The football moron who beat up his girlfriend and is banned indefinitely

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by MidwestMom, Sep 10, 2014.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    So now there is a video of him knocking her out in the elevator then dragging her out of it when it lands. And she is DEFENDING him.

    Do you think he deserves an indefinite ban? It really doesn't have anything to do with football except for the game's image. In baseball, some pitcher, I think on Pittsburgh or some guy who was a visitor and was playing Pittsburgh (Houston?), beat up his wife or girlferiend a few years ago and I don't think his punishment was as severe, although he is obviously just as bad.

    Do you think domestic abuse off the field should impact a player being able to play a professional sport? I actually do think so. Football is so popular and when you sign up to play you are going to be watched and you know it. I think it's ok to severely punish players who are violent, although this may be the first time it really happened (severe punishment).

    Maybe I'm more into football than other I don't know if this post will get responses or not. I'll wait and see :)
  2. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    The funny thing is that she actually made a statement apologizing for her role in it. In his statement, he is not saying sorry, only that people should leave his family alone. I bet in private he still blames her and here she is saying sorry.
    I think it's sad in every way. I think if you're a role model, and you are representing things, if you do something like that then a football team, or anything, won't want you representing their name. It's the bottom dollar for everyone. That's the reason he's not on the team. I'm sure the team did all they could to not release that tape of the elevator.
    Little kids are coming into school asking me if I have seen the Ray Rice video. (why is this font sideways?) Kids are seeing this. So yeah, because children have seen it there needs to be a strong punishmnet
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Too bad the other wife abusers are given a slap on the hand just because they are in the public eye. Bet if a really big name player had done this, he wouldn't have been punished so severely. I think what Michael Vick did was hideous, but a few teams still wanted him. If my team had signed him, I would have never supported them again. I'm sure he's no prince with women either. Anyone who can kill dogs and laugh about the cruelty of how they are doing it is a big risk as a psychopath.

    Rice's wife is a typical wife who doesn't care enough about herself to see he is a bad man. She must have extremely low self-esteem. Bet one day she divorces him. Bet they are still very young, which is no excuse.
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I think it is wonderful that they have banned him. In order for him to even be possibly eligible he should have to go through mandatory therapy - group and individual - for a long time, and he should have to STAY in therapy for as long as he is playing.

    There really is therapy that can help. Even if the person says it isn't helping, some can and will sink in. He should have to be monitored somehow, and SHE should have to have therapy also.

    I would LOVE to see Robin McGraw step in to help this woman. Her programs seem to be very effective - I know our DV center LOVES her work. She has an amazing app that doesn't look like it is anything an abuser would object to, but it calls for help at the tuoch of a button and it records what is going on in the room so that there is proof of what is happening, at least audio of it.

    The wife needs help and prayers and support as she truly has no clue that she has value as a person and she is blind to the sickness in her relationship. Hopefully in time she will wise up and either leave or insist that they both go to therapy.

    It is about time professional sports addressed this issue and set a boundary for pro athletes. It is NOT 'private business' or 'a family affair'. Domestic violence impacts all of our lives and hiding behind the lie that it is private family business is just an abuser's way of trying to get away with it with no real consequences. Maybe this guy will one day see that being forced to get real help for this has kept him off death row or out of prison for life for murdering his wife. IF he gets real help and IF he changes and IF he doesn't kill her, that is. At least if he does kill her, there is documentation that the abuse happened and he had a chance to get the help that can stop the abuse.

    I hope and pray that the woman and any kids involved can get away from him safely and stay away safely.
  5. mom_to_3

    mom_to_3 Active Member

    I too think this is disgusting! I'm wondering why this animal has not been arrested for domestic violence???? The proof is there!
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I think his wife has to press charges.
  7. mom_to_3

    mom_to_3 Active Member

    It looks like he was indicted on one count of aggravated assault in March, Mr. Rice pleaded not guilty to the felony charge. They sure are dragging their feet.
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Yeah, a few players were accused of rape, but not found guilty. They were unscathed. Of course, they had to let it go because he was found not guilty. But I wonder. I think some of these big shot kids get an attitude and think they can do what they want without anything happening to them.
  9. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    If these players don't have a morals clause in their contracts, they should have! Anyone who has been convicted of a violent crime has no business playing professional sports! Domestic violence is a CRIME, a very violent crime! And you know that this was no isolated incident with him. He didn't even claim that it was. He didn't just snap that one day and haul off and knock her out for the very first time. He is probably physically abusive to her all the time and she's used to it.

