Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
suggestions for seriously angry 17 yr.old?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 59261" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>You've had some good advice, although I know nothing will help until he is willing to see the light.</p><p></p><p>I can understand why wilderness camp looks attractive, even if it IS just respite. Don't blame you one bit.</p><p></p><p>Will it help? I don't know. I've not really been in that situation. difficult child 1 was sent on a sort of wilderness camp - the school recommended him and about four other boys, all of whom were 'problems' from the school's point of view. They shoved all these boys together for a week of self-awareness in the Aussie bush, but they never really analysed the presenting problems and so they never really got a handle on what was wrong, hence couldn't help much. It turned out in our case, that the most common presenting problem of the boys sent to camp, was undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome. The campers afterwards formed their own clique and where difficult child 1 USED to hang with some decent, studious, 'normal' kids, after the camp he only hung out with his new best friends - the weirdos. His best mate would do things at school like pour lighter fluid over his hand - and light it. So from that point on, difficult child 1's social interaction at school went wildly downhill.</p><p></p><p>I tell you this to ask you to really check into the camp - have the other campers been fully evaluated, at least at some time? If the camp leaders really know what's eating the kids, they have a better chance of reaching them and producing some benefit. But if some kids have been badly mislabelled, it could impact badly on your son. But then again, could it be much worse?</p><p></p><p>A point of yours - you said, "uses race card all the time, he's mixed black/white. Wants it all handed to him, very impulsive". </p><p>I've had kids use this on me - "You're only picking on me because I'm black" - when I frankly didn't even notice their colour. My response - to play the race card ALL the time is itself racist and a cop-out.</p><p>A question - are you also mixed, or one-or-the-other? He could be blaming you for whichever side of his colour he doesn't value. It could be a way of getting at whichever parent contributed most of the black, in his point of view. Stupid idea, but that's kids for you, especially when they're being unreasonable, unfair and trying to hurt you. If you're also mixed, you could try, "Hey, buddy, at least you're male. Do you know the level of discrimination for a WOMAN in your position? And do you hear ME blaming others for my failings?"</p><p>I don't know - just a stupid idea from me, maybe. I'm not in the US and here is an area where I really can't understand what you're dealing with from personal experience. We do have discrimination here, but it's a different flavour entirely.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 59261, member: 1991"] You've had some good advice, although I know nothing will help until he is willing to see the light. I can understand why wilderness camp looks attractive, even if it IS just respite. Don't blame you one bit. Will it help? I don't know. I've not really been in that situation. difficult child 1 was sent on a sort of wilderness camp - the school recommended him and about four other boys, all of whom were 'problems' from the school's point of view. They shoved all these boys together for a week of self-awareness in the Aussie bush, but they never really analysed the presenting problems and so they never really got a handle on what was wrong, hence couldn't help much. It turned out in our case, that the most common presenting problem of the boys sent to camp, was undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome. The campers afterwards formed their own clique and where difficult child 1 USED to hang with some decent, studious, 'normal' kids, after the camp he only hung out with his new best friends - the weirdos. His best mate would do things at school like pour lighter fluid over his hand - and light it. So from that point on, difficult child 1's social interaction at school went wildly downhill. I tell you this to ask you to really check into the camp - have the other campers been fully evaluated, at least at some time? If the camp leaders really know what's eating the kids, they have a better chance of reaching them and producing some benefit. But if some kids have been badly mislabelled, it could impact badly on your son. But then again, could it be much worse? A point of yours - you said, "uses race card all the time, he's mixed black/white. Wants it all handed to him, very impulsive". I've had kids use this on me - "You're only picking on me because I'm black" - when I frankly didn't even notice their colour. My response - to play the race card ALL the time is itself racist and a cop-out. A question - are you also mixed, or one-or-the-other? He could be blaming you for whichever side of his colour he doesn't value. It could be a way of getting at whichever parent contributed most of the black, in his point of view. Stupid idea, but that's kids for you, especially when they're being unreasonable, unfair and trying to hurt you. If you're also mixed, you could try, "Hey, buddy, at least you're male. Do you know the level of discrimination for a WOMAN in your position? And do you hear ME blaming others for my failings?" I don't know - just a stupid idea from me, maybe. I'm not in the US and here is an area where I really can't understand what you're dealing with from personal experience. We do have discrimination here, but it's a different flavour entirely. Marg [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
suggestions for seriously angry 17 yr.old?
Top