Lothlorien
Active Member
DDD, I am a DDD and there is only ONE bra that fits and I have about ten of them. If I go up in size, I don't know what I'll do. It's very hard to find DDD bras and even harder to find ones that actually fit properly.
The Witzend bra story, or "the middle age spread"...
- Thread starter witzend
- Start date
8 out of 10 women wear the wrong bra size. I learned that when I watched Oprah one day. I have always had a very small frame with a large bust and thought I was wearing the right bra size even though the cups never fit right. Well, I was lucky enough to live fairly close to a store that Oprah talked about called Intimacy (mods - that's the name of the store) and went with a friend to get a bra fitting. There are six of those stores around the country. You can google it to see if there is one near you.
The fitter didn't even measure me. She asked me what size I was wearing and took a 30 second glance at me with my top off and off she went to find some bras for me. She came back with 6 bras that all fit perfectly!! I couldn't believe it. It turned out that I was wearing too large a band and too small a cup. I went from a 36C to a 32E (which is the European equivalent of daughter). The fitter told me that the band should be very tight because it was what gave the support . . . not the straps. She said most American women don't wear the bands tight enough. The band was also lower on my back than I was used to but it does prevent rolls around the band that way.
The bras were very expensive but now that I know the brands and sizes that fit I buy them from online stores when they are on sale. I took both easy child and difficult child back with me and they were also wearing the wrong size bra. difficult child was thrilled to go from a 36A to a 34B. easy child has a very large bust and we were finally able to find a really supportive sports bra for her.
I have also been fitted at Nordstroms but didn't like the selection of bras as much. It's true that wearing the right size bra can change your entire silhouette and do wonders for your self-esteem.
~Kathy
The fitter didn't even measure me. She asked me what size I was wearing and took a 30 second glance at me with my top off and off she went to find some bras for me. She came back with 6 bras that all fit perfectly!! I couldn't believe it. It turned out that I was wearing too large a band and too small a cup. I went from a 36C to a 32E (which is the European equivalent of daughter). The fitter told me that the band should be very tight because it was what gave the support . . . not the straps. She said most American women don't wear the bands tight enough. The band was also lower on my back than I was used to but it does prevent rolls around the band that way.
The bras were very expensive but now that I know the brands and sizes that fit I buy them from online stores when they are on sale. I took both easy child and difficult child back with me and they were also wearing the wrong size bra. difficult child was thrilled to go from a 36A to a 34B. easy child has a very large bust and we were finally able to find a really supportive sports bra for her.
I have also been fitted at Nordstroms but didn't like the selection of bras as much. It's true that wearing the right size bra can change your entire silhouette and do wonders for your self-esteem.
~Kathy
Marguerite
Active Member
This is a useful thread. It really does make a difference to wear the right bra size.
Witz, we don't have Nordstrum's here, but we have other stores that would serve the same purpose. We also have stores with a "price matching" policy for almost everything, so the more exclusive stores can still be just the same price for the same product. The expense comes when the exclusive stores stock the expensive brands!
Your thread sent me out bra shopping yesterday afternoon. I went straight to the store my mother used to go to for fittings when I was a kid - David Jones. They have fitting staff there, also fitting staff who are supposed to be good with post-cancer patients, although you're supposed to make an appointment for those and I just walked in. Plus I arrived half an hour before closing, can't expect too much. Still, the first thing they did was hand me some half-cup bras ("Elle McPherson" brand - can be pricey) which to my eye didn't look likely. I soon found one older lady there to run errands for me, fetching bras, checking the fit and getting more. I was out of there in fifteen minutes with one bra which fitted, looked good and was comfortable. But it's a C cup! My fitter also remarked on the idiocy of this - I was trying on sizes that ranged from 34DD to 36C (the one I bought). Crazy. No way should this be a C cup - and that's something to watch out for, the non-standard sizes. So if you're "between sizes" with one brand (or several) then change brands, maybe go for something imported and designer-ish (or if you've previously worn designer bras, go for the local generics) and you could find a size that fits you.
Someone mentioned the boob description of "fried eggs" - my sister used to refer to hers as "light switches". And I remember an old Phyllis Diller line, she said her bra came back from the laundry labelled "flat press".
