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<blockquote data-quote="greenrene" data-source="post: 574924" data-attributes="member: 9177"><p>Yes, I'm the evil one, and it SUCKS because while I freely admit to having my own issues, and I know that I have made a lot of mistakes and haven't been the perfect stepmom, she is still an EXTREMELY DIFFICULT child and always has been. Apparently my husband's dad is furious that it's come to this and blew up at husband yesterday. My mother in law is really sad about everything, to the point that she could hardly talk about it yesterday (according to sister in law). My husband is apparently extremely upset about the whole situation (wouldn't know, he's so stoic around me and has been so busy that we have barely had a chance to talk about any of it). Everyone is talking to everyone else, but my sister in law is the only one who is talking to ME.</p><p></p><p>This is far from over, but at least I can breathe. She's gone now, and most likely won't be living with me again. It's heartbreaking, and I can't help but feel like a colossal failure - back when we first got custody of her, I had these high hopes for helping her because she truly had it rough living with her biomom. I know that she was very definitely better off with us, but it still wasn't enough. It hurts SO much to feel like people blame me - I've got to hold my head high and know that they haven't walked in my shoes, not even CLOSE.</p><p></p><p>It's a long, complicated story - if it's okay, I might feel the need to decompress sometimes by sharing more of it here. I'm going to stick around because there are so many of you whose stories I've been following, whom I've come to care about.</p><p></p><p>I'm hoping that now that the stress of day-to-day living with difficult child is gone, I can make some positive changes in my life to make things better. I've been living in survival mode for SO long, I don't think I even know what "normal" is supposed to feel like. difficult child came to live with us 13 years ago when husband and I had only been DATING for 7 months. We were living together with the intention of getting married, but it was very sudden and unexpected the day that biomom brought her over to stay for good. sister in law has told me that she doesn't know if she would have even stayed around if it were her in my situation. She does at least give me credit for trying, she just says that I was pretty much set up to fail from the beginning.</p><p></p><p>Anyway. Now I can focus on me, my husband, and my boys. It's going to be strange around here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="greenrene, post: 574924, member: 9177"] Yes, I'm the evil one, and it SUCKS because while I freely admit to having my own issues, and I know that I have made a lot of mistakes and haven't been the perfect stepmom, she is still an EXTREMELY DIFFICULT child and always has been. Apparently my husband's dad is furious that it's come to this and blew up at husband yesterday. My mother in law is really sad about everything, to the point that she could hardly talk about it yesterday (according to sister in law). My husband is apparently extremely upset about the whole situation (wouldn't know, he's so stoic around me and has been so busy that we have barely had a chance to talk about any of it). Everyone is talking to everyone else, but my sister in law is the only one who is talking to ME. This is far from over, but at least I can breathe. She's gone now, and most likely won't be living with me again. It's heartbreaking, and I can't help but feel like a colossal failure - back when we first got custody of her, I had these high hopes for helping her because she truly had it rough living with her biomom. I know that she was very definitely better off with us, but it still wasn't enough. It hurts SO much to feel like people blame me - I've got to hold my head high and know that they haven't walked in my shoes, not even CLOSE. It's a long, complicated story - if it's okay, I might feel the need to decompress sometimes by sharing more of it here. I'm going to stick around because there are so many of you whose stories I've been following, whom I've come to care about. I'm hoping that now that the stress of day-to-day living with difficult child is gone, I can make some positive changes in my life to make things better. I've been living in survival mode for SO long, I don't think I even know what "normal" is supposed to feel like. difficult child came to live with us 13 years ago when husband and I had only been DATING for 7 months. We were living together with the intention of getting married, but it was very sudden and unexpected the day that biomom brought her over to stay for good. sister in law has told me that she doesn't know if she would have even stayed around if it were her in my situation. She does at least give me credit for trying, she just says that I was pretty much set up to fail from the beginning. Anyway. Now I can focus on me, my husband, and my boys. It's going to be strange around here. [/QUOTE]
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