There's nothing wrong with being Gay...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by lovemysons, Jan 27, 2012.

  1. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    easy child daughter has been involved with a girl now for a few years.
    This girl is another one of the "broken-winged" of the world.
    She has had a very disturbing past (including being molested by a adoptive step-dad, now in prison).
    Recently, easy child broke up with her girlfriend and girlfriend moved back home (with a grandmother) here in Tx. easy child and girlfriend had been living together out-of-state where easy child goes to college. But girlfriend had quit her job there...Not holding up to the agreement of sharing cost of their apt, etc. She takes advantage of my easy child in my opinion.

    But I have to say...Last night when husband told me that one of his high school bowlers (husband is bowling coach) shared a text with him. It was from easy child. It said..."I met a boy"...That was the FIRST and ONLY thing yesterday that made me smile.

    Now, I am just hoping that he is not a "wounded soul" too.
    Would be nice if my beautiful, loving and kind daughter would meet up and "share" care with a healthy individual... Boy or Girl.

    SO...We will see where this goes.
    LMS
     
  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    LMS~ I'm sure a lot of our PCs tend to be drawn toward the broken among us because of being raised with difficult children. Our PCs often become the caretakers of the world.
     
  3. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sounds like your husband has come a long way. If I recall he couldn't even bear the thought of easy child choosing an alternative lifestyle a few years ago. All of us need someone to share our life. Whether it is guy who just makes her laugh or a potential date I admire her self confidence and eagerness to find happiness. She's a winner. Hugs DDD
     
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Wishing her the best.... I hope this is a nice guy who does not take advantage of her caring, sensitive ways.
     
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I have always been proud of you in accepting her identity. I am also very sure she is attracted to the wounded souls because of the life she has led. Jamie swears he has always picked girls that remind him of me...sigh.
     
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    difficult children tend to attract other difficult children like a magnet. Even when I was beyond difficult child behavior..........well, I have to be careful of people because I STILL attract difficult children. lol It's like something subconscious we put out there.

    Hopefully difficult child can find a good stable person who really cares for her.
     
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I have to echo the sentiment expressed here: I think she is more attracted to wounded souls than by whether the sexual component is male or female.
    Fingers crossed.
     
  8. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Wishing your easy child much success in her quest for happiness - no matter the sex of the partner she chooses!
     
  9. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Thanks you all...

    DDD,
    Yes, husband has come a Looooong way in accepting easy child's "identity" if that's what it boils down to...Or experimentation, if that be the case.
    He had some very religious conflicts with all of this at first and I was so concerned that this would put a road block in their relationship. But they have simply "avoided" the subject through the years. easy child knows she can talk to me about anything.

    Janet,
    Thank you. I told easy child at the time I found out about her "choice" that I will ALWAYS...ALWAYS love her the same no matter what she ever does, thinks, or feels. I love her unconditionally.

    Before "girls" she had a boyfriend. At age 14 she was "going with" a 16 yr old boy. One day from school she texted me and said, "Mamma I think I need to be on birth control would you take me to the Dr's?" I cannot even begin to tell you how honored I was that my daughter trusted me with taking care of her in this way...trusted me with he life.

    I did NOT tell husband about the text but simply made the Dr appmnt and got on with it. easy child was placed on birth control. I believe she and her boyfriend did engage in sexual contact at least once.
    They broke up and then within a year or 2 she began being interested in girls.
    How many girls??? will trust their mothers or their fathers to do the "right thing" when it comes to sex??? I don't know...I only know that I never trusted my mother. I know my mother did not trust her mother with it either and so on.
    I hope I have been a good example to easy child for her future children.
    I think it's very important to allow them "permission" to talk to us about sex...to help them be responsible for their bodies.

    easy child is studying to be a Psychologist...either Child Psychologist or Sports Psychologist. She has learned an enormous amount about "choices" and genetics/nurture etc through being raised with difficult child brothers. I think she will be able to help alot of people in the future.

    DDD...You are so right, she IS a winner!

    LMS
     
  10. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    One more thing...

    I think it's EXTREMELY important that we don't "Shame" our children into behaving the way we are most comfortable with...

    It's important to allow them to talk to us about Anything...no matter how it differs with our ideas, beliefs, expectations...No matter how "scary" it may be to us.

    My mom has a boyfriend who's daughter is 21. She just had her 3rd baby last week...father's are in jail...first 2 babies are in foster care this last one, last week, given up to adopted family.

    My mom's boyfriend continues to preach "abstinence with her"...It is so sad.
    My mom is encouraging her to get an IUD as the daughter brought the subject up a few days ago.
    But...My mom's boyfriend wants to make HIMSELF feel good...by saying the things that make him feel like a "good dad". He is NOT taking an honest look at who his daughter is and where she is in her life and what she NEEDS. He is simply saying the things that make him feel like a "good parent".
    But truly...What kind of "good parent" is he?

    Anyway...just thinking about shame and about our reactions to our child's emotions and bodies.
    LMS
     
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