buddy
New Member
Q often takes things, not from stores or big things but like Qtips from my sister's bathroom or if there are pencils in the hall at school etc. He has taken things they let him use and kept them too. He usually tells on himself and says, I better bring these back because I borrowed them and then brings them back. But he really does like to take things and I dont want him to develop a stealing problem. today we came close, but it was even sneakier because he asked one person for one thing then another didn't know and he conveniently didn't tell her that the first prize was not his that he came in with. Good thing he is not subtle about these things. Easy to catch him in the story....
gosh, so here is what happened... after the Occupational Therapist (OT) evaluation (which I will post about, seemed really really good) they had a bunch of gifts for the kids for rewards. He had earlier, when the therapist was only with me, asked another lady if he could have this beanie bear and she said that could be the prize he chooses. Well later when he was done, he was told by his therapist that he could pick a prize and he still had the bear and chose a fishing rod. I asked where the bear came from and he said I came here with it. I said, no you did not so where is it from (thinking another child left it and he picked it up...he often does that and we go over the rules over and over...he always puts things back ...if that is the case.....) So, a little bit later the therapist tells me she found out where it came from and knows he lied about it. So I told him that we knew that the other lady told him it was a choice he could make. But he can't have two gifts. He was really locked in at that point and under his breath he starts the swearing chain... I just said, well you decide, we have plenty of time. He stayed in his chair and I sat on the other side of the room playing with my phone. Eventually he got up and said, come on mom... and walked out the door, I went to look on his chair and the bear was there. I gave it back. When we were outside, he said, mom that was just too hard of a choice. I said I know but it is how things work, we can't just steal things.
Later I asked, why can't we steal things Q... because the police will get us.
So again we talk about how it hurts people's feelings and is just not a nice thing to do. After being home, he calls up to me when I was upstairs, mom, can I have this 26 cents that is in your green coat pocket? Um, Q, that is stealing from my pocket.... NO mom, I am asking.... But you have to ask first if you can check for money. Once it is in your hand, it is too late.
SO, you can pick to keep that money or take the 4 dollars I was going to give you for supper with Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) tonight.
"I Want the .26" OK, that 's fine.
about 10 minutes later.... he says here mom, and gave me the money. OK.... all is good but ..............about 15 minutes later... "mom, do you think God knows that you said it was OK and so it is not stealing anymore, I didn't want to hurt you"
... hmmmm, maybe developing some internal code??? Still the God thing, he is probably worried about punishment like with the police but he also knows that we focus on God wanting us to be nice to others etc.... well, I can hope it is half a baby step. (not delusional at all, I know we will be going through this probably for years, but still????)
gosh, so here is what happened... after the Occupational Therapist (OT) evaluation (which I will post about, seemed really really good) they had a bunch of gifts for the kids for rewards. He had earlier, when the therapist was only with me, asked another lady if he could have this beanie bear and she said that could be the prize he chooses. Well later when he was done, he was told by his therapist that he could pick a prize and he still had the bear and chose a fishing rod. I asked where the bear came from and he said I came here with it. I said, no you did not so where is it from (thinking another child left it and he picked it up...he often does that and we go over the rules over and over...he always puts things back ...if that is the case.....) So, a little bit later the therapist tells me she found out where it came from and knows he lied about it. So I told him that we knew that the other lady told him it was a choice he could make. But he can't have two gifts. He was really locked in at that point and under his breath he starts the swearing chain... I just said, well you decide, we have plenty of time. He stayed in his chair and I sat on the other side of the room playing with my phone. Eventually he got up and said, come on mom... and walked out the door, I went to look on his chair and the bear was there. I gave it back. When we were outside, he said, mom that was just too hard of a choice. I said I know but it is how things work, we can't just steal things.
Later I asked, why can't we steal things Q... because the police will get us.
So again we talk about how it hurts people's feelings and is just not a nice thing to do. After being home, he calls up to me when I was upstairs, mom, can I have this 26 cents that is in your green coat pocket? Um, Q, that is stealing from my pocket.... NO mom, I am asking.... But you have to ask first if you can check for money. Once it is in your hand, it is too late.
SO, you can pick to keep that money or take the 4 dollars I was going to give you for supper with Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) tonight.
"I Want the .26" OK, that 's fine.
about 10 minutes later.... he says here mom, and gave me the money. OK.... all is good but ..............about 15 minutes later... "mom, do you think God knows that you said it was OK and so it is not stealing anymore, I didn't want to hurt you"
... hmmmm, maybe developing some internal code??? Still the God thing, he is probably worried about punishment like with the police but he also knows that we focus on God wanting us to be nice to others etc.... well, I can hope it is half a baby step. (not delusional at all, I know we will be going through this probably for years, but still????)