Stupid, childish, dumb, wrong...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Shari, Jan 25, 2010.

  1. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Yup, that about sums it up.
    ***
    When we went to Christmas with the ex-in-law's, DEX's whacky girlfriend was there. Very shortly after arriving, I thought it appeared that she was attempting to flaunt her engagement ring at me. And I thought to myself "self? Seriously? No way." so I discounted it. Never said anything to anyone, and never said anything more about it.
    ***
    Several days later, I'm sitting at work and easy child 1's girlfriend, who was at Christmas at the ex'es, also, emails me. "Was whacky girlfriend totally flaunting her ring at you on Sunday, or what????" So I asked her what she was talking about, and she saw the same awkward motions and sitting positions that kept this otherwise right-handed woman with her left hand, palm down, towards me at all times. Heck, even easy child 1 noticed. We had a good laugh at the absurdity of that.
    ***
    Enter my good friend, the restaraunt owner. She goes to a New Year's party with us, which happens to be across the street from the bar where DEX and whacky girlfriend are. Also where easy child 1 and his friends have gone. easy child 1 and company said the bar party was lame, so they joined us at the family friendly, BYOB, karaoke party. We had a great time. easy child 1's girlfriend brings up whacky girlfriend and says its too bad we don't have a giant bling bling ring...she'd love to take me across the street with some giant bling for me to flaunt, so, of course, the story has to be explained, and my friend the restaraunt owner is ON IT.
    ***
    I now have a very real looking ring with 5 stones in a high setting. The largest is slightly smaller than a carat, the other 4 are about 1/2 carat size. I knocked the diamond out of my engagement ring (for real) some time back and have not had it fixed yet, just been wearing my band. easy child 1's girlfriend and restaraunt owner want me to "be caught" with this new "replacement" ring by whacky girlfriend. They want to post a picture of it on facebook.
    ***
    So... childish, stupid, dumb, wrong - pretty much describes it, but sheesh does it ever make me laugh. I must be just an awful human being.
     
  2. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    It's the little things, ya know?
     
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    ... that make life so dang entertaining and worthwhile! :tongue: Sometimes it's so very therapeutic to tap into our inner child for the benefit of someone else's chain that desperately needs yanking, Know what I mean??
     
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Yanking someone's chain is one of my favorite activities...let us know how it goes!
     
  5. bby31288

    bby31288 Active Member

    If its any consolation, I have a really jerk for a new neighbor. I mean total, leaves notes because our car is parked in the street by his house and he doesn't want to look at it jerk. Also, that our recycling can, that is in our back yard, behind a privacy fence doesn't have a cover and he can see it from his bathroom.....that kind of a jerk.

    Well I was really childish and requested some sample of depends for him. LOL. Also, some rogaine coupons, and some impotenance herb samples. Yup, mailed to his house....Ha....

    Thanks whoever posted the free sample websites!!!

    Geeze, I think we are all a little difficult child ;)
     
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2010
  6. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    I'm not EVEN going to go there on the subject of
    perhaps WE (include self) are all a little (laughing) difficult child.

    But I like bby's style......ROFLMAO
     
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I love it. Be SURE to let us know how it goes. This is TOO AWESOME!
     
  8. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    "Stupid, childish, dumb, wrong... "

    Yep! It's all those things! And I say ... GO FOR IT!!! And let us know how it comes out!
     
  9. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Wow! And I feel bad for thinking this is funny! At least I have good company in my "bad" corner...
     
  10. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I have a better suggestion. Don't flaunt your ring, it only follows the trend she has set. Instead, go looking for those little spring-loaded rings you can get. Not for the finger, but for other parts of the body. You can use these as fake belly rings, for example. I bought a couple of these at a local ethnic shop, the sort that smells of sandalwood and rose oil, loaded with incense, belly dance belts, camel bells and cheesecloth in bright colours. I got one which in the palm of the hand looks like an upper case letter G. Another looking like a miniature hair pin with a dolphin on one side, and a chain running from the dolphin's ear to an earring stud.

    Now I'm not suggesting you wear it in the belly. Nope. You wear it IN YOUR NOSE. Or on your lip. The little G-shaped one, slides into your nose and looks for all the world like you have had a ring put in one nostril. It looks really authentic.
    The dolphin-shaped one slides into your nose on one side and looks like a nose stud (except that the little bar the dolphin is on can be a bit long and you don't want the bar visible) and you then string the chain up to the stud you put in your ear.

    So you have a choice - wear some nice make-up, make an effort to look really good - then insert the 'stud'.

