Things are not good with difficult child 2

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Mom2oddson, May 8, 2009.

  1. Mom2oddson

    Mom2oddson Active Member

    Today marks nine weeks since difficult child 2's suicide attempt. On Tuesday we had to pick her up from the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that she was at. The insurance company refused to go longer than six weeks. When we arrived to pick her up, the people there informed us that they see a personality disorder in difficult child 2, not BiPolar (BP). Their recommendation was six months in a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that deals with personality disorders...again, the insurance company isn't going for it.

    She's been home for just a couple of days. I think living with Jeckle and Hyde would be easier. Doesn't help that we got sent home with no real instructions on what to do, how to help her, anything.

    difficult child 2 has IOP meetings three times a week for 16 weeks for the addiction problem. The place she is going to and the people there specialize in teens and teens with multiple problems. They will work with her regular psychiatrist (psychiatrist L) to deal with the personality disorder and the rehab.

    Today, we have an appointment with psychiatrist L. I made the appointment because she was taken off abilify after the suicide attack - that may have contributed to it. But the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) put it back on her last week. I want psychiatrist L to bless the abilify or change it. Then I want him to help us find a really good psychiatrist that deals with Personality disorders. I'd like to know which one. (did even know there were multiple ones)... I want difficult child 2 to get the counseling she needs to learn to deal/handle/life with the disorder. And I want to know what to do and how to deal with her.

    I am so over-whelmed right now. This little fishy is so out of water, she's living on the moon. Or so that's how it feels right now. Of all the times to not have a working computer, this is the worst. So, I have to settle for a few minutes before work and during lunch. It's not going to be enough.

    I'd be grateful for any advice you can offer. I'll check back as often as work allows.

    Thank you so much for being here. Knowing that I have a place to go has been my saving grace.
  2. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I wish I had some words of wisdom, but I really don't. Your plan of action sounds right on target. Sending hugs and prayers your way!
  3. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    No advice, just sending lots of hugs, prayers, and extra strength!
  4. Mom2oddson

    Mom2oddson Active Member

    Just knowing that I'm not alone in this, it such great comfort.

    And I know we can do this. I have my Warrior Mom armor polished and ready for battle with any and every agency out there. Plus I have the fabulous resource of the CD Moms who can provide me with all sorts of battle plans.

    My Rhino skin is working well. I haven't engaged in any of the fights difficult child 2 has tried to start and so far, I've been immune to the Drama that she wants. Found out that she thrives on intense Drama. So, we aren't engaging.

    I'm working hard on Me-care. husband and I are in a family support therapy group once a week. I'm going to Al-anon and husband is going to AA/NA meetings. I'm coming here every chance I get.

    Oh, and while wondering through a knitting shop near difficult child 2's counseling place, I found a charity knitting project for soldiers. So, I'm trying my hand at that. It helps my heart to do something to help another Mother's child.

    Well, I better get back to work....
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    The first thing I'd do is be suspcious of a personality disorder diagnosis. Sorry, but it's come out of the blue. Secondly, I would just see a good Psychiatrist to help her. No matter what label she gets, she is the same person she was before this diagnosis and I don't think she needs a "special" psychiatrist or psychologist. She will likely have ten different opinions on what is wrong with her in her lifetime. And with the right medications, she will do better and her diagnosis. will change.

    I think the best kind of therapy for any unglued teen or adult is "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy." It deals with the actual problems and how to see them a different way and deal with them in a total different manner. It's the only therapy, in thirty years of trying mostly useless therapists that actually did permanant good for me. I know I have a mood disorder. I've been told, at various times in my life, that I had other things too and then the next professional would say, "That's outrageous." Pffffffffffft. I deal with what I know and can feel and can change and no longer really care about the label. If you want to see how CBT works, buy "Feeling Good" by Dr. David Burns. It can be adapted for young adults and teens.

    I've seen RTCs with foster kids. in my opinion they aren't the best diagnostic places. Go with your gut and check into CBT :)

    Try to have a better day.
  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Im sorry things are rough.

    I can understand this diagnosis myself because I am diagnosed with both bipolar and borderline personality disorder. I will have to disagree with MWM and say that DBT is the best type of therapy for people with Borderline Personality Disorder. CBT is useful too but DBT is the gold standard now.

    I have some sites for parents of teens with this if you want them.