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This court battle is making him sick
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 724640" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You bet. More like a vacuum cleaner though!</p><p></p><p>I know this does not sound as serious as drug addiction. It's not. But....trust me, this could kill him just like drugs. He is never calm, overly obsessed, very high blood pressure at 40, high cholestral, suicidal at times, a walking heart attack. He eats horribly and doesnt exercise. And he is not a happy man. And at 40, he is a full grown man, middle age. He is not changing anytime soon.</p><p></p><p>Sometimes I wonder why I don't cut him to one day a week. Honestly, my own mother hated me and was never there for me and it broke my heart. I can't go that far. I am no longer sad about my mother, but I don't have it in me to make him feel like I felt. I do often hold the phone from my ear when we talk and I limit time.</p><p></p><p>But I will never cut him off unless he is a physical threat to me or a thief and he isn't. So I soldier on and enjoy life between his tiring calls.</p><p></p><p>It is a great relief to know he has to stay in Missouri because of his son. He would never leave his son.</p><p></p><p>by the way for ten years of his life, during his entire marriage, I barely heard from him. His wife also kept grandson from our family. Bart didn't try to get her to let us know this grandchild. He went along with her...i spoke to him maybe once a month. Any time our family visited them to see my grandson, ex whisked baby rudely out of the house without an explanation. Funny thing is, she didnt like HER family either! She ran off to friends homes, Bart told me.</p><p></p><p>A few times she called me to swear at me about really odd things and Bart was fine with it. Again, "she is my wife."</p><p></p><p>So he did not really talk to me much until ex ran off with her man during their marriage, leaving him alone with a three year old son and no forwarding address for a full month. THEN the calls began in a frenzy.</p><p></p><p> I never did get that attached to grandson. He is like a stranger. I have seen him maybe six times and he used to live in Chicago so I could have easily seen him. I lived in Chicago too at the time. But we were rarely invited and ex never wanted to see us, so we saw none of them. And got used to, say, holidays with my husband and three other kids. We enjoyed our holidays and family visits without Bart, ex, and Grandson. They were not part of us.</p><p></p><p>Now, in 2017, Bart gets angry that I always see am off to see my granddaughter. Well, guess what! I have seen and known her from Day One. She loves Grammy. Grammy loves her. You can't feel close to a child you don't know. And Bart will not drive to Chicago. I am not sure Grandson even knows who Sonic, Princess and Jumper are. I think Bart wants ME to keep running to St. Louis partly to keep grandson from knowing he has aunts and an uncle. Although my other kids don't like him (and he knows it and it is due to his behavior) all of them would be loving and awesome to his son and cordial to him. It would benefit Grandson to know my hub, me, his amazing aunts and sweet uncle. But he only knows about me and Bart' s father. I think Bart is rmbarassed at how he abused Princess so he keeps away from all his siblings, but who knows? He doesn't like to discuss it.</p><p></p><p>It's a mess with him. No wonder HE is a mess. It's like I have two families. I have a normal, loving family and separately there is him.</p><p></p><p>Well, I am sorry for whining. I am done. Thanks for "listening."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 724640, member: 1550"] You bet. More like a vacuum cleaner though! I know this does not sound as serious as drug addiction. It's not. But....trust me, this could kill him just like drugs. He is never calm, overly obsessed, very high blood pressure at 40, high cholestral, suicidal at times, a walking heart attack. He eats horribly and doesnt exercise. And he is not a happy man. And at 40, he is a full grown man, middle age. He is not changing anytime soon. Sometimes I wonder why I don't cut him to one day a week. Honestly, my own mother hated me and was never there for me and it broke my heart. I can't go that far. I am no longer sad about my mother, but I don't have it in me to make him feel like I felt. I do often hold the phone from my ear when we talk and I limit time. But I will never cut him off unless he is a physical threat to me or a thief and he isn't. So I soldier on and enjoy life between his tiring calls. It is a great relief to know he has to stay in Missouri because of his son. He would never leave his son. by the way for ten years of his life, during his entire marriage, I barely heard from him. His wife also kept grandson from our family. Bart didn't try to get her to let us know this grandchild. He went along with her...i spoke to him maybe once a month. Any time our family visited them to see my grandson, ex whisked baby rudely out of the house without an explanation. Funny thing is, she didnt like HER family either! She ran off to friends homes, Bart told me. A few times she called me to swear at me about really odd things and Bart was fine with it. Again, "she is my wife." So he did not really talk to me much until ex ran off with her man during their marriage, leaving him alone with a three year old son and no forwarding address for a full month. THEN the calls began in a frenzy. I never did get that attached to grandson. He is like a stranger. I have seen him maybe six times and he used to live in Chicago so I could have easily seen him. I lived in Chicago too at the time. But we were rarely invited and ex never wanted to see us, so we saw none of them. And got used to, say, holidays with my husband and three other kids. We enjoyed our holidays and family visits without Bart, ex, and Grandson. They were not part of us. Now, in 2017, Bart gets angry that I always see am off to see my granddaughter. Well, guess what! I have seen and known her from Day One. She loves Grammy. Grammy loves her. You can't feel close to a child you don't know. And Bart will not drive to Chicago. I am not sure Grandson even knows who Sonic, Princess and Jumper are. I think Bart wants ME to keep running to St. Louis partly to keep grandson from knowing he has aunts and an uncle. Although my other kids don't like him (and he knows it and it is due to his behavior) all of them would be loving and awesome to his son and cordial to him. It would benefit Grandson to know my hub, me, his amazing aunts and sweet uncle. But he only knows about me and Bart' s father. I think Bart is rmbarassed at how he abused Princess so he keeps away from all his siblings, but who knows? He doesn't like to discuss it. It's a mess with him. No wonder HE is a mess. It's like I have two families. I have a normal, loving family and separately there is him. Well, I am sorry for whining. I am done. Thanks for "listening." [/QUOTE]
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This court battle is making him sick
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