    Actually it is not at all unusual for domestic violence victims to excuse their abuser, to refuse to press charges, to remain in the abusive relationship, even to take the blame themselves. That's all part of it. It's hard to understand if you've never been through it yourself, but after years of being told that it's all your fault, that your actions caused him to do it, you actually start to believe it. I did. You actually start wondering what you are doing wrong to make him treat you so badly! After a while in a relationship like that, you have no self confidence left, no self esteem, you feel worthless. And the question, "Why does she stay?" has as many answers as there are women. He may have threatened to harm her or her family if she leaves or threatened to take her children away. She may rely on him for financial support and feels like she will never succeed on her own. And she's very afraid of him! Statistically, the most dangerous time for an abused woman is when she leaves! None of her behavior surprises me at all.

    And he is a disgusting piece of garbage! He should never again be able to be the highly paid sports hero who is supposed to be a role model for children!

    And incidentally, if there is enough physical evidence of an assault, physical injuries, or in this case having the whole thing on videotape, the police can file charges on him, whether she wants them to or not, whether she files charges herself or not. It's out of her hands. Good!
  10. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Ummm Ray Rice is a VERY major player in football. He was one of the key players for the Super Bowl winning Ravens.

    Sports has had its fair share of problem children in it for awhile. The league has had problems coming up with appropriate punishments. I think they have been all over the board in some cases. I think there needs to be a strict guide. You get charged with domestic abuse one time and you are suspended for X amount of games, convicted for a second time and you are banned for life. Better make sure that college degree counts for something.

    On the other hand they have some stupid rules. One player accidentally shot himself and he ended up not only getting jail time but getting barred from playing when he got out of jail. Yet Vick can be bleep bleep bleep dog fighter and he gets a 50 million dollar contract to play for the Eagles. I dont think he should have ever been able to come back to football.

    Drugs are another thing. One poor dude got suspended for 6 games because he took Clomid for infertility. WTH?
  11. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    It is all about the money and winning. Coaches will keep quiet about players doing illegal things until it comes out in public, and then they deny they knew anything. It seems to be happening more and more.
  12. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    I just read in an article that although it isn't clear, it appears in the video, he may have spat on her while she was unconscious.

    I hope it goes to trial....didn't someone say he could be charged without the wife pressing charges? How many times have we said "if only we had a video...."

    The entire ordeal is so sick and sad. The wife's comments / co dependent behaviors, etc. are so very disturbing.

    And this apparent BS from the football league re: the video. I recall early on people on the radio were saying they saw the video and it was outrageous. So, what happened?

    I've worked with kids before...these guys really are role models and they get paid more than physicians. Disgusting and profoundly disturbing.

    Certainly our values are really mixed up.

    I'm not sure what I think, but if Rice went to trial, served jail time, community service and had lots of counseling, do you think you would be okay with a return to football down the road?
    Last edited: Sep 11, 2014
  13. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    I personally don't think the sport leagues should punish their players in any way for out of sport issues. I simply don't think it really is any of their business.

    However, I certainly do think that the team should kick the player out for this type of behaviour (and it is a breach of contract in any pro athlete contracts I know of, so totally legitimate) and I would really hate it, if the team I support would hire a player like that.

    The sport related things are league business, though many major sports are total sissies about that. Best example was last Olympics. Swedish hockey player got caught for very clear cut doping violation. He got off scot free though any cross country skier etc. would had banned for two years and probably also faced criminal prosecution for using that exact same substance. This player had absolutely no consequences either by his NHL team or International hockey federation, simply because they wanted to keep NHL players in Olympics so much, they were willing to let any performance-enchancing drug violation go, because NA pro sports do too.

    If the leagues start to give banns for out of sport reasons, they need to also take care of due process-issues. They have ways to do so with sport related issues, not so much with out of sport issues. In this case it is quite clear, that this douchebag beat his wife, but in many cases it may be difficult to draw a line. Is it enough if someone is accused or charged about something? What if charges are dropped or person is found not guilty by court? What will the league do, if they have banned someone for example for a year and it is found that allegations were not true? There are also lots of false allegations against people, especially if one making the allegation has something to gain from it. (And even more crimes athletes or other celebrities do commit and never get caught, but that is another thing.)

