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Substance Abuse
Son self-sabotages every opportunity
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 764105" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Nandina, </p><p>Im so sorry for your troubles with your son. Prayers for you to continue on your path of self care with strength and Gods grace. When situations and consequences from our wayward adult kids choices pop up it’s hard to stay balanced and calm our aching hearts.</p><p></p><p>My eldest daughter Rain is the same. Without drugs, a very loving and kind soul. You are correct, there is no casual use with meth. Some folks I know were able to escape its grasp and build a life without it, but it takes a lot of willpower and complete change of lifestyle. I have spoken with people who have tried it and recognized how dangerous it is and never touched it again. </p><p></p><p>It is devastating. I’m sorry that your son has dabbled with it and seems caught up in it. My two daughters denied using it for quite some time years ago. “I only smoke pot, Mom”. But I knew it was more than “just pot” due to the changes in their looks and personality. </p><p></p><p>I’m sorry Nandina, it’s such a tough thing to witness. I’ve researched about meth a bit on the web. There is hope that one can gain back their potential and recover. It is not an easy drug to kick because of the effect it has, the extreme highs and crashes when sober. It has been a long, long road for my family and I. I definitely have my ups and downs with dealing with the sadness. The reality. There are times that I drive by the parks Rain frequents, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. My Tornado left court ordered rehab last month and after “hiatus” on the streets, is back in jail again. It has been her pattern to reach out and reconnect from rehab, or jail, then go completely off radar when she is out there somewhere. That hurts. Her being in jail has become a relief to me. At least I know where she is. Never thought I would be happy that my kid was in jail. Huh. Sigh.</p><p>I totally understand going no contact for your own sanity and protection. I have done that as well. It is hard to connect with our adult kids when they become untrustworthy and behave more like predators than family. </p><p>I pray that with the strength you have shown and help from your family and counselor, that you are able to rise above the choices your son makes. We certainly didn’t raise our children to lead this kind of life and it is painful to witness. Please take good care of yourself and do things that bring you light and joy. It is important to work at lifting ourselves up from the darkness that envelopes our wayward adult kids. I have to remind myself to keep back from the rabbit hole. Praying helps tremendously, and focusing on keeping solid relationships with my well children and grands. There is always a certain melancholy that exists in dealing with my two, processing their choices and appearances, then disappearances. How I know the work it takes to bring balance into our lives. Please take care and keep up the good fight to find peace in your life!</p><p>(Hugs)</p><p>New Leaf</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 764105, member: 19522"] Hi Nandina, Im so sorry for your troubles with your son. Prayers for you to continue on your path of self care with strength and Gods grace. When situations and consequences from our wayward adult kids choices pop up it’s hard to stay balanced and calm our aching hearts. My eldest daughter Rain is the same. Without drugs, a very loving and kind soul. You are correct, there is no casual use with meth. Some folks I know were able to escape its grasp and build a life without it, but it takes a lot of willpower and complete change of lifestyle. I have spoken with people who have tried it and recognized how dangerous it is and never touched it again. It is devastating. I’m sorry that your son has dabbled with it and seems caught up in it. My two daughters denied using it for quite some time years ago. “I only smoke pot, Mom”. But I knew it was more than “just pot” due to the changes in their looks and personality. I’m sorry Nandina, it’s such a tough thing to witness. I’ve researched about meth a bit on the web. There is hope that one can gain back their potential and recover. It is not an easy drug to kick because of the effect it has, the extreme highs and crashes when sober. It has been a long, long road for my family and I. I definitely have my ups and downs with dealing with the sadness. The reality. There are times that I drive by the parks Rain frequents, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. My Tornado left court ordered rehab last month and after “hiatus” on the streets, is back in jail again. It has been her pattern to reach out and reconnect from rehab, or jail, then go completely off radar when she is out there somewhere. That hurts. Her being in jail has become a relief to me. At least I know where she is. Never thought I would be happy that my kid was in jail. Huh. Sigh. I totally understand going no contact for your own sanity and protection. I have done that as well. It is hard to connect with our adult kids when they become untrustworthy and behave more like predators than family. I pray that with the strength you have shown and help from your family and counselor, that you are able to rise above the choices your son makes. We certainly didn’t raise our children to lead this kind of life and it is painful to witness. Please take good care of yourself and do things that bring you light and joy. It is important to work at lifting ourselves up from the darkness that envelopes our wayward adult kids. I have to remind myself to keep back from the rabbit hole. Praying helps tremendously, and focusing on keeping solid relationships with my well children and grands. There is always a certain melancholy that exists in dealing with my two, processing their choices and appearances, then disappearances. How I know the work it takes to bring balance into our lives. Please take care and keep up the good fight to find peace in your life! (Hugs) New Leaf [/QUOTE]
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