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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 279045" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>You need to talk to husband and come to a compromise. WHat you say -</p><p></p><p>"As you know, I am concerned that we're missing something with difficult child. I know you don't agree with me. I really hope I'm wrong, but if I am right, then the sooner we know for sure, the sooner we can put in place something that will help. ODD is supposed to be unrtreatable and incurable - what if there is something underneath it that IS treatable? Wouldn't it be great to be able to see an improvement in difficult child?</p><p>So here is what I propose - I won't stop worrying about this until my mind is put at rest. So let's organise to have difficult child assessed toroughly. All information will be useful, even if they find there is absolutely nothing wrong. We would still get valuable information on difficult child's abilities, strengths & weaknesses as well as potential career paths. It would be ain investment in our child's future even if no problem is found. And if a problem IS found - then we will know NOW and not later on when it's too late to help. If there is nothing wrong found - then I will know for sure and will stop worrying. You will then have every reason to remind me that I was wrong, every time I bring the subject up again."</p><p></p><p>Also, where possible, try to get husband to attend the consult with you. Encourage husband to express his scepticism to the neuropsychologist. A good scientific analysis needs to be balanced with full and frank disclosure. This full and frank stuff means they you don't just tell the therapist the bad stuff, you tell them EVERYTHING.</p><p></p><p>When difficult child 3 had his first neuropsychologist assessment, I took mother in law along. She was definitely against the idea that there was anything wrong with her darling grandson and told the team so (multidisciplinary team). However, when we read the report, there is stuff that mother in law told them that they have listed to substantiate their diagnosis. Without realising it, she actually pleaded their case!</p><p></p><p>Welcome out of the closet. I hope we can help you here.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 279045, member: 1991"] You need to talk to husband and come to a compromise. WHat you say - "As you know, I am concerned that we're missing something with difficult child. I know you don't agree with me. I really hope I'm wrong, but if I am right, then the sooner we know for sure, the sooner we can put in place something that will help. ODD is supposed to be unrtreatable and incurable - what if there is something underneath it that IS treatable? Wouldn't it be great to be able to see an improvement in difficult child? So here is what I propose - I won't stop worrying about this until my mind is put at rest. So let's organise to have difficult child assessed toroughly. All information will be useful, even if they find there is absolutely nothing wrong. We would still get valuable information on difficult child's abilities, strengths & weaknesses as well as potential career paths. It would be ain investment in our child's future even if no problem is found. And if a problem IS found - then we will know NOW and not later on when it's too late to help. If there is nothing wrong found - then I will know for sure and will stop worrying. You will then have every reason to remind me that I was wrong, every time I bring the subject up again." Also, where possible, try to get husband to attend the consult with you. Encourage husband to express his scepticism to the neuropsychologist. A good scientific analysis needs to be balanced with full and frank disclosure. This full and frank stuff means they you don't just tell the therapist the bad stuff, you tell them EVERYTHING. When difficult child 3 had his first neuropsychologist assessment, I took mother in law along. She was definitely against the idea that there was anything wrong with her darling grandson and told the team so (multidisciplinary team). However, when we read the report, there is stuff that mother in law told them that they have listed to substantiate their diagnosis. Without realising it, she actually pleaded their case! Welcome out of the closet. I hope we can help you here. Marg [/QUOTE]
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