David Jones does have a few stores in competition with it, even in our mall. I could have gone to another department store (Myer) or I could have gone to a bra specialty shop - we have a chain of those, a branch in our mall, plus a budget bra shop which frankly I tend to avoid, the bras there fall apart too fast.
David Jones is sort of equivalent to Harrods, I guess. But if you avoid the expensive designer stuff (and even that isn't too bad - the Elle McPherson bras were the same price as the one I eventually bought, about A$50) then you can shop in luxury but pay basement prices.
I remember Macy's from when I was a kid, but I'm not sure if it's the same Macy's. We also have Target and other similar budget stores which would not have a fitter, ever. You take a friend, or prepare to have to get fully dressed each time you go out to get more supplies of bras to try on. They tend to not have the more designer labels, I prefer to go where I have a wide range to check out, just in case. Especially at the moment, when my body is still working out what size I am going to end up. I got a shock looking at my bobs in the mirror yesterday - they are now different cup sizes, and my poor right boob with its crater is a lot saggier. But the fitter took one look and said, "Here is a bra that has a bit of padding just there, right where your boob needs it." I had to try three different ones in that range, but that's the one I got. With the bra on, it all looks normal. Plus when I roll onto my side, I don't have the right boob falling out of the bra any more.
I'm very much in favour of stores with fitters.
Oh, and one more thing - I know you guys have to tip people in the US, I don't know if you would be expected to tip your bra fitter - but not here! The store has it there as a free service. Here in Australia, the fitters would be offended if you tried to tip them.
Marg
Witz, we don't have Nordstrum's here, but we have other stores that would serve the same purpose. We also have stores with a "price matching" policy for almost everything, so the more exclusive stores can still be just the same price for the same product. The expense comes when the exclusive stores stock the expensive brands!
Your thread sent me out bra shopping yesterday afternoon. I went straight to the store my mother used to go to for fittings when I was a kid - David Jones. They have fitting staff there, also fitting staff who are supposed to be good with post-cancer patients, although you're supposed to make an appointment for those and I just walked in. Plus I arrived half an hour before closing, can't expect too much. Still, the first thing they did was hand me some half-cup bras ("Elle McPherson" brand - can be pricey) which to my eye didn't look likely. I soon found one older lady there to run errands for me, fetching bras, checking the fit and getting more. I was out of there in fifteen minutes with one bra which fitted, looked good and was comfortable. But it's a C cup! My fitter also remarked on the idiocy of this - I was trying on sizes that ranged from 34DD to 36C (the one I bought). Crazy. No way should this be a C cup - and that's something to watch out for, the non-standard sizes. So if you're "between sizes" with one brand (or several) then change brands, maybe go for something imported and designer-ish (or if you've previously worn designer bras, go for the local generics) and you could find a size that fits you.
Someone mentioned the boob description of "fried eggs" - my sister used to refer to hers as "light switches". And I remember an old Phyllis Diller line, she said her bra came back from the laundry labelled "flat press".
David Jones does have a few stores in competition with it, even in our mall. I could have gone to another department store (Myer) or I could have gone to a bra specialty shop - we have a chain of those, a branch in our mall, plus a budget bra shop which frankly I tend to avoid, the bras there fall apart too fast.
David Jones is sort of equivalent to Harrods, I guess. But if you avoid the expensive designer stuff (and even that isn't too bad - the Elle McPherson bras were the same price as the one I eventually bought, about A$50) then you can shop in luxury but pay basement prices.
I remember Macy's from when I was a kid, but I'm not sure if it's the same Macy's. We also have Target and other similar budget stores which would not have a fitter, ever. You take a friend, or prepare to have to get fully dressed each time you go out to get more supplies of bras to try on. They tend to not have the more designer labels, I prefer to go where I have a wide range to check out, just in case. Especially at the moment, when my body is still working out what size I am going to end up. I got a shock looking at my bobs in the mirror yesterday - they are now different cup sizes, and my poor right boob with its crater is a lot saggier. But the fitter took one look and said, "Here is a bra that has a bit of padding just there, right where your boob needs it." I had to try three different ones in that range, but that's the one I got. With the bra on, it all looks normal. Plus when I roll onto my side, I don't have the right boob falling out of the bra any more.
