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General Parenting
Teenage meltdowns, homework and gaming
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<blockquote data-quote="BloodiedButUnbowed" data-source="post: 750195" data-attributes="member: 13303"><p>I just wanted to say that I see many similarities between my oldest stepson DS, and your description of your son. I have no answers, just empathy. I agree with the suggestions you've received above. I hope that you find them useful. I would definitely consider family therapy if you are not already doing that.</p><p></p><p>If my family's experience is any guide, I would urge you to do whatever is necessary NOT to give in to him when he tantrums, even if it involves calling the authorities. My DS - also a very physically large and intimidating young man - is now facing felony charges because he was trained from a young age to use his size and his temper to get his way. In our case this has escalated from refusing to do homework, and refusing to attend school, at age 16, to now as a young adult facing possible prison time. In my opinion had his biological parents been willing to set a firm limit around his behavior - to the point of sending him to a therapeutic placement if necessary - this sad outcome may have been preventable. Not to mention the damage done to siblings. We have suffered this as well.</p><p></p><p>So find whatever works for your family, but don't teach him that he can bully you into submission. While it may "work" in the context of your family it will not fly in the real world where the consequences will be much harsher.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BloodiedButUnbowed, post: 750195, member: 13303"] I just wanted to say that I see many similarities between my oldest stepson DS, and your description of your son. I have no answers, just empathy. I agree with the suggestions you've received above. I hope that you find them useful. I would definitely consider family therapy if you are not already doing that. If my family's experience is any guide, I would urge you to do whatever is necessary NOT to give in to him when he tantrums, even if it involves calling the authorities. My DS - also a very physically large and intimidating young man - is now facing felony charges because he was trained from a young age to use his size and his temper to get his way. In our case this has escalated from refusing to do homework, and refusing to attend school, at age 16, to now as a young adult facing possible prison time. In my opinion had his biological parents been willing to set a firm limit around his behavior - to the point of sending him to a therapeutic placement if necessary - this sad outcome may have been preventable. Not to mention the damage done to siblings. We have suffered this as well. So find whatever works for your family, but don't teach him that he can bully you into submission. While it may "work" in the context of your family it will not fly in the real world where the consequences will be much harsher. [/QUOTE]
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