The saga continues

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by 2tired, Aug 28, 2008.

  1. 2tired

    2tired New Member

    After getting home from work yesterday, one of my daughter's ex-bestfriend and her mother showed up at my house looking for my difficult child. She asked if my daughter still lived here. Instead of giving any information, I asked her why. She told me that my daughter- and whoever she is with- have been sending threatening myspace msgs, to her ex friend. Told her that they were coming to her house to kick her xxx - and that her mother better start shopping for a casket. So to add to all of the other stuff - making threats against someone, which isn't that normally taken seriously? So, the mother said she was going to press charges against my daughter. I'm just in such shock - I wonder what is next. She can't keep going at this rate- something not good is bound to happen.
     
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    My friend's daughter sent a threatening letter to somebody (and my friend's kid is a easy child--it's not unusual). She wrote something like "I'm going to kick your ###." The police came. Her mother had printed off the threat.
    My friend took away all her computer privledges for a long period of time. I"m so sorry this happened.
     
  3. 2tired

    2tired New Member

    I think this beyond taking a computer away. This girl is terrified, and her mother is going to press charges. My daugther ran away almost 3 weeks ago - and I have not heard from her. On top of that she has criminal tresspass, and theft by taking pending as well, truancy, because she hasn't gone to school of course since she ran away.
     
  4. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Tired! Well, it looks like she's going to be getting the help that she needed-whether she likes it or not!

    Just be honest with the police when they show up, show them the missing persons report and tell them to arrest her when they find her. If she shows up at your place, welcome her with open arms, go into the kitchen, bake some welcome home brownies, oh and while your at it, quietly call the cops and let them know that your daughter with countless arrest warrants is quietly sitting in your living room.

    She's put you through hell, as well as your son - let her understand that actions earn consequenses!

    Good luck! I'm rooting for you!

    Beth
     
  5. Christy

    Christy New Member

    I hope that she is soon found and gets the help she need. I'm sorry you are facing this.

    Any chance the police can tell where the emails/posts are originating from?

    Hugs,
    Christy
     
  6. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Nvts is right, she is going to get the help she needs now. Believe it or not this is not a bad thing. If she gets remanded by the court then they will force her to get the help she needs. Ending up in a court room was the best thing that ever happened for me and my difficult child as she was court ordered to a placement and now we have mandatory after care services. Before the court order she just refused to participate in any treatment.

    I hope she is found soon and she is okay.

    {{{HUGS}}}
     
  7. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    at least it sound slike she's ok, if she is messaging on myspace, they can find her that way very easily, it's the 1st thing the detective looked at the one time difficult child I went missing and I went through the whole missing persons report ordeal.

    praying she'll be found soon
     
  8. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    They should be able to trace where the messages are coming from. Hopefully she'll be found and then be able to get the help she needs. Hugs to you.
     
  9. 2tired

    2tired New Member

    It has been a couple of interesting days. On one hand, I have no strengh to do anything. I have (had) an organization helping me - who contacted my difficult child' probation. Short story - the probation officer called me- went over all the charges- and said that if she is picked up they will put a hold on her and keep her until her court date. For the last (nearly over a week), I found out from Youth Matters, that my daughter had called, and the house where she was, the adult wanted to find out what she needs to do to foster my daughter. She never calld me. However, she was told that she was aiding and abedding a runaway - so somehow, my daughter is no longer there. She has called me Thursday and Fri. saying that she wants to come home. I asked her for what. = no good reply. I called juvenile intake to find out what I could do, if I let her here, would they pick her up - and told there was no hold placed on her. But, I am not going to let her come here without something in place - they were trying to get respite. But she must think that she can come home after 3 weeks, like she has been on vacation. If they would have picked her up, I would gladly call the police..... Trust me, I trying everything to keep her from coming back here -so calling police is my preference- but here they do so little. They are so pathetic.
     
  10. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Having had my child threatened numerous time via MySpace, I can testify to how frightening it is. I'm appalled at how vicious it can get. I've called the police too after printing it all out. I've gone to parents too when it was a neighbor. What cracked me up was that the girl tried to deny it. "my friend did it, not me" Mom was also quite shocked by her daughter's awful language and provocative pictures.

    Unfortunately, it is very common. Yes, PCs have also done it. To me, it is also evidence of impulsiveness and being an immature not-using-their-brain teenager. I mean, come on! Make such a threat and there it is documented, can't be denied, and can be printed and shown to parents and police.

    I hope difficult child is found so that she can get services. Even if it involves the courts the police. This must be a nightmare to live.
     
  11. 2tired

    2tired New Member

    I hope I don't sound terrible, but I'm tired and don't wanther back in my house. I have lived through all of this for the past 7 years. There are ups and downs, but I'm just tired. I couldn't believe that she called me and said she was ready to come home - I was caught off guard when she called, (unknown number). My first reaction was to ask her why.... I don't know about getting services, I just want this to be a peaceful house again. I picked up another day working, so that will get me out of the house a bit more.

    Also, those of you who advised me a few days back regarding the custody of my son to his dad, and me stating that I will not subject myself to the visitation..... Well, fortunately, or at least at this point, I received an order from the Supreme Court on the change of custody. The case has been dismissed by Superior Court because of the pending/ongoing case within Juvenile Court - who will have to decide. Honestly, I don't see any reason why I won't be given custody, I have worked the caseplan. But the way things have been going, I never expected any of this to happen or go this far. So for now - I go to court on the deprivation case on October 14th. So, no test. It is amazing how things work themselves out.

    In July, I had to answer the petition, and I went to a site to print the form, and indicated that I have a right to chastise my children, and that my wish was that the supreme court would allow juvenile court to continue.
    Thanks to all who tried to get me to see the light.....
     
  12. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    My, you've been through a lot lately!
    I am so sorry about your daughter. She is so young to be doing that. She has no clue how much help she needs, and how far-reaching her actions are, and how they affect others.
    I'm glad you were able to work things through with-custody with-your son, at least so far. I can only imagine how exhausted you must be.
    I'm sending strength ...
     
  13. 2tired

    2tired New Member

    It has been so much for so long. It's almost over though, I was hoping to get her to 18, and she had been doing so well, in school, home, church. She was highly regarded at church by everyone. She kept all the babies - helped me with cooking class - and cooking for church events etc. She was on her A game. But somewhere along the line something happened. I just hope that she gets some help before she turns 18, cause after that, it is over. It has truly been a nightmare. and it sure does help to have support out there and people who understand, have been through it, and who gives great advice. So it has been a great help being back in the spot that helps me get through the really tough times.
     
  14. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Ohhh, 2tired, she sounds like such a sweetie. She's got it in her. She's just got to find her way. Many, many hugs. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}
     
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