I'm very much in favour of stores with fitters.
Oh, and one more thing - I know you guys have to tip people in the US, I don't know if you would be expected to tip your bra fitter - but not here! The store has it there as a free service. Here in Australia, the fitters would be offended if you tried to tip them.
Marg
muttmeister
Well-Known Member
Congratulations on the D cup, if that's what you want. I was a DDD for years. Instead of trying to get a bra that fit, I had breast reduction surgery and got the boobs to fit the bra instead of the bra to fit the boobs.
Now I'm a C cup and ecstatic with that. And while they did the surgery they also did a lift so I can go braless at age 62 and look better than I did at 16.
I don't think I'd ever let a plastic surgeon fool with my face (a few wrinkles add character, right?) but the surgery I had was the best thing I ever did. Now I can buy cheap bras at WalMart and they fit. For the first time in my life I have them in every color.
Now I'm a C cup and ecstatic with that. And while they did the surgery they also did a lift so I can go braless at age 62 and look better than I did at 16.I don't think I'd ever let a plastic surgeon fool with my face (a few wrinkles add character, right?) but the surgery I had was the best thing I ever did. Now I can buy cheap bras at WalMart and they fit. For the first time in my life I have them in every color.
witzend
Well-Known Member
I'm glad that you went out and found something that made you feel good Marg. I know that sizes can vary drastically from brand to brand and bra to bra. For me, if nothing else, I know what a bra that fits should look and feel like. We don't tend to tip the department store staff here. I suppose you might for a personal shopper or something, but that's way out of my price range! They get a bit of a commission, I think, because if they find a good client, they are totally your gal at the store. They'll call you when they have something you want, they'll have things altered, etc.
Mutt, I wish I had a lift! I've lost most of the muscle tissue around the shoulders, so I am quite bony from the armpits up. There is a bit of a sag issue, to say the least!
Mutt, I wish I had a lift! I've lost most of the muscle tissue around the shoulders, so I am quite bony from the armpits up. There is a bit of a sag issue, to say the least!
Marguerite
Active Member
Our shop staff aren't on commission, they are on either casual rates (per hour) or they are on salary.
I'm going to make quiet enquiries about getting things lifted, I've been told that under some circumstances there is cover for it, post-cancer. It may not apply to me, though. The rules keep changing, mainly to save the health insurance people money.
Witz, I can relate to the saggy skin - I look like I've got batwings, a bra tight enough around also means there's a lot of loose flesh overhanging. But it won't be the same as yours - your FSH Muscular Dystrophy would be a big factor. Our young friend with the same thing is very self-conscious about the lack of flesh in her upper arms and shoulders, she's always covering up. She's gone into fashion design and I think a lot of the motivation was so she could design clothes she was happy to wear.
Marg
I'm going to make quiet enquiries about getting things lifted, I've been told that under some circumstances there is cover for it, post-cancer. It may not apply to me, though. The rules keep changing, mainly to save the health insurance people money.
Witz, I can relate to the saggy skin - I look like I've got batwings, a bra tight enough around also means there's a lot of loose flesh overhanging. But it won't be the same as yours - your FSH Muscular Dystrophy would be a big factor. Our young friend with the same thing is very self-conscious about the lack of flesh in her upper arms and shoulders, she's always covering up. She's gone into fashion design and I think a lot of the motivation was so she could design clothes she was happy to wear.
Marg
Marguerite
Active Member
I'll let her know, Witz.
I got onto the Breast Care nurse today. Actually, I got two of them, because when the one in my district didn't call me back, I rang another district. I had what I thought was a fairly simple question - is reconstructive surgery covered under Medicare?
They finally called me back, both of them, at 6 pm (just as the thunderstorm broke overhead!). Thank goodness for cordless phones during a storm...
The information was useful, especially when the Breast Care nurse form my own district called me back. They have my files on computer there, so her information could be more specific.
