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General Parenting
Sons violence is getting out of hand
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 751177" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I forgot to mention expressive arts therapies, like art therapy, music and dance therapy, drama therapy. And he is not too young for martial arts. Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is a gentle martial art. If you have it near you. I have done a little of it and I am old. (I love it.) If your son has any interest, I would pay for private lessons, if I could. That is what I did. I loved it. But really, who I loved was the instructor.</p><p></p><p>It is hard to predict what could touch your son's interest and help him find the strong parts in him to begin to learn to self-soothe. He reminds me of myself in that sense. What you are describing suggests to me, that he bumps into something very painful, distressing, empty within himself that he does not know how to deal with, and just dissolves. I wonder if his anger is expressive and a call for help. Who else would he turn to with the expectation of help?</p><p></p><p>I have no experience with autism, but at one time a psychiatrist was considering a diagnosis of Aspergers for my son. I don't know if autism has these waves of functioning like you describe with your son. That he can be "normal" for weeks, and then this different functioning emerges. But I think you can try all kinds of things while you seek out a diagnosis, to see what could help him.</p><p></p><p>I am an independent, successful woman. But when I am in a space with these feelings, I feel hopeless and despondent and helpless, too. If there was somebody to hit, that might help me, I would do it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 751177, member: 18958"] I forgot to mention expressive arts therapies, like art therapy, music and dance therapy, drama therapy. And he is not too young for martial arts. Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is a gentle martial art. If you have it near you. I have done a little of it and I am old. (I love it.) If your son has any interest, I would pay for private lessons, if I could. That is what I did. I loved it. But really, who I loved was the instructor. It is hard to predict what could touch your son's interest and help him find the strong parts in him to begin to learn to self-soothe. He reminds me of myself in that sense. What you are describing suggests to me, that he bumps into something very painful, distressing, empty within himself that he does not know how to deal with, and just dissolves. I wonder if his anger is expressive and a call for help. Who else would he turn to with the expectation of help? I have no experience with autism, but at one time a psychiatrist was considering a diagnosis of Aspergers for my son. I don't know if autism has these waves of functioning like you describe with your son. That he can be "normal" for weeks, and then this different functioning emerges. But I think you can try all kinds of things while you seek out a diagnosis, to see what could help him. I am an independent, successful woman. But when I am in a space with these feelings, I feel hopeless and despondent and helpless, too. If there was somebody to hit, that might help me, I would do it. [/QUOTE]
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