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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 539620" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi. in my opinion you are dealing with a hello lot more than ADHD and "behavior problems." We adopted a very disturbed and frightening 11 year old child once and he had three symptoms that we soon learned were called The McDonald Triad for children who can turn into psychopaths as adults: 1/peeing and pooping inappropriately 2/cruelty to animals and 3/fascination with fire. </p><p></p><p>McDonald Triad link: <a href="http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad" target="_blank">http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad</a></p><p></p><p>You have a dangerous child on your hands. It is not a parenting issue anymore...he probably had a very chaotic early upbringing and it caused him to be this way, but that sad fact in no way makes him safe to be around your baby or your pets. This is a child in my opinion and experience who needs an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) to get 24/7 treatment. He also needs to be watched all the time and you can't do that. If you go to the bathroom, he could burn down your house. I am taking a wild guess that he has some attachment disorder issues. Did he have many caregivers or bounce back and forth from mom/dad/grandma or spend time in a hospital or foster care as a baby and toddler? </p><p></p><p>When I hear about children like this, I am very sorry for them, but since I also lived with one, I also try to warn the parent that this is not going to get better quick and that counseling is not enough and that you can not guess what this child will do the minute he is out of your sight for a minute. You are lucky he didn't choke your dog to death. Our child choked two dogs to death. The first time we didn't know it was him (he was clever). The second time, he was the only one home, except for me and I didn't do it. He also sexually abused my younger kids (another reason to be careful of your baby). </p><p></p><p>I don't have any answers because you are not the custodial parent, but I'd make darn sure this child was NEVER alone with either the baby or the little dogs. If you have cats, them either. Of course, like our kid, he could go around trying to kill dogs of neighbors, but I don't know if he is doing that yet. We didn't know how bad things were until this child was out of our house for good. We called CPS and told them to take him. Then it all came out. The other kids had been terrified of him so we hadn't realized the extreme things he had done besides killing the dogs.</p><p></p><p>My advice, from one who has been there, is that if hub insists on bringing this child to your house for the summer, find somewhere else to stay for the summer and let him deal with it. Your baby and your pets do not need this and you can't save him. His behaviors are too severe for any one person to save him at this time. Talk to hub about residential treatment for him. in my opinion that will keep the boy safe, get him the level of treatment he needs, and keep the people who care about him (and who have to be around him) safe too.</p><p></p><p>Huggs!!! Keep us posted!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 539620, member: 1550"] Hi. in my opinion you are dealing with a hello lot more than ADHD and "behavior problems." We adopted a very disturbed and frightening 11 year old child once and he had three symptoms that we soon learned were called The McDonald Triad for children who can turn into psychopaths as adults: 1/peeing and pooping inappropriately 2/cruelty to animals and 3/fascination with fire. McDonald Triad link: [url]http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad[/url] You have a dangerous child on your hands. It is not a parenting issue anymore...he probably had a very chaotic early upbringing and it caused him to be this way, but that sad fact in no way makes him safe to be around your baby or your pets. This is a child in my opinion and experience who needs an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) to get 24/7 treatment. He also needs to be watched all the time and you can't do that. If you go to the bathroom, he could burn down your house. I am taking a wild guess that he has some attachment disorder issues. Did he have many caregivers or bounce back and forth from mom/dad/grandma or spend time in a hospital or foster care as a baby and toddler? When I hear about children like this, I am very sorry for them, but since I also lived with one, I also try to warn the parent that this is not going to get better quick and that counseling is not enough and that you can not guess what this child will do the minute he is out of your sight for a minute. You are lucky he didn't choke your dog to death. Our child choked two dogs to death. The first time we didn't know it was him (he was clever). The second time, he was the only one home, except for me and I didn't do it. He also sexually abused my younger kids (another reason to be careful of your baby). I don't have any answers because you are not the custodial parent, but I'd make darn sure this child was NEVER alone with either the baby or the little dogs. If you have cats, them either. Of course, like our kid, he could go around trying to kill dogs of neighbors, but I don't know if he is doing that yet. We didn't know how bad things were until this child was out of our house for good. We called CPS and told them to take him. Then it all came out. The other kids had been terrified of him so we hadn't realized the extreme things he had done besides killing the dogs. My advice, from one who has been there, is that if hub insists on bringing this child to your house for the summer, find somewhere else to stay for the summer and let him deal with it. Your baby and your pets do not need this and you can't save him. His behaviors are too severe for any one person to save him at this time. Talk to hub about residential treatment for him. in my opinion that will keep the boy safe, get him the level of treatment he needs, and keep the people who care about him (and who have to be around him) safe too. Huggs!!! Keep us posted! [/QUOTE]
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