The J drama

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Abbey, Aug 28, 2007.

  1. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Well, J and girlfriend (40ish) were supposed to come this last weekend for a short visit. We got them a hotel room not far from the house and paid for their rental car for 2 days.

    Saturday rolls around and no J. Saturday night comes around and we get a frantic phone call from him that his girlfriend has overdosed on heroine. She is on life support.

    J claims he has not been doing any of those drugs, but I am skeptical. Heroine is pretty severe. It's usually a lifestyle, and not one that you lead solo when you have a partner.

    I guess time will tell.

  2. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    so now J will see how it is to worry about a loved one who drugs.

    I thought J was headed back to jail himself???
  3. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Oh Lordy.

    Hugs, Abbey-

  4. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    I'm sorry.
  5. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    No, he's been out for a couple of months, which to his credit is the longest he's EVER been out. But, part of his parole conditions are that he not associate with people who do drugs (alcohol included), nor partake in them himself. That is a pretty hard thing to do when you have been so deep in that culture for so many years.

    I guess time will tell.

  6. envisablepuppet

    envisablepuppet New Member

    I'm so sorry to hear this Abbey. You are right tho, if she is using the chances of him not using to are slim to none. I was really hoping he was on the right track this time. Hope his girlfriend will be ok. How sad for both of them :frown:

  7. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    I am so sorry. You are right, you do not hang out, let alone date someone who does heroin, unless you, yourself are a user. Heroin is the be all, end all drug.......and once hooked, it is pretty impossible to get off. Prison will be perhaps his only way.

    It is all so thoughts will be with you.
  8. WhymeMom?

    WhymeMom? No real answers to life..

    Sorry to hear of overdose near him....hope his awakening comes soon....
  9. PonyGirl

    PonyGirl Warrior Parent

    That's really a horrible story! I do hope the woman pulls thru. For some reason, I've always found heroin particularly frightening.

    Any new word from J at all since the initial call?

    Really sad news, sorry to hear it.

    How awful of a person am I, if I observe that perhaps the girlfriend really didn't want to come visit??

    I know, I'm rotten. :faint:

  10. SunnyFlorida

    SunnyFlorida Active Member

    Well....on one hand J called...that's progress :whew:. I guess the girlfriend was a little nervous about meeting you all and she sort of uh.........slipped up?

    I don't wish anyone to be on life support so please accept my hope that J's girlfriend pulls through.
  11. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat


    I hope that the girl pulls through, too.

    And gets the ever lovin' crap scared out of her. This could be her wake up call.

    I don't know who J is, I am assuming he is your son. He will be in my prayers.
  12. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Yes, J is our son. I haven't heard from him since the incident, so I don't know how his girlfriend is doing. He doesn't have a phone, and only calls when he can scrape together 30 cents to make a call home.

    My biggest concern was heroin was his drug of choice for many years. I find it hard to believe that he lives with someone who does it and he does not, but I guess it could happen. Who knows. She is also roughly my age - mid 40's - so it's not like some teen experimenting.

  13. scent of cedar

    scent of cedar New Member

    Ouch, Abbey.

    I'm so sorry this is happening again.

  14. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Yuck! Does not sound hopeful that he is off drugs.

    I hope you had not let your guard down. Does not sound like that will be coming anytime soon.
  15. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    ant doesnt do drugs but does hang with those who do. he drinks, he switched to alcohol as his drug of choice, so it is not unheard of to be with users who are doing drugs while you are drinking.
  16. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I hope the girlfriend is okay. I'm with you, though. If it's his drug of choice, even if he was trying to stay clean, I'd think the tempation would be enormous.

    Maybe this will give him a teeny peek at what you've been feeling.

  17. KFld

    KFld New Member

    I can tell you right now, my son is a recovering heroin addict and he would be the first one to tell me that he could never be around anyone who does it and not do it himself. It is the hardest drug to stop and unless your son was on methadone or suboxone, I find it would be highly impossible for him to not be using with her. I've unfortunlaty learned to much through my sons experience. Like you said, time will tell. There isn't much else you can do about it anyway but hope and pray.
  18. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    He is on daily methadone treatments. I found this odd as he just spent 2 years in prison, supposedly drug free. One would think you would have dried out by that time. Maybe it is a preventative thing.

    *If* he is really trying to get on the right track, I think he's playing with wolves by being involved with someone who is actively using. He doesn't even have to touch the stuff to have his parole revoked. Association is enough.

  19. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    How is the girl doing? Is she gonna be OK? I hope?
  20. KFld

    KFld New Member

    I know they say this addiction stays with you forever, worse then any other. It may be that he didn't trust himself once out of prison to not go back and went on it for preventative measures, or relapsed, who knows???? Just the fact that he is involved with anyone who is still using tells me he is not in full recovery. I think that is impossible in his situation.