Stressed and Depressing Life

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by ME & THE BOYS, Jun 25, 2007.

  1. ME & THE BOYS

    ME & THE BOYS New Member

    This is going to sound awful to some I suppose, but do any of you ever feel your life is so stressful and depressing because of your child (BUT YET, OF NO FAULT TO YOUR CHILD)?

    Has this wording come out right?

    I love my child, but dislike so much about him. My life is so stressful with him. So draining. Not much fun at all.

    Please don't tell me I am horrible for feeling this way. I'll have you no, I DO EVERYTHNG FOR HIM.

    Thank you.
  2. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    That's not horrible at all. Right now I'm in a place where I don't spend anymore time with my difficult child than I absolutely have to. He is mouthy and disrespectful to me so much that I've had it. If that's how he's going to act towards me then fine. Stay out of my face. Just don't sit there and whine and complain because you and I don't do anything together anymore.

    So yeah, before I go off on a little tangent, been there done that. Nothing anyone can do to make it go away but sending hugs anyway.
  3. CCRidr2

    CCRidr2 Sheena-Warrior Momma

    Our difficult child and I used to play a game when he said "I love you" and I would say "I love you more" and on like that.

    Now, most times I don't want to play! I will say it once and all the while I am thinking "You're probably right, right now" :thumbsdown:

    We've all been there done that, I think! It does feel horrible though, thinking like that! Hang in there!
  4. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Wow! Mine has pretty much the same diagnosis except for the intellectual difficulties and I sooooo know where you are. I love him, but he's blowing my mind with the animosity that's being shot my way over the last 3 weeks or so.

    Don't worry, you're not horrible OR're human. Remember when you loved your parents when you were a teenager, but didn't want to be within miles of them? Same here, it's just society saying that your heart is supposed to leap with joy at the mere mention of your offspring. Society is 1/2 right: my heart leaps, just with dread rather than "joy" some of the time!

    Don't worry, there's nothing wrong with being's a condition all of us suffer from!!!
  5. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    someone says this topic about once a week. so it is common to us parents of difficult children.

    we are only human. it takes superhuman love and strength to face their challenges. for me, that means a healthy dose of faith to get by.
  6. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    You are certainly NOT horrible! We ALL feel this way on this board from time to time. It is harder than almost anything I can think of to raise these kids!

    About 6 years ago I had to quit my full time, successful career and get a loan from my parents in order to adequately deal with the challenges my difficult child was presenting me. I miss my career every single day - and on my really bad days I feel like my difficult child has stolen every good thing in my life.

    Therapy, however, has saved my mind - if you don't have it for yourself I would recommend that more highly than getting your son some. I also take an anti-depressant that helps tremendously.

    I just saw an't mom's quote in her profile - how perfect for this thread!

    "We have to give up the life we planned to have the life that is waiting for us"------Joseph Campbell
  7. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh yes, we all understand that feeling. No reason to feel guilty. Parenting a difficult child is HARD!!!
  8. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    <span style='font-family: Comic Sans MS'><span style="color: #FF6666"><span style='font-size: 20pt'>Absolutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</span>!!</span></span> <span style='font-size: 14pt'> </span> <span style='font-size: 20pt'> </span>
  9. guest3

    guest3 Guest

    when a child sucks you dry of every ounce of emotional and physical energy that you have, those feelings are oh so natural, it's even more fun when you have more then one kid doing it! Take a "me" moment, wether it's a weekend away or a hot shower/bath :bath: and a pint of Ben & Jerry's that no one esle is allowed to touch but you LOL &lt;HUGS&gt;
  10. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    As the others have said, your feelings are totally normal! There are parts of most days when I don't like my difficult child. They wear us out and they wear us down. Finding that "me" time really is important. Without my workouts I would probably be absolutely, certifiably insane! Hugs.
  11. AllStressedOut

    AllStressedOut New Member

    You are COMPLETELY normal normal normal. Don't beat yourself up about it, life with difficult children is much more draining than with PCs. Take some "me" time even if its only staying up later or getting up early to be by yourself.
  12. ME & THE BOYS

    ME & THE BOYS New Member

    What is difficult child? husband? easy child?

    I see these abbreviatons, but don't knwo what they stand for?
  13. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

  14. IMSnoopee

    IMSnoopee New Member

    I'm so glad I found this site. I have been at my wits end with my son lately. He's a huge momma's boy -- sucking so much out of me! And sometimes I feel anger for him as much as I love him.

    But the other day I was telling his case manager at school about him sucking me dry and being such a momma's boy... she said that kids like mine (ODD, ADHD, etc) tend to be clingy to their parents because they get so much negativity from others. That made me pause.

    Anyway, I just wanted to say you're not alone. Getting some personal counseling with-someone experienced in children's mental health issues is good.