I put a key logger on difficult child's laptop right after Christmas. It gave me his Facebook (FB) password. Last night, I saw and read through several month's worth of messages. I know teenagers lie and am hoping some of this may be lies either from difficult child or the other kids...but I know there is a ton of truth here too. Here's a summary of the big stuff. 1. difficult child tried to join a frat in the fall. All of a sudden, they told him to leave. The story I now know is they think he date-raped a girl at one of their parties. He denies it. 2. On one day, a guy asked difficult child if he knows where he can get a good deal on a tv. difficult child says a friend stole some a couple of days ago. Then another person two days later accuses difficult child of stealing tvs from his house. 3. difficult child has been looking for alcohol off and on since after Christmas. 4. difficult child has been drinking off and on since returning to the dorms last week. However, he also claims the following which I know is a lie: 1. He has a three month old child. 2. He left high school while a senior to enter college and is now a year ahead. 3. He has competed world-wide in two extreme sports...including my personal favorite of all....he was in the 2009 Junior Olympics. I run between - he is an alcoholic...and addict....his disease is his business. I can do nothing. And....the alcoholism is a symptom of a deeper mental issue. His therapist first discussed this with me prior to the drinking becoming known. If he is bipolar, then he needs diagnosed and to comply with the medications. After that, if he chooses to drink, then I go back to point #1. Either way...I'm grieving. I'm scared. But, there's isn't anything I should do which I haven't already done. I read a lot in an Al-anon book last night and Codependent No More which helped. One thing said to think about how you are feeling and what you are thinking. You. Not them. So, that's how I choose to spend the rest of my day. I'm hoping and praying for all of you.