    Or go for the full Goth/punk look, again do a really good job and not sloppy, then take photos and post them on Facebook. Talk about the new man in your life and the wonderful new vistas opening up.

    But go easy with Facebook or anything else too public if there is a chance a future employer could find it a bit too confronting.

    Actually, what will work the best is wearing this get-up where ONY the girlfriend can see it. Then vanish it. She won't be able to tell anyone who will believe her!

    She's playing very public games, and nobody is fooled. You really don't need to do anything. But whatever you do - don't be public.

    The best revenge is success. Her flaunting the ring is only going to work, if you are still obviously pining for exH. If you clearly are not in need of him, then she just looks like a really sad case.

    Marg
     
  11. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Oh, beleive me, Marg....I pine for a lot of things...exH is NOT one of them.

    Which is why we all thought it was so ridiculous. ExH left voluntarily 7 years ago, but at my command. He tried to come back several times and the answer wasn't only no, it was "he!! no!" And beyond that, I maintained a friendly relationship with him, to boot, but any sort of "us" was OVER.

    Why in the world his "new woman" would feel the need to rub my nose in the success of her "hunt" is absolutely beyond me. Its not like she "won" him and I "lost" him or anything. She can have him. I am thinking she's not the brightest crayon in the box.

    Its stupid and childish and dumb and everything else I said, but I don't see any harm in it. It won't be aimed at anyone, it will simply be a picture on facebook. I just happen to know she'll see it, 'cause she watches. ExSIL says she puts on quite the show in my presence, for some reason. (maybe feels the need to "protect" her man from the man stealer I am? I dunno.) I'll probably never even hear a word about it, and that's quite ok, too.

    Besides, the fake bling is kinda pretty. It might be fun to be girly for a few days!
     
  12. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Being girly is good. having fun is good. I agree, she's not the sharpest tool in the shed. And yes, I did 'get' that this bloke is no prize as far as you're concerned.

    I think what annoys you, is she thinks you think that way. That would sure annoy me. I've actually had a similar experience (years ago in my teens) when a bloke I barely knew asked me to marry him. No flamin' way! I was only 17 anyway and I couldn't stand the guy. But there was something a bit - well, about the way this guy kept chasing after me. I really wasn't interested, there were so many reasons why I wasn't. Plus his younger brother was a scary sociopathic creep. Neither could keep their hands to themselves, you didn't go outside alone if it was after dark and they were around.

    Then the guy got another girlfriend and she quickly graduated from girlfriend to fiancee - he finally found someone prepared to marry him! But although she & I had at first been quite friendly to one another, about the time the engagement got announced, she got very cold to me, began to avoid me and manouvre herself so I could never stand next to her man. Not that I was making the slightest effort to, it was weird. I finally heard that she had said to others that she was determined I wasn't going to steal him back. She actually believed I still carried a torch, for someone I'd never felt the slightest warm glow about in the first place!
    They pointedly didn't invite me to the wedding - again, I wouldn't have gone, but it was the deliberate publicly given insult over it that was embarrassing, because (I realise now) it was sending a message to everybody, that despite all my protestations maybe I DID still care for this guy and was also a threat - this flew in the face of everything I stood for as a person.

    Luckily, I was very busy at the time (including with a couple of other guys) and hardly ever crossed paths with this couple. But where in the past I might have asked after this guy, as I would have asked after any member of the group, I had to be careful not to because it made it look as if this girl was right to be concerned about me. And frankly, my main interest in knowing where he was (and hoping he was still involved with her, or someone else) was to know I was safe from him.

    So perhaps your 'sting' in this is what you think other people might be thinking, about whether she is right to feeel the need to flaunt her engagement ring.

    or maybe she's just flashing the ring about to everyone. After all, she may thrive on drama and the need to feel she has "won" and is therefore manufacturing it.

    Another thought - one which I felt was perhaps behind my experience - the guy himself has big-noted his attractiveness to women by using you as an example of someone who has "never got over him". it's a way of making himself seem like a better catch and therefore making sure she really values him more highly, because of the risk that there is still someone else he can go back to, if she doesn't pan out well.

    so, Shari - you are over him; but is he over you? Or do you think he could be adding to his lady's insecurities to make himself feel bigger?

    Marg
     
  13. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Too funny! Don't know if I could pull it off, but it would be fun with-my small circle of friends.
     
