The good and the bad....

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by toughlovin, Oct 22, 2015.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Hi all,

    Well yesterday I went back into crisis mode as my son was kicked out of the sober house he was in. It was nutty because I am across the country and I had the manager call me, and keep yelling at my son while I was trying to talk to him.... and I was in the middle of something else of course!!

    So the bad news is he was kicked out.

    The good news it was not because he was using!!! I am not completely sure why as of course I am getting different info from my son and from the owner and the truth is probably somewhere imbetween.

    The good news is I think my son has stayed sober and has not relapsed.

    The bad news is he still has a lot of life lessons to learn about getting along and not being so confrontational etc etc.

    The good news is he called his sponsor who came out and helped him figure out what to do.

    The good news is he talked to me and lucky for him he has a safety net which is us.

    The good news is he did manage to go get his stuff and find another sober living place which he says is a lot better.

    So there is good news in here.... but man oh man this type of stuff wears on me... and of course it is yet another expense.

    BUT and this is the huge thing he still seems serious about recovery. He felt the owner and manager were using and that bothered him... and this new place he said the staff is all working recovery.
     
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  2. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    Glad it worked out and that it wasn't his fault. He's being very responsible!
     
  3. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Oh I think he is at least partially at fault....but at least he wasn't using!
     
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  4. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    :twister2: It sure can be dizzying with our special ones. So glad your son is doing well and being responsible. Good signs!

    :choir:

    Hallelujah!
     
  5. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Ummm... I think MOST people, in most confrontational situations, are at least partially at fault. In other words, pretty normal for a confrontational situation. That he has reached out for appropriate help and support, and made use of that help and support... is a HUGE positive.
     
  6. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    True! Although he has a strong sense of fairness and also be pretty stubborn and be confrontational when it would be much better to back off....the qualities that made him a difficult child to begin with are still there....but he does seem to be learning about himself and I think now that he is not using is gaining insight into himself....so he is making progress....and I am too. Supporting him but also letting him figure it out!
     
  7. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I am sorry, I am laughing here because I am learning the same thing about my daughter. She has been clean over a year now but still has some of the qualities that are not so nice. She is generally bossy and has a hard time controlling her mouth - though she is MUCH better than she used to be, she still has to really work at it. Her job told her that she does such a great job and she would be promoted in a heart beat except for the attitude and mouth she gets sometimes...

    I think it is awesome that he figured it out and is not giving up!! :)
     
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