Sweet momentos....

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by timer lady, Aug 20, 2009.

  1. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    As it rained all day yesterday & driving anywhere was not on my list of things to do I started going through some personal things.

    I found a box of memories from my early days with husband. In there I found a mug from The Rusty Pelican - a Seattle restaurant where husband & I had our first official date. I'm sipping my hmj from it even as we speak - for some reason it's making me smile this morning.

    I also found husband's wallet mixed in with a box of things & in it I found the napkin that husband wrote my phone number on from the night we met. Our in common hair dresser introduced us at a bar & grill in the U district We just happened to be there waiting for a bus - all 3 of us heading out to different parties. husband & I never went to our parties but sat & talked until closing time. He escorted me home before he headed home himself. I was honored but somehow not surprised that husband held onto that napkin all those years.

    These items gave me a sense of peace for the first time since husband died. I cannot tell you why.
  2. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Linda, I am glad you are able to enjoy the memories of husband that you found in a box. Awesome. See what time can do? Take the time to smile at past memories. Cry, too.

    Share whenever you want to!


  3. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Perhaps, Linda, it showed that even though the disease of alcohol ruled your husband's brain (disallowing him to make the right choices about his and his family's life), his heart never let go of the love he carried for you. It would be a comfort to me were I in your shoes.

  4. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Linda, I am glad you are finding comfort in the beautiful memories. I am hoping that you continue to heal your heart and your spirit. You are never far from my thoughts.
  5. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Oh Linda...things like that are so wonderful. To other people they may just be a mug or an old napkin but to you, they are priceless. I'm so glad you have them.

    I have things like that from a couple of people in my life and I'll never get rid of them. They are technically worthless as far as money goes but they fall in that "what I would grab on my way out if there was a fire" category.

    Enjoy your HMJ, frame that napkin and enjoy the good memories. I agree with LDM...this just shows husband's love for you.
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    How wonderful that you can travel back to the wonderful days with the props of love right there on the table in front of you. Lovely. DDD
  7. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Linda, how very lovely.
    It seems that you happened upon those mementoes just when you needed them.

    What a beautiful symbol of how much your husband loved you.
  8. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I don't have the written down phone number as husband wrote mine down on the back of his hand, LoL (We met at a cast party after a local theater production. He was the star and I was a stagehand).

    What I do have are years and years of the tiny notebooks on which husband wrote down his "need to do" lists. He was extremely ADD (Probably why he did so well in the military--set rules) and lived by those little notebooks.

    I have everything from how to run formations and formal troop counselling and discipline to how to open and shut down professional kitchens (he was a chef as a civilian).

    All of it written down in tiny writing that these days I can barely read.

    It's funny, back when US Robotics (modem maker) bought out Palm (then the makers of a handheld electronic organizer), I took one of their first models home because I thought it would be easier for husband to use.

    Despite him being very techie, he preferred to stick to his little notebooks.

    I still pull them out on occasion to look at them and husband died seven years ago. There were no conflicted feelings around his death. He died after years of suffering from a very rare and horrific blood disorder
  9. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    How very sweet, Linda.
  10. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm smiling here for you. How sweet that he kept the napkin all these years. Hugs.
  11. graceupongrace

    graceupongrace New Member

    What a nice reminder of your sweet times with husband. And just when it seems you need it most. Hugs to you, Linda.
  12. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Oh Linda.........I know exactly, EXACTLY why it gave you peace. If only I could put it into words. It is like a shred of his soul is present with you again.

    As you know I have little of H., but today my mom emailed me to say a friend had sent to my Mom H.'s favorite childhood teddy bear. I don't know how this friend got it, or why she had it all this time, but it made me cry and laugh at the same time. I so remember H's Paddington, with his scrunched up nose, and worn fur............that was/is H. And to be hug him, will make me feel all that much closer to her.

    I am so glad you found his mementos. What a sweet spiritual reminder that husband is there. In every place you are - he is.
  13. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    Oh, Linda! I so "get" what you are saying. There's something about a long relationship that is hard to explain. I remember raging one day, having decided to leave. I separated "my" possessions from "his", placing them in the cabinet I had painted when I was missing him while he was an intern. How symbolic is that? I spent a lot of time deciding what was meaningful to me and to him and placed the stupid stuff in the symbol of our joint suffering....
  14. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    What a great memory! Ahhhh! I hope you find more sprinkled around your belongings as you continue to work through your home.
  15. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    I spoke with my therapist today - she agreed that these momentos are special. Frame the napkin & hang it up & use the cup as much as I want.

    husband did love me ~ he lost his battle to addiction and deep down inside he loved me & the kids. I have to hang onto that or I swear I'll lose my mind.

    Since I found these items I'm not as agitated or frightened. I'm not sure if that will last long yet I'll hang on to those feelings as well.

    Just what a battered soul needed right now. Thank you ladies.
  16. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    I missed this post. (been busy all week). I'm so glad you found that box. What a blessing! You needed that right now. I'm smiling all over for you!