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Substance Abuse
This isn't about a teen but thought you all might have wise words
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 398949" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>I doubt very much that a call from you would have any impact on her, especially because you don;t have any contact with her anymore. And I understand completely about you being in a good place right now regarding her and all the emotional chaos she has caused so I sympathize with you not wanting to open up any communication. The way I see it, if you can make the call without jeopardizing your own emotional well being, then do it. No one knows what makes a person finally decide to go into rehab. Many times it is being forced by someone else, not their own free will. While a person is in the midst of their addiction they usually don't want help, the only thing that's important is where their next fix is coming from.</p><p></p><p>Your sister in law's husband is probably the best person to force her into rehab and if he can't then a call from you is not going to, but think about what it will do for your mother in law. If you don't make the call she will always wonder if that would have been the call that helped. It will give her peace of mind. </p><p></p><p>I can tell you that we are right now in the middle of feeling completely abandoned by my family with difficult child's addiction. Over the years I have tried to shelter my family (dad and sister and her family)from much of her behavior but they have witnessed a lot of what she has put us through. When she went into rehab they never called once to see how it was going. When she got out and went to outpatient they never asked about her. When she relapsed they never called, never asked if there was anything they could do. When I asked them not to drink at Christmas Eve they got upset and drank anyway, sneaking in the kitchen to do it. When difficult child left home and was on the street between Christmas and New Year they never once called. The triggers for an addict are very strong and even hearing the can of a beer or pop open can cause them to relapse. The relationship between my sister and I is nonexistant right now. I will always feel that she did not support us when we needed it most. We were always very clsoe and it hurts me that it has come to this. I'm telling you this so that it doesn;t happen to you. Addiction is a disease of the entire family. It affects all of us in so many ways as you have described. Your sister in law has a huge battle in front of her. Perhaps the only way she wiull get help is if her family draws the line in the sand and tells her they will all leave if she doesn't get help. Has her husband considered an intervention?</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 398949, member: 59"] I doubt very much that a call from you would have any impact on her, especially because you don;t have any contact with her anymore. And I understand completely about you being in a good place right now regarding her and all the emotional chaos she has caused so I sympathize with you not wanting to open up any communication. The way I see it, if you can make the call without jeopardizing your own emotional well being, then do it. No one knows what makes a person finally decide to go into rehab. Many times it is being forced by someone else, not their own free will. While a person is in the midst of their addiction they usually don't want help, the only thing that's important is where their next fix is coming from. Your sister in law's husband is probably the best person to force her into rehab and if he can't then a call from you is not going to, but think about what it will do for your mother in law. If you don't make the call she will always wonder if that would have been the call that helped. It will give her peace of mind. I can tell you that we are right now in the middle of feeling completely abandoned by my family with difficult child's addiction. Over the years I have tried to shelter my family (dad and sister and her family)from much of her behavior but they have witnessed a lot of what she has put us through. When she went into rehab they never called once to see how it was going. When she got out and went to outpatient they never asked about her. When she relapsed they never called, never asked if there was anything they could do. When I asked them not to drink at Christmas Eve they got upset and drank anyway, sneaking in the kitchen to do it. When difficult child left home and was on the street between Christmas and New Year they never once called. The triggers for an addict are very strong and even hearing the can of a beer or pop open can cause them to relapse. The relationship between my sister and I is nonexistant right now. I will always feel that she did not support us when we needed it most. We were always very clsoe and it hurts me that it has come to this. I'm telling you this so that it doesn;t happen to you. Addiction is a disease of the entire family. It affects all of us in so many ways as you have described. Your sister in law has a huge battle in front of her. Perhaps the only way she wiull get help is if her family draws the line in the sand and tells her they will all leave if she doesn't get help. Has her husband considered an intervention? Nancy [/QUOTE]
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