the 40th year of the passing of my aunt S and the 30th year of the passing of my beloved aunt and godmother H. They were the eldest and the youngest of my mother's sisters. I am now the eldest in my shrinking family. My therapist told me that when one human being loves you when you are a child you will be saved. I am grateful to H. for making me feel special. I have an inkling of what our adopted children might feel. My mother neither liked me nor loved me. What was my fatal flaw that I WAS NOT GOOD ENOUGH? This Memorial Day I am also remembering my marine father who was seriously injured in WWII. I could watch the shrapnel move up and down his legs, depending on the weather. He suffered often and didn't know when the pain would hit. I never know when my pain will hit, despite all my years of therapy. I have a piece of shrapnel in my soul, moving around, wondering what was my fatal flaw and why I was never good enough.