AmericanGirl
Member
Hi all,
difficult child was kicked out of the sober house on 1/12. Long story short - I went to get him on 1/13 and allowed him to move home - after he spoke to trusted friends who gave their blessings and difficult child agreed to many terms (changing his cell number, abandoning his old FB, staying away from old playmates, etc.)
He got his wisdom teeth out on 1/15. No problems with medications.
He got a full time job on 1/22 in a local manufacturing plant. Is working almost 50 hours a week. LOVES the job. Has turned over his entire paycheck towards his debt.
Judge closed his case about a week ago. He's still under unsupervised probation for two years.
Got him in to a local therapist where I go. He really likes her. She will refer him to a shrink for medication management. Downside is he can only see her monthly as it is a state run facility.
He has willingly gone to church with me every week. He interacts with pastors and other people there. Has had many friends to the house. With the exception of one, all have been great. Long story as to why but he has broken ties with that one now he realized who she truly is. He quit smoking a week ago. He's grouchy sometimes but, other than that, has been very kind and respectful towards me. Regularly tells me how happy he is.
We had a small bump last Thursday when an old friend asked him to go with them to an out of town nightclub. It was student night with special activities and no cover charge. difficult child and I talked about it. I told him how scary that was to me. However, I realize I have to remember that he is still a 19 year old kid. I liked what he said and how he approached the topic so I said okay. I guess I decided it was a great test of whether he was doing okay or not -- enough rope to hang himself kind of thing. He texted me when he got there and went he left. I saw FB pics where the large X on his hand (showing he was underaged) was visible. The guys he went with all had their shirts off and were covered in neon paint with huge grins on their faces. He got home at 4:30 am and then got himself up a few hours later and went to work on time. We talked about it later and he said the major difficulty was being around people smoking but that this place is really good about no underage drinking. My only complaint was he got orange paint on a towel....lol
Don't worry...my head isn't in the clouds. I often tell myself what a skilled liar difficult child can be.
I've been on a roller coaster of emotions this last month. Part of me is thrilled he is here. Part is scared things will go south again. Part is dealing with living with a teenager again after living alone for 15 months. I've neglected myself and my needs. I am working hard on getting back where I was.
I've also thought a lot about what happened and why things are where they are. I believe that the anti-depressants difficult child got on in the last rehab make a huge difference and then getting the dosage increased helped that along. difficult child says things like "I thought I was ready for the real world and I was wrong." Also, he grew up a lot during this time and had a lot of really wise people share their knowledge with him. Plus, he simply ran out of options and knew time (and life) was passing him by.
So...we shall see what tomorrow brings. It's a miracle he is where he is now. I pray he will continue to make good decisions.
difficult child was kicked out of the sober house on 1/12. Long story short - I went to get him on 1/13 and allowed him to move home - after he spoke to trusted friends who gave their blessings and difficult child agreed to many terms (changing his cell number, abandoning his old FB, staying away from old playmates, etc.)
He got his wisdom teeth out on 1/15. No problems with medications.
He got a full time job on 1/22 in a local manufacturing plant. Is working almost 50 hours a week. LOVES the job. Has turned over his entire paycheck towards his debt.
Judge closed his case about a week ago. He's still under unsupervised probation for two years.
Got him in to a local therapist where I go. He really likes her. She will refer him to a shrink for medication management. Downside is he can only see her monthly as it is a state run facility.
He has willingly gone to church with me every week. He interacts with pastors and other people there. Has had many friends to the house. With the exception of one, all have been great. Long story as to why but he has broken ties with that one now he realized who she truly is. He quit smoking a week ago. He's grouchy sometimes but, other than that, has been very kind and respectful towards me. Regularly tells me how happy he is.
We had a small bump last Thursday when an old friend asked him to go with them to an out of town nightclub. It was student night with special activities and no cover charge. difficult child and I talked about it. I told him how scary that was to me. However, I realize I have to remember that he is still a 19 year old kid. I liked what he said and how he approached the topic so I said okay. I guess I decided it was a great test of whether he was doing okay or not -- enough rope to hang himself kind of thing. He texted me when he got there and went he left. I saw FB pics where the large X on his hand (showing he was underaged) was visible. The guys he went with all had their shirts off and were covered in neon paint with huge grins on their faces. He got home at 4:30 am and then got himself up a few hours later and went to work on time. We talked about it later and he said the major difficulty was being around people smoking but that this place is really good about no underage drinking. My only complaint was he got orange paint on a towel....lol
Don't worry...my head isn't in the clouds. I often tell myself what a skilled liar difficult child can be.
I've been on a roller coaster of emotions this last month. Part of me is thrilled he is here. Part is scared things will go south again. Part is dealing with living with a teenager again after living alone for 15 months. I've neglected myself and my needs. I am working hard on getting back where I was.
I've also thought a lot about what happened and why things are where they are. I believe that the anti-depressants difficult child got on in the last rehab make a huge difference and then getting the dosage increased helped that along. difficult child says things like "I thought I was ready for the real world and I was wrong." Also, he grew up a lot during this time and had a lot of really wise people share their knowledge with him. Plus, he simply ran out of options and knew time (and life) was passing him by.
So...we shall see what tomorrow brings. It's a miracle he is where he is now. I pray he will continue to make good decisions.
