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The adult child who left is back...sort of...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 615492" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Thanks, Lisa. I am aware that it is not your usual reason to "friend" somebody...lol. I think this need for total control is a part of attachment issues. I have gone to some really top notch psychologists over this issue. One is an expert in adopted children and only sees adopted children and their families, as they have unique problems and most psychologists really are not that aware of how this can impact a child. In his case, he was not adopted until age six, which is after a young child has developed. His lack of ability to forgive transgressions that others are so willing to take responsibility for is astounding to me, but, then, his background makes him a totally black and white thinker. There is no middle ground. God knows, we had a few arguments during the wedding time, but it was not the sort of stuff that causes total breaks in relationships. </p><p></p><p>I hope his boys turn out the way he wants. God help either if he is gay. And what if one rejects his beliefs? S. can be very kind and caring until you do something he doesn't like. It has been over six years now and he is still punishing me and I sort of know why, but not really. And, yes, if it hadn't been one thing it would have been another.</p><p></p><p>Frankly, for all that he believes through his church teachings that the man is the head of the house and the woman must submit or follow, his wife runs the show.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 615492, member: 1550"] Thanks, Lisa. I am aware that it is not your usual reason to "friend" somebody...lol. I think this need for total control is a part of attachment issues. I have gone to some really top notch psychologists over this issue. One is an expert in adopted children and only sees adopted children and their families, as they have unique problems and most psychologists really are not that aware of how this can impact a child. In his case, he was not adopted until age six, which is after a young child has developed. His lack of ability to forgive transgressions that others are so willing to take responsibility for is astounding to me, but, then, his background makes him a totally black and white thinker. There is no middle ground. God knows, we had a few arguments during the wedding time, but it was not the sort of stuff that causes total breaks in relationships. I hope his boys turn out the way he wants. God help either if he is gay. And what if one rejects his beliefs? S. can be very kind and caring until you do something he doesn't like. It has been over six years now and he is still punishing me and I sort of know why, but not really. And, yes, if it hadn't been one thing it would have been another. Frankly, for all that he believes through his church teachings that the man is the head of the house and the woman must submit or follow, his wife runs the show. [/QUOTE]
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