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The Watercooler
Talked to husband last night. Ideas? Thoughts? Am I expecting too much?
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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 418799" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>Ahhh. Misunderstood the direction you were taking there.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, you ARE a "fixer". Just like me. And when we say yes too much, put too much on our plates, and then finally ask for help - we expect it to be given 'cause that is how WE are.</p><p> </p><p>I had to stop myself the other night when husband was cooking... I started to tell him how to do something... And I realized... Nope. He's doing it, if he needs help he'll ask. My husband and yours are not the same, though. Some similarities, but different.</p><p> </p><p>Problem: You are o-ver-whelmed. Too much to do. Not enough Shari. So you subconsciously expect the slack to be picked up. And that's just not how your husband sees it. <strong>In fact, he <em>doesn't</em> see it - at all.</strong> Temporary solution? Stop doing <em>for</em> him. Do your stuff, and Wee's. Your level of overwhelmed will drop, then stabilize into doable. Warning: this is VERY.HARD.TO.DO. I know, first hand. And it's still hard.</p><p> </p><p>You can't fix him. And you've stopped with the cars... Expand that out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 418799, member: 6705"] Ahhh. Misunderstood the direction you were taking there. Yes, you ARE a "fixer". Just like me. And when we say yes too much, put too much on our plates, and then finally ask for help - we expect it to be given 'cause that is how WE are. I had to stop myself the other night when husband was cooking... I started to tell him how to do something... And I realized... Nope. He's doing it, if he needs help he'll ask. My husband and yours are not the same, though. Some similarities, but different. Problem: You are o-ver-whelmed. Too much to do. Not enough Shari. So you subconsciously expect the slack to be picked up. And that's just not how your husband sees it. [B]In fact, he [I]doesn't[/I] see it - at all.[/B] Temporary solution? Stop doing [I]for[/I] him. Do your stuff, and Wee's. Your level of overwhelmed will drop, then stabilize into doable. Warning: this is VERY.HARD.TO.DO. I know, first hand. And it's still hard. You can't fix him. And you've stopped with the cars... Expand that out. [/QUOTE]
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Talked to husband last night. Ideas? Thoughts? Am I expecting too much?
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