up' or in any way making a fuss to get out of going to school. I've since seen him anxious like this while we were on holidays, but we were somewhere that made him afraid for our safety and even though he knew intellectually that we were safe, his anxiety gave him the same symptoms. He was convinced it was more than anxiety, that he was in fact dying and we needed to get him to a doctor. But as we left the place and drove away, he began to feel magically better. What I suggest - keep a diary on his symptoms and do persist in getting them investigated. We had difficult child 3 checked out for abdominal problems (including possible appendicitis) with ultrasound, blood tests (looking at blood count for hints of possible infections; liver function tests; thyroid tests; even leukemia as a possibility), finally checking him out for Helicobacter infection and possible stomach ulcer. All negative. At last a doctor looked at me and said, "NOW will you accept that this is anxiety?" I had doctors suggest earlier that "kids with autism often get symptoms like this; you have to accept that it's just a facet of his autism." I got angry with this because symptoms like this were severely hampering difficult child 3's life, his education and other aspects of day to day stuff. And the doctor gave us no suggestions as to how to try to deal with the problem. "Live with it" is no help. Cognitive behaviour therapy - now THAT can help. Once we had made sure there wasn't an underlyingphysical disorder, we booked difficult child 3 in for CBT. The psychgologist we had was really good, she helped difficult child 3 a lot but there were still limitations because he was still so young and didn't have asmuch understandfing and self-awareness as she would have liked. We need occasional refresher courses in relaxation and breathing therapy. We've found the Zen Yoga on the Wii Fit is helpful too. You can find help in surprising places! So check out when you notice symptoms surfacing, and when you notice that he seems OK. We would sometimes find symptoms suddenly turning up even while we were in school holiday time, but the more I observed the more I realised - there had been aconnection with school in some way. We might have been driving past the school, then five or ten minutes later, difficult child 3 suddenly went ghastly white and threw up. One day in the holidays he said to me out of the blue, "This year at school I won't let the bullies upset me, I'll just walk away and go tell a teacher." Ten minutes later he was throwing up again. Or he would be fine over the weekend, talking enthusiastically about seeing his friend at school next day, then he would get up, get dressed for school, be chattering excitedly about school - then half an hour before the bus was due, he was throwing up again. On days when I insisted he go, telling him he would be fine (or days when I dosed him with paracetamol to bring the fever down so he could pass as well enough for school) I would get phone calls asking me to come get him, he had already been vomiting several times. On days when I couldn't come get him he would spend the day in the sick bay, vomiting repeatedly. Or maybe not vomiting in sick bay, but any time he wassent to his class he was vomiting again. One teacher said, "I've watched him, he's actually trying to make himself sick," but I think it was her frustration with him, more than anything else. He simply hasn't got the guile to do this. Good luck with getting to the bottom of this. I hope, if there is a physical cause, you can find it out sooner rather than later. Marg [/QUOTE]
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Son is sick, missed school. Not sure what to make of it.
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