Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
***Standswithcourage***
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 129401" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I dont know many people who wouldnt wish we could have a magic wand that would make things better. If all the time, effort and love us parents have poured into these kids by the time they are 18 hasnt had the effect we hoped it would have, driving ourselves insane now isnt going to help. </p><p></p><p>Let me tell you a little story. I was a huge difficult child as a teen/young adult. I did many a thing that I shouldnt have done. My parents divorced when I was 18 or 19. 19 I think. When that happened my mom did everything in her power to enable my bad behavior because it kept me dependent on her. My father on the other hand basically told me to get over myself. I was not allowed to live with him, not allowed to drag him into my messes. He really didnt want to deal with me if I was being stupid. He told me he loved me, he always would, but that I had made my bed. Call him if/when I got my life together. </p><p></p><p>He always cared about my kids but he refused to enable me. It took him quite awhile to see that I had changed before he would do more than send my kids presents or an outfit or two.</p><p></p><p>Now? He is my strongest supporter. He was so proud of me when I graduated college and it meant more to me to have him proud of me than anything. I have talked to him in the last few years about what he did for me. I think he gave me the kick in the pants to turn my life around. I adore the man. Im thankful he stood his ground when it couldnt have been easy. Im sure he worried horribly about me. Im his only child. Now he worries about me but in the normal parental way. He isnt worried Im out drugging or doing illegal things. He knows if he sends me money Im not going to spend it on drugs or partying. Now he just worries if Im healthy, how I am feeling, yada yada. </p><p></p><p>But I still couldnt go home again.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 129401, member: 1514"] I dont know many people who wouldnt wish we could have a magic wand that would make things better. If all the time, effort and love us parents have poured into these kids by the time they are 18 hasnt had the effect we hoped it would have, driving ourselves insane now isnt going to help. Let me tell you a little story. I was a huge difficult child as a teen/young adult. I did many a thing that I shouldnt have done. My parents divorced when I was 18 or 19. 19 I think. When that happened my mom did everything in her power to enable my bad behavior because it kept me dependent on her. My father on the other hand basically told me to get over myself. I was not allowed to live with him, not allowed to drag him into my messes. He really didnt want to deal with me if I was being stupid. He told me he loved me, he always would, but that I had made my bed. Call him if/when I got my life together. He always cared about my kids but he refused to enable me. It took him quite awhile to see that I had changed before he would do more than send my kids presents or an outfit or two. Now? He is my strongest supporter. He was so proud of me when I graduated college and it meant more to me to have him proud of me than anything. I have talked to him in the last few years about what he did for me. I think he gave me the kick in the pants to turn my life around. I adore the man. Im thankful he stood his ground when it couldnt have been easy. Im sure he worried horribly about me. Im his only child. Now he worries about me but in the normal parental way. He isnt worried Im out drugging or doing illegal things. He knows if he sends me money Im not going to spend it on drugs or partying. Now he just worries if Im healthy, how I am feeling, yada yada. But I still couldnt go home again. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
***Standswithcourage***
Top