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The Stress Keeps Piling On
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 521162" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Hello Tired. Yikes, you have so much going on. I know how overwhelming that can be, I am sorry this is all on your plate all at once. As others have mentioned, you may be on this road for awhile, so I think you need to make sure you take VERY,VERY good care of yourself and your little Duckie. </p><p></p><p>Is seeing a therapist an option? That is always a huge help to me to vent to someone who is trained in giving you the best possible input and can really LISTEN to your woes. Being heard is essential now and you are surrounded by others in their own grief so you are essentially invisible. That is a very difficult place to be. There are also groups for folks dealing with grief. Hospice here in CA. offers groups for family members who are dealing with grief, and they are a big help because they know the stages of grief and how to help those dealing with that. For you <u>and</u> for your family too. I always look around for a support group, of which there are many here to choose from, for whatever issue I am dealing with. Sometimes hospitals offer groups too. If you can do it, try to find one so you get the support you need while this is going on around you. Having a forum where you can communicate your stress to others who can hear you and allow your feelings is, in my humble opinion, one of the most important things we can do for ourselves when life hits us between the eyes. Other options for keeping yourself well supported are acupuncture (a very good stress reliever, believe it or not!), massage, any nurturing kind of experience which will keep your stress down.</p><p></p><p>Tired, my heart goes out to you, this is a lot. Perhaps, if it feels right to you, a therapist may also be able to assist you in either ways to deal with your job better, or a plan to help you with an exit strategy and ways to implement creating a new job. I believe that when life as we know it begins to blow up, it can mean that we need to really look at what we are doing and begin the process of making changes, dissatisfaction is often a sign of changes needing to be made. Perhaps it's time to make a job change. Having someone to talk to about that and my life in general, has always been very helpful to me. </p><p></p><p>As someone else mentioned, and I myself have experienced, burnout is a very real thing. It does "suck the life out of you." Too much care-giving can not only burn you out emotionally, it has an enormous impact on your health, so it behooves you to take very good care of yourself. Take it from someone who had trouble learning that so my health took a nose dive and it took a long time to recover. My earnest and heartfelt advice to you is take excellent care of yourself, get support, do things you love, find ways to laugh and enjoy your life, exercise since that is a stress reliever, and as others have mentioned, do fun things with Duckie too so she can feel some relief from the tension surrounding the family. </p><p></p><p>Just as an aside, when my life has hit the fan in big ways, when the dust settled, often there were changes made, things got resolved, important conversations happened, new ideas surfaced, boundaries that were needed were revealed and then put into place, things happened that were tough, but ultimately, those things precipitated changes that were necessary. Try to hold on to that thought, another way to look at it is all of this is an <em>opportunity for growth</em>. Hugs and peaceful thoughts coming your way and my best wishes that you find ways to be soothed through this challenging time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 521162, member: 13542"] Hello Tired. Yikes, you have so much going on. I know how overwhelming that can be, I am sorry this is all on your plate all at once. As others have mentioned, you may be on this road for awhile, so I think you need to make sure you take VERY,VERY good care of yourself and your little Duckie. Is seeing a therapist an option? That is always a huge help to me to vent to someone who is trained in giving you the best possible input and can really LISTEN to your woes. Being heard is essential now and you are surrounded by others in their own grief so you are essentially invisible. That is a very difficult place to be. There are also groups for folks dealing with grief. Hospice here in CA. offers groups for family members who are dealing with grief, and they are a big help because they know the stages of grief and how to help those dealing with that. For you [U]and[/U] for your family too. I always look around for a support group, of which there are many here to choose from, for whatever issue I am dealing with. Sometimes hospitals offer groups too. If you can do it, try to find one so you get the support you need while this is going on around you. Having a forum where you can communicate your stress to others who can hear you and allow your feelings is, in my humble opinion, one of the most important things we can do for ourselves when life hits us between the eyes. Other options for keeping yourself well supported are acupuncture (a very good stress reliever, believe it or not!), massage, any nurturing kind of experience which will keep your stress down. Tired, my heart goes out to you, this is a lot. Perhaps, if it feels right to you, a therapist may also be able to assist you in either ways to deal with your job better, or a plan to help you with an exit strategy and ways to implement creating a new job. I believe that when life as we know it begins to blow up, it can mean that we need to really look at what we are doing and begin the process of making changes, dissatisfaction is often a sign of changes needing to be made. Perhaps it's time to make a job change. Having someone to talk to about that and my life in general, has always been very helpful to me. As someone else mentioned, and I myself have experienced, burnout is a very real thing. It does "suck the life out of you." Too much care-giving can not only burn you out emotionally, it has an enormous impact on your health, so it behooves you to take very good care of yourself. Take it from someone who had trouble learning that so my health took a nose dive and it took a long time to recover. My earnest and heartfelt advice to you is take excellent care of yourself, get support, do things you love, find ways to laugh and enjoy your life, exercise since that is a stress reliever, and as others have mentioned, do fun things with Duckie too so she can feel some relief from the tension surrounding the family. Just as an aside, when my life has hit the fan in big ways, when the dust settled, often there were changes made, things got resolved, important conversations happened, new ideas surfaced, boundaries that were needed were revealed and then put into place, things happened that were tough, but ultimately, those things precipitated changes that were necessary. Try to hold on to that thought, another way to look at it is all of this is an [I]opportunity for growth[/I]. Hugs and peaceful thoughts coming your way and my best wishes that you find ways to be soothed through this challenging time. [/QUOTE]
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