I feel a bit of a wimp asking about breast reconstruction, when all I had was a lumpectomy. The info on line only seems to talk about reconstruction following mastectomy. But it's five weeks post surgery now, and I'm realising more each day, how much they took. Of course it was necessary, but now I have to find ways to manage what I have left. Bouncing info off the Breast Care nurse was useful. The upshot of it all - immediately after surgery, there was a lot of bruising and swelling, probably at least partly due to the surgeon having to go back in to take some more. I reckon I was at least two cup sizes larger on the right side. Then as the post-op infection subsided, tat swelling went down. The bruising took another few weeks to heal, it's all gone now. There is still a sore, hard lump at the wound site in the breast (top of the breast, about an inch above the nipple) and that lump seems to pull on the scar so there is an obvious 'dish' there, almost like a golf ball divot. It pulls more on one side, which also makes me think it will pass with time. The Breast Care nurse confirmed that this is likely.
Now, my right breast now seems to be at least one cup size, possible heading for two, smaller than the left. I really saw it yesterday in the full-length mirror at the bra shop (OK, full-length - the mirror helped me see in perspective, it doesn't mean my boobs now sag down to my ankles!)
So smaller as it is now, when the scar finishes healing it will be smaller still.
And also, radiotherapy will cause some swelling but after it all settles, the irradiated breast will likely shrink a little more. So I have to wait for the scar to soften up; then wait until after the radiotherapy, then wait until the swelling from radiotherapy settles down.
Doctors don't recommend breast implants or any other reconstructive work before radiotherapy, because it can harden implants; it causes breast tissue to eventually shrink; there are still too many changes.
So the suggestion now is - when I turn up for my first radiotherapy session, I get the receptionist to give the Breast Care nurse a call and she will come round with some breast forms for me. Once the scar softens, I should be able to put a small breast form in and lift the whole breast enough so it won't fall out of the bra cup so readily. At the moment it won't work because of the hard lump attached to the scar, and it's on top of my breast. if it was underneath already, it would work.
Also the Breast Care nurse confirmed - the fitting I had yesterday DID take into account my recent surgery. It turns out that the bra I bought was one of the options that are suggested to women in my situation. However, there is another type of bra she said I should ask about, it could be even better for me at the moment.
Oh, and the final bit of information - breast reconstruction IS covered by our national health insurance. But there will be a long waiting time (maybe several years) if I choose a public hospital. It's all those inconsiderate people needing cardiac bypass who keep bumping non-essential surgery down the lists!
So there you go - bra shopping can get a little more complicated, but there is so much help available, it is wonderful.
Marg
I got onto the Breast Care nurse today. Actually, I got two of them, because when the one in my district didn't call me back, I rang another district. I had what I thought was a fairly simple question - is reconstructive surgery covered under Medicare?
They finally called me back, both of them, at 6 pm (just as the thunderstorm broke overhead!). Thank goodness for cordless phones during a storm...
The information was useful, especially when the Breast Care nurse form my own district called me back. They have my files on computer there, so her information could be more specific.
I feel a bit of a wimp asking about breast reconstruction, when all I had was a lumpectomy. The info on line only seems to talk about reconstruction following mastectomy. But it's five weeks post surgery now, and I'm realising more each day, how much they took. Of course it was necessary, but now I have to find ways to manage what I have left. Bouncing info off the Breast Care nurse was useful. The upshot of it all - immediately after surgery, there was a lot of bruising and swelling, probably at least partly due to the surgeon having to go back in to take some more. I reckon I was at least two cup sizes larger on the right side. Then as the post-op infection subsided, tat swelling went down. The bruising took another few weeks to heal, it's all gone now. There is still a sore, hard lump at the wound site in the breast (top of the breast, about an inch above the nipple) and that lump seems to pull on the scar so there is an obvious 'dish' there, almost like a golf ball divot. It pulls more on one side, which also makes me think it will pass with time. The Breast Care nurse confirmed that this is likely.
Now, my right breast now seems to be at least one cup size, possible heading for two, smaller than the left. I really saw it yesterday in the full-length mirror at the bra shop (OK, full-length - the mirror helped me see in perspective, it doesn't mean my boobs now sag down to my ankles!)
So smaller as it is now, when the scar finishes healing it will be smaller still.
