My difficult child has taken another step forward, one that is huge for him. He told no to a 'friend' who was trying to take an advantage of him. And when he got that going, he did the same again only two days later to other friends. I honestly think these were the first time ever he has been able to draw a healthy boundary in appropriate manner with friends. I did notice something about the first instance in his Fb last week but didn't dare to ask in fear of only slowing down the progress of getting there. But he had indeed denied something from the old 'friend' and really told him no and not just tried to get away from it by lying, promising and 'forgetting', pretending not to hear/understand what was asked or any other of his normal methods. And it wasn't about him getting enough and finally lashing out and telling no then. He simply told that he couldn't help the 'friend' this time. ('Friend' here meaning a local boy difficult child has known his all life, who has always either bullied difficult child or pretended to be friendly when wanting something from him and whose friend difficult child has always wanted to be and to whom he has always done any and every possible favour to make him even talk to him.) And when he got started, he had yesterday also told no to his friends in his current town, when they wanted difficult child to come with them to a night club for an hour so they could get in (age limit is 21 or 23, I think, but because difficult child plays for the town's favourite team, he can get himself and few friends with him who are over the legal limit (18) but under the club's own limit in.) difficult child couldn't go partying himself this time. But they asked him to come with them for a short while to get them in and even asked him to come and pick them up and drive them home at the closing time (around 4 a.m.) because it was cold and they would likely have to wait a long time to get a taxi. And like an actual sane person difficult child told them that he wouldn't, they could go to the night club with lower age limit and either wait for taxi or walk that mile or two they need to get to their homes. Yeah, I know it is a no-brainer, but this actually was the first time difficult child actually told no. When I called him today, he was eager to tell me both of this, even if he tried to go roundabout way about it. But it was very much 'Mommy, mommy, look what I did.' (Yeah, he is immature to his age.) It seems he was quite coached to do it, but it is still huge for him. I had an idea this was one of the things in his mental coach's social skills to work with-list and when difficult child talked about this, he several times told what the mental coach says, what two of his older team mates have said and even what a wife of his former coach (they live in the same town and difficult child still has dinner at their house time to time and talks with his former coach regularly) have said. So I guess this has been under work for some time now and has been difficult thing to difficult child to do and he has looked several 'second opinions'/support. But he did it; draw a real, healthy boundary with the people he wants to please. It is kind of odd that it is an issue to someone so obnoxious and arrogantly behaving than difficult child, but it certainly is. He has always wanted to be friends with these type of people so much that he has been ready to do almost anything. It has never really worked out for him, but he hasn't stopped trying. And while he hasn't always done what they have wanted him to do, he has always tried very passive-aggressive, sneaky methods for getting away from it. But actually simply telling them: "Sorry, no. Can't do that for you this time." That is something totally new and huge for him.