  14. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I'm thinking about what you're saying, and really, I don't think there's any sting there...at least not where it involves what people think or DEX. And I know she's insecure. DEX has trouble keeping his pants on, and according to exMIL, that hasn't changed. God only knows what DEX tells her about me. He uses all his "women" to build himself up, so I'm not even going to pretend to know what's going on in either head.
    ***
    I could drop the whole thing and it wouldn't bother me. I'm just playing along with my friends, and happen to find it funny. My friend, the cafe owner, has to deal with DEX and whacky girlfriend on a somewhat regular basis. She has been a wee supporter for almost as long as there's been Wee, and is very put out by the bio's actions; more so by the whacky girlfriend's actions. She and some other friends are having as much fun with it, if not more, than me. I just think its funny.
    ***
    I do have a beef with her, though, and I know exactly what it is. My beef with her is her claimed "connection" to wee and difficult child 1 and the upheaval she has brought into their lives. Even her telling DEX's family that I was sleeping with the man that she's got on the side (who happens to be my husband's cousin!) doesn't bother me. I think that's funny (and have been known to play it up a little). My only beef with her is the chaos she's brought into the kids' lives.
    ***
    Their father is absent and has been for years. No matter how much she wants her fairy tale to be true, its not. She has been with him for a year now, and has plotted to leave him at least 6 times (stats from exMIL). Each time, he talks her into staying and she becomes blind to reality, and starts her happy family dreams again, and wants the rest of us to join in because he's so wonderful, he has changed, he's the best daddy and grandpa in the world, blah blah blah blah.
    ***
    Thanks to her, Wee is now aware that his bio dad is absent. He would have figured it out sometime, but later wouldn't have hurt anything, and up until this, we had been able to keep a positive spin on it.
    ***
    Quite honestly, what I'd like to do is sit down with her and tell her about my life with DEX. Cause hers is just like it. He hasn't changed in 7 years. And as much as I am angry with her for dragging the kids thru the mud, I don't want to see anyone else hurt by DEX. But she hates me by proxy. So be it.
    ***
    So if my friends post a picture of a fake ring on my finger that makes her think I got the better end of the deal, or whatever thought it might provoke, so be it. I'd rather be alone than back with him, so she'd be thinking right.
     
  15. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Swear to you -----I have a bubble gum ring that is like a 40K plastic piece of koi.....I think it would be funnier to wear THAT around town and flaunt IT.

    Kinda like in Tombstone ----when Val Kilmer (plays doctor Holiday) and instead of using a gun uses a tin cup to pretend it's a gun and twirls it all around and makes a complete joke out of the fancy gun work the other cowboy has just done.

    Kinda like saying ---Yes, yes I see your big fancy rock.....see my big bubble gum thing ------same difference. :tongue:;):faint:
     
  16. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Anyone who knows anything about me will know its fake.

    I would shoot any man who presented me with a ring that would cost as much as this one would if it were real. Dang sure wouldn't buy it for myself.

    If someone spends $10k on me, it better be for a horse named Quincy.

    Besides, Wee gives me "beautiful jewelry" all the time, and I wear it proudly.
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2010
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Shari, I so understand exactly what is going on.

    My ex and his exwife and current wife act the same way. Like I care at all about them! He has the "whatevers" to think that I would ever want him back and for some reason was able to convince not one, but two women that I was evil and was out to get him back. LOL. Not even close. He convinced these two women that I was trying to steal his money (HA!) by making him pay child support twice. He told them he was sending the money directly to me and then the state was going after him too. Ya right!

    Then at one point when Billy was in his early 20's, his father convinced him to go up there to live with him. Promised him the moon. I wasnt convinced of anything. I asked to talk to Bill. He refused. I asked to at least talk to him on the computer. Bill told me it was "unseemly for ex's to speak to one and other after divorcing"...lol. I almost peed my pants.
     
  18. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    You got it. Heck, I wouldn't do any of this if the others weren't so involved and thinking its so funny.

    I just happen to think its funny, too.

    As well as stupid, childish, immature...lol

    So is playing ladder tag at the pool, but that's still a royal hoot when you can talk a lifegaurd into letting you.

    Yes, I'm almost 40.
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2010
  19. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh I think its a riot. I would wear I ring the size of texas on my FB page if I had one. I would bet the farm my ex has at least seen my page since Billy is a friend on page...lol. Oh...I should see if Bill is a friend on Billys page. LMBO!
     
  20. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Shari,

    I love your heart. Dude has given me "beautiful jewelry" all his life.....and I have a box...just a white cardboard box that he drew on with a marker....that is more precious to me than anything in my very large (OH DID I TELL YOU I LOVE JEWELRY have an armoire) one.

    At 19 though? I have gotten some very nice pieces....and wear them just as proudly...and he LOOKS for them just like he did the beautiful jewelry.

    But I have to agree with the Quincy thing....2 HOOFS UP!
     
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