Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Squatters
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 761259" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Nomad. You and your husband have gone above and beyond for your daughter. No matter how impossibly she behaved, you worked with her. She did get better in some ways, over time. (I am thinking back years ago to that horrible Christmas trip involving the train, to visit relatives. OMG. That is engraved in my head. I am somehow remembering some highly irregular article of clothing. </p><p></p><p>But you always stayed in the game with her. You and your husband have been so loving and so caring.</p><p></p><p>She qualifies for Section 8 housing. She could work with the SSI case manager to set up a caretaking plan, and she could get a low rent subsidized apartment. I don't even think it's the best idea for your husband to remain her payee. That in itself is stressful. You used the word entitlement in one of your posts. I think she takes all of this help as her due and is not grateful. Why keep the ties with the payee-relationship? There are volunteer payees that are trained and supervised by Social Security. There is no cost to have one. What is in it for anybody for your husband to have a role where she can direct abuse and conflict his way? *And your way?</p><p></p><p>There are only two possible outcomes I see. One, she stays the same, and you've got to cut your losses. Two, she learns that there is reciprocity in life and if over and over again you mistreat people who help you and love you and feel responsible to help you--eventually they will move out of your life, to protect themselves. This is a lesson she needs to learn.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, she seems like she is acting loony with comments like she made to your son. But I think in her way she's a survivor.</p><p>Nomad. We are obligated to protect ourselves. I think that might even be in the bible! Our children have to learn to treat us better!</p><p></p><p>You can't live with this kind of stress! You know that. None of us can!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 761259, member: 18958"] Nomad. You and your husband have gone above and beyond for your daughter. No matter how impossibly she behaved, you worked with her. She did get better in some ways, over time. (I am thinking back years ago to that horrible Christmas trip involving the train, to visit relatives. OMG. That is engraved in my head. I am somehow remembering some highly irregular article of clothing. But you always stayed in the game with her. You and your husband have been so loving and so caring. She qualifies for Section 8 housing. She could work with the SSI case manager to set up a caretaking plan, and she could get a low rent subsidized apartment. I don't even think it's the best idea for your husband to remain her payee. That in itself is stressful. You used the word entitlement in one of your posts. I think she takes all of this help as her due and is not grateful. Why keep the ties with the payee-relationship? There are volunteer payees that are trained and supervised by Social Security. There is no cost to have one. What is in it for anybody for your husband to have a role where she can direct abuse and conflict his way? *And your way? There are only two possible outcomes I see. One, she stays the same, and you've got to cut your losses. Two, she learns that there is reciprocity in life and if over and over again you mistreat people who help you and love you and feel responsible to help you--eventually they will move out of your life, to protect themselves. This is a lesson she needs to learn. Unfortunately, she seems like she is acting loony with comments like she made to your son. But I think in her way she's a survivor. Nomad. We are obligated to protect ourselves. I think that might even be in the bible! Our children have to learn to treat us better! You can't live with this kind of stress! You know that. None of us can! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Squatters
Top