hi i have therapy every sunday. she's gotten to know me so very well this past year. since learning of the diagnosis of complex ptsd, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and adhd in me it's been liberating to understand i do have some stuff which explains some stuff i go through. yet since facing a trauma this past year that was hidden for years (repressed memories), hence than being diagnosis with complex ptsd my anxiety can go thru the roof with out much warning. i can go from 0 to 60 in a short time frame. it has given me a much better understanding of difficult child and probably added to the level of patience i display to her. she suggested medication's a while back i didn't want to. i tried an anti depressant at one point that made me want to drive my truck into a wall that was def. a no go!! lol. yet she came up with a plan for me if i didn't want to use medications.....which is daily maintenance of yoga and meditation and some basic other tips to relieve the symptoms when they hit. yet when i skip days or cluster of days it can be quite rough especially if other issues in my world are creating pressure. this year has completely redefined who i am, my obvious limitations, my outlook, everything. i've had extreme anxiety past 3 days, panic attacks, etc. minimal sleep. all because i didn't do my stuff. it's a real pain in the butt living with this diagnosis. the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (obsessional thinking I have) takes thought to control it and catch myself, the adhd is easy for me to handle at times, yet the ptsd is overwhelming. i am very diligant with difficult child and older daughter, his kids, him, etc. to the point where i forget who i am and what i'm about. yet she explained to me today why it is, that is the fact it's easier for me to work on everyone else and meet their needs than to be quiet within my own self and handle my own needs. she said i often experience life outside my body. creepy. lol. yet i knew what she meant. i don't know if anyone else has been through this personally while handling our difficult child's but if you have i'd love to hear how you managed. once you open that pandora's box and handle the stuff, flashbacks, memories, etc. than realize the diagnosis and all the symptoms start to occur because you were "healthy" and dealt with the past lol. ugh!!!! than everything in your life changes, completely and totally. ok thanks for letting me get that out.