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Support vs. Punishment....
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<blockquote data-quote="LittleDudesMom" data-source="post: 108154" data-attributes="member: 805"><p>Misk,</p><p></p><p>How many full days has your son missed this year? How many times has he been sent home? Depending upon your answer, it may be time to work with the school on a better plan.</p><p></p><p>I totally understand where you are here. I was in the same place a little over four years ago. The classroom was cleared on numerous occasions; not because difficult child was threatening anyone, but because his actions could be a threat to the other children. It is absolutely heartbreaking as a parent to know that other students look at your child in fear.</p><p></p><p>My ex, commonly referred to as bonehead, was also against medications and against the adhd diagnosis. However, I persisted and insisted that he accompany me to a therapy appointment and speak with the therapist himself. He accompanied me to the appointment and came out agreeing with the diagnosis and the addition of medications. Now, his school issues came after the addition of medications, so medications are not a guarantee that the behaviors will instantly end.</p><p></p><p>Finding the correct medications in the correct amount, therapy, behavior modification, self awareness, The Explosive Child, and working hand in hand with his teachers and the administration, all played a part in lessening the frequency and severity of difficult child's behaviors.</p><p></p><p>In regards to discipline, I always had, and continue to have, a very simple rule. If he has been given consequences for his behavior at school, then the punishment is done. If, however, he invades someone's personal space (i.e., getting in someone's face, hitting, kicking, bumping, etc.) then all bets are off. The school can punish and so will I. Everything that has a power switch (radio, tv, gameboy, etc.) is taken away for as long as I feel the infraction deserves. If I have to go and pick him up from school, he must do reading or schoolwork until the same time that the other kids would be getting out of school.</p><p></p><p>He knows these consequences and following them without deviation is very important. </p><p></p><p>I certainly hope you can talk ex into going along to the next doctor appointment. For some reason bonehead believe the therapists before he would trust me!!!!</p><p></p><p>Sharon</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LittleDudesMom, post: 108154, member: 805"] Misk, How many full days has your son missed this year? How many times has he been sent home? Depending upon your answer, it may be time to work with the school on a better plan. I totally understand where you are here. I was in the same place a little over four years ago. The classroom was cleared on numerous occasions; not because difficult child was threatening anyone, but because his actions could be a threat to the other children. It is absolutely heartbreaking as a parent to know that other students look at your child in fear. My ex, commonly referred to as bonehead, was also against medications and against the adhd diagnosis. However, I persisted and insisted that he accompany me to a therapy appointment and speak with the therapist himself. He accompanied me to the appointment and came out agreeing with the diagnosis and the addition of medications. Now, his school issues came after the addition of medications, so medications are not a guarantee that the behaviors will instantly end. Finding the correct medications in the correct amount, therapy, behavior modification, self awareness, The Explosive Child, and working hand in hand with his teachers and the administration, all played a part in lessening the frequency and severity of difficult child's behaviors. In regards to discipline, I always had, and continue to have, a very simple rule. If he has been given consequences for his behavior at school, then the punishment is done. If, however, he invades someone's personal space (i.e., getting in someone's face, hitting, kicking, bumping, etc.) then all bets are off. The school can punish and so will I. Everything that has a power switch (radio, tv, gameboy, etc.) is taken away for as long as I feel the infraction deserves. If I have to go and pick him up from school, he must do reading or schoolwork until the same time that the other kids would be getting out of school. He knows these consequences and following them without deviation is very important. I certainly hope you can talk ex into going along to the next doctor appointment. For some reason bonehead believe the therapists before he would trust me!!!! Sharon [/QUOTE]
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