    I personally know one person who used to be a star athlete in my country (he coached my son later) that got to lots of trouble by false allegation and it took quite a lot of time before it was found to be false and even that was just luck. He and his team mate were accused of rape that never happened, by person who wanted the fame in any cost. They could had easily ended up with not guilty by lack of evidence conviction and everyone would had assumed it meant guilty but getting free because of lack of evidence, which would have made it impossible to have careers they have now after the sport careers. Having to prove yourself not guilty can be impossible even when you are. These are very difficult questions and that is why I don't like it, when someone else than court takes a job of the court.
  14. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    I am not a sports star. I am a teacher. I would be fired for this type of behavior. There is a morality clause in our contracts. This should be the case in any job.
  15. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Spot on. And I'm not buying the excuse that they somehow had the video of the punch since April but no one bothered to look at it so they were unaware of it. BS. That's where the Commissioner needs to retire. If he did see it, why say all along that he hadn't? If he didn't see it - and they did have it all along - why doesn't he have enough control over his people that they brought it to his attention?
  16. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I don't think he should come back. I didn't even think Vick should have come back. I don't believe in second chances when it is violence and there is no remorse... and you are in the spotlight, with kids worshiping you. If you don't want an audience, be an accountant or a janitor.
  17. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    Did anyone else watch David Letterman last night? He had Dr. Phil on and they were talking about this incident. Dr. Phil was saying many of the same things, why so many of these women stay with their abusers, how they are really in much more danger when they leave, how the abusers isolate their victims from their support systems of family and friends, and how this girls'
    behavior is so very typical of victims of serious domestic violence. He said that when they leave, it needs to be planned out - money saved, transportation lined up, a safe place to stay arranged, etc.

    I think this thing with some profession athletes is a little different than with ordinary guys who abuse women. Some of them may have grown up in a home where they saw women in their families being abused. But these elite athletes come up through a unique culture. They are praised and glorified for their accomplishments, most of them starting in high school. So many times their bad behavior is overlooked or excused and they learn that the rules don't apply to them. It carries over to college where they are even more glorified, many more misdeeds swept under the rug because the rules don't apply to them. I saw this myself when I was in college - star football players who all owned bright, shiny convertibles and made straight A's taking classes like basket weaving and folk dancing! True story! If the make it to the pro's, they're even more convinced that they are the big, strong, invincible supermen who can do exactly as they please with no consequences whatsoever because the rules don't apply to them. They're rich and famous and untouchable. And someone will cover for them.

    Certainly the colleges and pro sports leagues are as much to blame for sweeping it under the rug. OF COURSE the team had seen the video of him knocking her out in the elevator! They just chose to ignore it until the poopie hit the fan and it all came out. And I don't know if this story was carried nationally or if it was just on here locally, but a while back four star football players from Vanderbilt University were accused of rape. They had drugged and then raped a young female student in a dorm room. The story finally leaked out but it was quite a while before they were even dropped from the team. And now, even with rape charges hanging over their heads, two of them transferred to other universities, were welcomed with open arms, and were playing football for their new schools! After a loud public outcry, one was finally dropped off the team by the head coach who claimed to have had no knowledge of the rape charges his new player was facing. Yeah, right! Until that attitude changes, this will go on and on and on ...
  18. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    It seems that being a professional football player is almost training ground for narcissists or worse. Rich, famous, someone will cover for them, ignore the facts, sweep horrible things under the rug...what Donna said....all true. All so sickening!
  19. mom_to_3

    mom_to_3 Active Member

    They definitely have plenty of evidence this time Donna. The whole thing, what set him off (no excuse) him beating the snot out of her and then after the fact, standing around talking to other people offering her no aide. It's all there for them. It's almost as criminal for the legal authorities to not charge him immediately as it was for Rice to assault his wife.

    And incidentally, if there is enough physical evidence of an assault, physical injuries, or in this case having the whole thing on videotape, the police can file charges on him, whether she wants them to or not, whether she files charges herself or not. It's out of her hands. Good![/quote]
  20. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    The prosecutors office was never going to give him jail time according to them. Michael Vick was in jail, the people in general could forgive him because he had a punishment. He did his time. Rice isn't getting time so he can never serve any punishment, and he won't be forgiven. He will never play football again even if his suspension is lifted. Teams would LOVE to have him, but not worth it because it will affect their pocketbook.

    These players are treated like gods their entire lives...since Pee-Wee football. They can do no wrong! They can walk on water and it rains gold. If anything bad happens, throw some money at it, it will go away. Can you imagine that? From age 5 up.

    We were told at work..don't do anything you wouldn't like to see on a video. Everyone has phones and is watching everyone else. And, most importantly, some people want their 15 minutes of fame.