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Spent the day with my mom and avoided in-law drama
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 375022" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>When I hear things like this, a saying comes to mind that you can't fix stupid <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p></p><p>I'm glad you took the time to dodge this get together and went instead to visit your mom. I'm sure it helped her immeasurably to have your company. I cannot imagine anyone thinking someone would be or should be okay only 2 weeks after losing their spouse. Grr! </p><p></p><p>My S/O's step father passed in July and I know my mother in law is struggling greatly to adjust to life without him. She comes across stoic in telephone calls, but we know she is not sleeping. She is a chatty chat and she is very quiet in conversations when we call her. She would call us a couple of times a week normally. We find ourselves calling her mostly now, although she's always relieved for a call when we make one, it is very "off" for her to not be calling. But very understandable. Its going to take a long time for her to adjust to simply missing him, not to mention new routines in her days, living alone, doing everything for herself that he used to take care of or contribute to, figuring out finances, wading through all the legal paperwork and government things that need to get done to finalize his affairs. Not to mention friends of his that aren't regular callers. She had a call last week on her answering machine, a friend of his saying to call him and inviting them both to visit. She realized she'd forgotten to contact him and now can't bring herself to call yet another person to say he's passed away. We offered but she says she wants to be the one to tell him, when she can bring herself to make the call. </p><p></p><p>In terms of your sister in law's comment, I wonder what that made her husband think! I mean, if my S/O said that, I'd be thinking he'll be throwing parties a few weeks later if I passed away. That has to hurt. Sounds like your husband really did you a good deed by helping "excuse you" from the gathering <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" />.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 375022, member: 4264"] When I hear things like this, a saying comes to mind that you can't fix stupid ;) I'm glad you took the time to dodge this get together and went instead to visit your mom. I'm sure it helped her immeasurably to have your company. I cannot imagine anyone thinking someone would be or should be okay only 2 weeks after losing their spouse. Grr! My S/O's step father passed in July and I know my mother in law is struggling greatly to adjust to life without him. She comes across stoic in telephone calls, but we know she is not sleeping. She is a chatty chat and she is very quiet in conversations when we call her. She would call us a couple of times a week normally. We find ourselves calling her mostly now, although she's always relieved for a call when we make one, it is very "off" for her to not be calling. But very understandable. Its going to take a long time for her to adjust to simply missing him, not to mention new routines in her days, living alone, doing everything for herself that he used to take care of or contribute to, figuring out finances, wading through all the legal paperwork and government things that need to get done to finalize his affairs. Not to mention friends of his that aren't regular callers. She had a call last week on her answering machine, a friend of his saying to call him and inviting them both to visit. She realized she'd forgotten to contact him and now can't bring herself to call yet another person to say he's passed away. We offered but she says she wants to be the one to tell him, when she can bring herself to make the call. In terms of your sister in law's comment, I wonder what that made her husband think! I mean, if my S/O said that, I'd be thinking he'll be throwing parties a few weeks later if I passed away. That has to hurt. Sounds like your husband really did you a good deed by helping "excuse you" from the gathering ;). [/QUOTE]
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Spent the day with my mom and avoided in-law drama
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