That sick feeling in my stomach
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Such great ideas, and I read some of them after I had sent a very careful email to the sp. ed teacher who had called and said all was ok but she was just letting me know of the situation that had happened, and the administrator who works with sp. needs kids in discipline....I did include the concern that the BIP was not followed as we had discussed, that the principal should be at our triweekly meetings to be able to take advantage of all of the expertise that is there so he can share his concerns and realize that things are being addressed appropriately, and that the entire team needs to be on the same page.
they both wrote back...teacher saying he had a pretty good day, and administrator cc-ing me as a member of the team an email that said basically...if (child) becomes physical with another child or staff member the office is to be notified immediately and his mom is to be called. she supports this as it is the most effective way to help (child)...
HUH????? I did a reply all and said something like...thanks for keeping all of the team members in the loop. I want to clarify that this memo is not representing a change in the behavior plan, simply a reminder so we are all on the same page. That said, I would like to make sure we define the behavior we are concerned about and if there are any questions we can add it to the next meeting agenda.
I reminded them that the "zones" program he is on is designed to teach him that when he is in the red zone he needs to turn it around and get back to yellow and preferably green. When he does he is to be praised for doing so. IF we then punish him for having gone into the red zone he will give up....this is exactly what he said he wanted to die for...he is so worried every day that if he can't be "good" all day then he will be kicked out. His biggest fear because he loves his routine. He will always have some inappropriate behaviors and so I reminded them that what we agreed to in our meetings was I would be called on days where for some physical/neurological reason he can't get out of the red zone and/or he is at risk of a safety concern...seriously hurting self or others. He pats people on the back, shoves in lines if kids touch him, etc....those are not go home behaviors. I said I didn't actually think anyone was wanting the program to change to a situation where he would go home daily...that was nobody's intention (I am really not sure about the principal though)...I reminded them that the autism specialist told us the first year would likely be spent teaching him what the zones were and he has to be there to learn them. I am always willing to go to school if they call and need me. But I added that if this becomes a routine way of managing his behavior --and I specified if it went over 10 times --then we would have to reconsider what the antecedent and methods are regarding this issue. Actuallythe recent "hits" have been in the same class which has always been an issue so not a huge brain puzzler....gym just so too overwhelming for him even on a one to one basis.
So thanks everyone....great to be validated and to have support for those points....I will (and have) contact the state if there is another issue....In one district he got locked in an isolation room (he was 31 lbs and in 1st grade, it was over a power struggle and the aide wanted him to stop wiggling his feet....no aggression, no safety issues, anyway the entire district ended up in trouble. and policies were changed).
I like that....warrior mom....I do feel that way much of the time.
Again many thanks! you are all great and I love the different perspectives. It helps sort through my racing mind so much.
they both wrote back...teacher saying he had a pretty good day, and administrator cc-ing me as a member of the team an email that said basically...if (child) becomes physical with another child or staff member the office is to be notified immediately and his mom is to be called. she supports this as it is the most effective way to help (child)...
HUH????? I did a reply all and said something like...thanks for keeping all of the team members in the loop. I want to clarify that this memo is not representing a change in the behavior plan, simply a reminder so we are all on the same page. That said, I would like to make sure we define the behavior we are concerned about and if there are any questions we can add it to the next meeting agenda.
I reminded them that the "zones" program he is on is designed to teach him that when he is in the red zone he needs to turn it around and get back to yellow and preferably green. When he does he is to be praised for doing so. IF we then punish him for having gone into the red zone he will give up....this is exactly what he said he wanted to die for...he is so worried every day that if he can't be "good" all day then he will be kicked out. His biggest fear because he loves his routine. He will always have some inappropriate behaviors and so I reminded them that what we agreed to in our meetings was I would be called on days where for some physical/neurological reason he can't get out of the red zone and/or he is at risk of a safety concern...seriously hurting self or others. He pats people on the back, shoves in lines if kids touch him, etc....those are not go home behaviors. I said I didn't actually think anyone was wanting the program to change to a situation where he would go home daily...that was nobody's intention (I am really not sure about the principal though)...I reminded them that the autism specialist told us the first year would likely be spent teaching him what the zones were and he has to be there to learn them. I am always willing to go to school if they call and need me. But I added that if this becomes a routine way of managing his behavior --and I specified if it went over 10 times --then we would have to reconsider what the antecedent and methods are regarding this issue. Actuallythe recent "hits" have been in the same class which has always been an issue so not a huge brain puzzler....gym just so too overwhelming for him even on a one to one basis.
So thanks everyone....great to be validated and to have support for those points....I will (and have) contact the state if there is another issue....In one district he got locked in an isolation room (he was 31 lbs and in 1st grade, it was over a power struggle and the aide wanted him to stop wiggling his feet....no aggression, no safety issues, anyway the entire district ended up in trouble. and policies were changed).
I like that....warrior mom....I do feel that way much of the time.
Again many thanks! you are all great and I love the different perspectives. It helps sort through my racing mind so much.
