Sticky fingers ~ chapter 3

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by timer lady, Oct 7, 2010.

  1. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    So, onto chapter 3 of sticky fingers aka wm.

    Chapter 1: Christmas last year wm walked into foster mum & dad's bedroom with-o permission & broke into their lockbox containing their holiday spending cash. He promptly stole $500.00.

    Chapter 2: About 5 months ago, wm picked the lock to foster parents bedroom & smashed the new lockbox & stole another $500.00.

    Chapter 3: I rec'd a call from foster mum who informed me wm is on "lockdown" because there is $1000.00 missing.

    Okay, my son (wiping tears of maternal pride from my eyes) has sticky fingers; heck his is a burglar in training. The first $500 was found before wm could spend any of it. The second stash of money was found but wm had spent $150 of it claiming it was a gift from his grandpa. wm had to work off the money spent. I sat with him as he wrote a letter of apology with promises it wouldn't happen ever again.

    At that point I told wm that foster mum & dad (who are like family in this household) don't deserve this, period. If wm needs money he only has to ask & explain what he needs. Of course, wm argued the point.

    As to the currently missing $1000 - foster dad left his bedroom door unlocked when he went to shower. wm is denying & blaming everyone else. Is still on lockdown AND is itching to go out to buy the latest play station claiming he got birthday money from his paternal grandparents (not).

    For foster mum & dad's sake (I know their need to have cash on hand) I asked if I could buy them a safe. If wm chooses to break the law that is his business but I don't want foster parents to suffer. I offered to replace the $$$.

    So far they have refused ~ they know wm, they know the $$ will show up because wm will not be able to sit on it much longer.

    I love my children - I really really do. :tongue:
  2. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    I think a safe would make a lovely Christmas gift.

    You are blessed to have such great co-parents with you for wm.
  3. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    What happens when they get paternal grandparents on the phone and ask them, "Did you give wm money for his birthday? Was it $1000?"

    Birthday money sufficient to buy a Playstation, is far too much birthday money anyway. He's not really inventive with his lies, is he?

    I agree about the safe, as a good Christmas present. As long as they don't write the code down where wm can find it.

  4. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    Yes, I agree about the safe...they've given wm too many chances at this point and he clearly cannot be trusted with cash in the house.

    Hope he "coughs it up" soon!
  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Since this is the third time he has done it, and the amounts are NOT small, are they planning to contact the police? Esp if it does not show up ASAP?? I am not sure that legal involvement will help wm, but whatever is happening now is not helping him to learn that he cannot steal with-o having real consequences. If he is willing to do this to his other family, what is to stop him from stealing from others?

    I hope that there is a very strong consequence (possibly arrest for theft??)and he needs to return the $$ AND work it off in hard labor. Maybe someday he will stop this, but it sure doesn't seem likely.

    I amm so sorry that he has this lesson to learn the hard way.
  6. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    So sorry, Linda.

    And I agree, a safe (or maybe a pair of them - one that fits inside the other) would be very appropriate.
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I do agree that a safe would be a very nice gift. Maybe for Halloween?? Can you take part of the cost out of wm's allowance or whatever?? Or have them do it or make him work off the $?
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    The Honeywell safe I have that bolts to a shelf or floor would be ideal for the fosters. It isnt really that much money (under a $100) and he couldnt carry it anywhere. Its also combo and a keyed lock. Keyhole is hidden but you can access it if needed.
  9. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Really surprised that they keep that much cash around...
  10. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Awww Linda.....our boys do make us proud, don't they? Two grand from foster parents....musical instruments and electronics from the Salvation Army and churches. Sigh. Such talents.

  11. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Linda, you know, I kinda hate to bring this up, but at 16 wm is getting too old for this mess to be anything more than consciously making the choice to steal. I'm wondering why fosters didn't call the cops. Not one to suggest drastic measures lightly, but we are up to 2k in theft here - this is not two dollars out of the wallet for a bunch of quarters out of a jar. At some point he is going to have to pay some serious societal consequences - his reaction to those consequences might very well show how he will move forward (or not).