And also, radiotherapy will cause some swelling but after it all settles, the irradiated breast will likely shrink a little more. So I have to wait for the scar to soften up; then wait until after the radiotherapy, then wait until the swelling from radiotherapy settles down.
Doctors don't recommend breast implants or any other reconstructive work before radiotherapy, because it can harden implants; it causes breast tissue to eventually shrink; there are still too many changes.
So the suggestion now is - when I turn up for my first radiotherapy session, I get the receptionist to give the Breast Care nurse a call and she will come round with some breast forms for me. Once the scar softens, I should be able to put a small breast form in and lift the whole breast enough so it won't fall out of the bra cup so readily. At the moment it won't work because of the hard lump attached to the scar, and it's on top of my breast. if it was underneath already, it would work.
Also the Breast Care nurse confirmed - the fitting I had yesterday DID take into account my recent surgery. It turns out that the bra I bought was one of the options that are suggested to women in my situation. However, there is another type of bra she said I should ask about, it could be even better for me at the moment.
Oh, and the final bit of information - breast reconstruction IS covered by our national health insurance. But there will be a long waiting time (maybe several years) if I choose a public hospital. It's all those inconsiderate people needing cardiac bypass who keep bumping non-essential surgery down the lists!
So there you go - bra shopping can get a little more complicated, but there is so much help available, it is wonderful.
Marg
This thread sure has been informational!
It's funny--because I had intended to go shopping for some new lingerie soon anyway--but now I'm wondering whether I am wearing the correct size bra? I'll have to look into it...
Meanwhile, and I don't mean to be dumb, can anyone explain "shaking the breast into the bra"....? Does that mean you get dressed differently? (And what if you don't have a lot to "shake"...?)
Thanks!
It's funny--because I had intended to go shopping for some new lingerie soon anyway--but now I'm wondering whether I am wearing the correct size bra? I'll have to look into it...
Meanwhile, and I don't mean to be dumb, can anyone explain "shaking the breast into the bra"....? Does that mean you get dressed differently? (And what if you don't have a lot to "shake"...?)
Thanks!
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
Im seriously wondering if I am wearing the wrong sized bra. Ok, I know I have to be. We have had this discussion in the past. Where is Abbey?
There are a few of us who just tuck them in our pants or roll them up into our bras. Me being one of them.
Do all these fancy bras have wires? I cannot stand wires.
There are a few of us who just tuck them in our pants or roll them up into our bras. Me being one of them.
Do all these fancy bras have wires? I cannot stand wires.
DDD
Well-Known Member
"Shaking" means that you bend over at the waist so your breasts are fully downward going into the cup. Most women just stand upright and attach the bra which means that there is no support for the full breast in the cup. Even if you are small that allows the cup to be chosen using the full circumfrance of your breast at the chest wall. DDD
trinityroyal
Well-Known Member
Witz, you've inspired me to go and get a bra fitting.
The last time I had one, I was 10 years old. The bra-fitting lady squinted at me for a bit, and then reached out and felt me up. She got the size spot on (34 C at the time), but I was so mortified by the experience that I've never had another fitting.
Now that my weight has settled down after having the twins, and I can see the toll that gravity has taken on my once perky chest (sigh) it's time to take the plunge.
Trinity
The last time I had one, I was 10 years old. The bra-fitting lady squinted at me for a bit, and then reached out and felt me up. She got the size spot on (34 C at the time), but I was so mortified by the experience that I've never had another fitting.
Now that my weight has settled down after having the twins, and I can see the toll that gravity has taken on my once perky chest (sigh) it's time to take the plunge.
Trinity
GoingNorth
Crazy Cat Lady
The only bras I can tolerate are the racer back sports bras for medium support. I wear those with the back band looser than it should be, sort of stuff the girls into the front, and that's the best I can do.
I've tried fittings, tried "real" bras, and nothing is comfortable for more than a few minutes.
I've tried fittings, tried "real" bras, and nothing is comfortable for more than a few minutes.
Star*
call 911........call 911
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GoingNorth
Crazy Cat Lady
Abbers, you are a girl after my own heart. I'll be fifty in July. I am NOT small breasted. Yes. I do sag and yes, they swing in the breeze, but if the girls ain't happy, mama's not happy.
