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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 208472" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Oh, yes... I remember those days, when the menfolk I worked with kept trying to either get a rise out of me or were incredibly patronising, or simply very unpleasant in chauvinistic ways. I'd go to the workshop after various bits of equipment and they'd always try to make some sort of sexual innuendo out of it. I had a few stock comments up my sleeve and kept trying to ring the changes so they would seem off-the-cuff. My favourite was reserved for when they were making comments about the sizes of their appendages or capabilities; I would say, "That reminds me - I have to buy some toothpicks on the way home." Or, if they were really obvious, "Put it away, little boy, it's too young to be out, it will catch cold."</p><p></p><p>I've found that when you have a group of men together and one woman as the source of their entertainment, they will egg one another on, one will step further forward almost as the spokesperson (or the person who drew the short straw) and will be the one to speak. The aim - to make the solitary female the focus of the humour. Many women will crumble in this situation, or will get loudly indignant. This only adds to the amusement of the men and reinforces the view that women have no sense of humour. It also increases the chance of more scenes like this. it is harassment, pure and simple, but complaining doesn't stop it. Getting the men at their own game, will. </p><p></p><p>The weak link to this scenario - it will backfire on the bloke if the woman can maintain her dignity and even come back with a gentle (or biting) riposte, with a smile. You keep the smile so if the bloke complains you can use his line, "What's the matter? NO sense of humour?" And you do it in front of the other men not only so they can be witnesses to their brother's humiliation, but to also warn them to not try this themselves or they will be on the receiving end. To lose face in front of other men, when you were expecting to elevate your status - it's a harsh lesson they don't forget in a hurry. But if you keep a smile on your face you're making it clear that YOU hold the upper hand.</p><p></p><p>I found that it didn't take too long before not only did they stop trying this sort of thing on with me, but I found myself accepted as one of the men, they stopped being silly and I was able to get on with my job unmolested and unobtrusively.</p><p></p><p>I have a number of anecdotes but I can't share them because the site censor would have a field day!</p><p></p><p>Star, you're a legend! You handled it just right. I saw a lot of women try to handle this sort of thing with legal affront but they ended up having to leave because the workplace became increasingly intolerable for them. I tried it too for a while - but the more indignant I got, the worse the response from the men until they were extremely hostile. So I switched tack and used humour, generally the same sort of humour, back at them. When they stuck pictures of naked women up on the walls I found pictures of naked men and stuck those up. I made sure that any 'naughty bits' were completely fig-leaved or airbrushed out, so they actually looked emasculated. </p><p></p><p>Working with men in a male-dominated workplace isn't easy. But it can be done, with success.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 208472, member: 1991"] Oh, yes... I remember those days, when the menfolk I worked with kept trying to either get a rise out of me or were incredibly patronising, or simply very unpleasant in chauvinistic ways. I'd go to the workshop after various bits of equipment and they'd always try to make some sort of sexual innuendo out of it. I had a few stock comments up my sleeve and kept trying to ring the changes so they would seem off-the-cuff. My favourite was reserved for when they were making comments about the sizes of their appendages or capabilities; I would say, "That reminds me - I have to buy some toothpicks on the way home." Or, if they were really obvious, "Put it away, little boy, it's too young to be out, it will catch cold." I've found that when you have a group of men together and one woman as the source of their entertainment, they will egg one another on, one will step further forward almost as the spokesperson (or the person who drew the short straw) and will be the one to speak. The aim - to make the solitary female the focus of the humour. Many women will crumble in this situation, or will get loudly indignant. This only adds to the amusement of the men and reinforces the view that women have no sense of humour. It also increases the chance of more scenes like this. it is harassment, pure and simple, but complaining doesn't stop it. Getting the men at their own game, will. The weak link to this scenario - it will backfire on the bloke if the woman can maintain her dignity and even come back with a gentle (or biting) riposte, with a smile. You keep the smile so if the bloke complains you can use his line, "What's the matter? NO sense of humour?" And you do it in front of the other men not only so they can be witnesses to their brother's humiliation, but to also warn them to not try this themselves or they will be on the receiving end. To lose face in front of other men, when you were expecting to elevate your status - it's a harsh lesson they don't forget in a hurry. But if you keep a smile on your face you're making it clear that YOU hold the upper hand. I found that it didn't take too long before not only did they stop trying this sort of thing on with me, but I found myself accepted as one of the men, they stopped being silly and I was able to get on with my job unmolested and unobtrusively. I have a number of anecdotes but I can't share them because the site censor would have a field day! Star, you're a legend! You handled it just right. I saw a lot of women try to handle this sort of thing with legal affront but they ended up having to leave because the workplace became increasingly intolerable for them. I tried it too for a while - but the more indignant I got, the worse the response from the men until they were extremely hostile. So I switched tack and used humour, generally the same sort of humour, back at them. When they stuck pictures of naked women up on the walls I found pictures of naked men and stuck those up. I made sure that any 'naughty bits' were completely fig-leaved or airbrushed out, so they actually looked emasculated. Working with men in a male-dominated workplace isn't easy. But it can be done, with success. Marg [/QUOTE]
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