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General Parenting
Spitting, hating, hitting . . . what do you DO?!
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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 174414" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>Don't beat yourself up! You are human and you wouldn't be here if your were not looking for and trying to help your family.</p><p>All of us feel frustrated. Until you figure out what is going on with difficult child you have to go easy on yourself and him a bit. </p><p>I would be firm with the most important things, the things that can slide... let them.</p><p>if he is having a meltdown, spitting or hitting. Let him know it is not OK. I would remove him automatically from any situation. I remove K from the room if she touches her sister. N has a safe place that she goes to. </p><p>For you it would be harder with the baby, but I get everyone in a "safe place" and then take K to another room until she can calm down. (We have to use some alternative techniques that our psychiatrist has taught us, but it is because of her diagnosis)</p><p>If we are out, we leave the place the if she starts getting violent or oppositional. It is very hard when you don't know what you are dealing with. </p><p>I try to distract her, we also do role playing. Re-enacting how she treated others. (not actually hurting each other) </p><p>A lot of it depends on how unstable your child is. Does he like rewards? Use rewards for an hour of good behavior in the beginning, move it to a longer period if he responds. </p><p>No spitting for half a day, he gets something he loves... things like that. It is OK to teach some of our kids cause and effect. Bribary is good at times!!!</p><p></p><p>I wish you luck. You are doing a good job...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 174414, member: 3155"] Don't beat yourself up! You are human and you wouldn't be here if your were not looking for and trying to help your family. All of us feel frustrated. Until you figure out what is going on with difficult child you have to go easy on yourself and him a bit. I would be firm with the most important things, the things that can slide... let them. if he is having a meltdown, spitting or hitting. Let him know it is not OK. I would remove him automatically from any situation. I remove K from the room if she touches her sister. N has a safe place that she goes to. For you it would be harder with the baby, but I get everyone in a "safe place" and then take K to another room until she can calm down. (We have to use some alternative techniques that our psychiatrist has taught us, but it is because of her diagnosis) If we are out, we leave the place the if she starts getting violent or oppositional. It is very hard when you don't know what you are dealing with. I try to distract her, we also do role playing. Re-enacting how she treated others. (not actually hurting each other) A lot of it depends on how unstable your child is. Does he like rewards? Use rewards for an hour of good behavior in the beginning, move it to a longer period if he responds. No spitting for half a day, he gets something he loves... things like that. It is OK to teach some of our kids cause and effect. Bribary is good at times!!! I wish you luck. You are doing a good job... [/QUOTE]
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Spitting, hating, hitting . . . what do you DO?!
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