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General Parenting
The one where a family member crosses the line with "opinions" about your difficult child...
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<blockquote data-quote="BeachPeace" data-source="post: 542986"><p>I think I may be permanently estranged from some family members. I have sometimes told myself that I will protect my child from negativity and pessisimstic family members but recently that was put to test. </p><p>Blue had a severe meltdown that involved aggression and violence. During the episode he broke a ceramic pitcher full of water on the tile floor. I could not safely restrain him so after 45 minutes and multiple broken things (lamps, plates, etc) I called 911 to send EMS to assist me with giving him his emergency dose of prn Risperdal. While I was on the phone with 911 dispatcher - he took off running down the hall, slipped and landed on his arm. This was the first time I called EMS. They arrived with the police and fire department - my house looked like a crime scene - and my son was sitting on the floor like a scared puppy, nonverbal, holding his arm. They were so kind to me. He took his medication - but was already calmed down due to his arm pain I think. Anyway - Blue fractured his elbow during this incident and was put into a cast. </p><p>Next day - my nerves are still frazzled and I am emotionally drained. I receive a call from a "well-meaning" family member who proceeds to tell me that my child will end up a serial killer and will "kill an innocent child in the neighorhood" and we will "get sued and lose everything" I stood there in shock and stayed on the line just long enough to hear that I "do not have control of the situation" and he was afraid for the children in the extended family to ever visit our home. </p><p>I was shaken and horrified that someone in our family had the nerve to call me up and "warn me" about my son apparently becoming a homicidal maniac. He is 9. </p><p>I am now not speaking to the family member and others in my family are telling me to "try to understand" the intentions. </p><p>Every day of my life is a struggle. Every day of my son's life is a struggle. I am very well aware of the statistics on mental illness, adoption, behavior disorders, etc. I just CHOOSE to take one day at a time, find the best help, therapy, and medications I can,and HOPE for the best. </p><p>Just because he kicked the dog once or has dissociative episodes does NOT mean it is ok for others to dismiss him as a lost cause. </p><p>He still is a kid and needs to play with his cousins, receive love from his family, and be treated like he is a person with a future just like anyone else. </p><p>Am I so wrong for expecting what any other parent would? Why does it become OK for others to feel it is acceptable to wrap his future up with a rope? If my child had a physical disability instead of a mental one - people would be horrified to say "well give up hope, he will never walk or talk, etc"</p><p>How can I move past this as these elderly family members are not teachable..... </p><p>I am still shaken by the lack of compassion and empathy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BeachPeace, post: 542986"] I think I may be permanently estranged from some family members. I have sometimes told myself that I will protect my child from negativity and pessisimstic family members but recently that was put to test. Blue had a severe meltdown that involved aggression and violence. During the episode he broke a ceramic pitcher full of water on the tile floor. I could not safely restrain him so after 45 minutes and multiple broken things (lamps, plates, etc) I called 911 to send EMS to assist me with giving him his emergency dose of prn Risperdal. While I was on the phone with 911 dispatcher - he took off running down the hall, slipped and landed on his arm. This was the first time I called EMS. They arrived with the police and fire department - my house looked like a crime scene - and my son was sitting on the floor like a scared puppy, nonverbal, holding his arm. They were so kind to me. He took his medication - but was already calmed down due to his arm pain I think. Anyway - Blue fractured his elbow during this incident and was put into a cast. Next day - my nerves are still frazzled and I am emotionally drained. I receive a call from a "well-meaning" family member who proceeds to tell me that my child will end up a serial killer and will "kill an innocent child in the neighorhood" and we will "get sued and lose everything" I stood there in shock and stayed on the line just long enough to hear that I "do not have control of the situation" and he was afraid for the children in the extended family to ever visit our home. I was shaken and horrified that someone in our family had the nerve to call me up and "warn me" about my son apparently becoming a homicidal maniac. He is 9. I am now not speaking to the family member and others in my family are telling me to "try to understand" the intentions. Every day of my life is a struggle. Every day of my son's life is a struggle. I am very well aware of the statistics on mental illness, adoption, behavior disorders, etc. I just CHOOSE to take one day at a time, find the best help, therapy, and medications I can,and HOPE for the best. Just because he kicked the dog once or has dissociative episodes does NOT mean it is ok for others to dismiss him as a lost cause. He still is a kid and needs to play with his cousins, receive love from his family, and be treated like he is a person with a future just like anyone else. Am I so wrong for expecting what any other parent would? Why does it become OK for others to feel it is acceptable to wrap his future up with a rope? If my child had a physical disability instead of a mental one - people would be horrified to say "well give up hope, he will never walk or talk, etc" How can I move past this as these elderly family members are not teachable..... I am still shaken by the lack of compassion and empathy. [/QUOTE]
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The one where a family member crosses the line with "opinions" about your difficult child...
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